this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2025
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chapotraphouse

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[–] Comrade_Mushroom@hexbear.net 49 points 1 week ago (1 children)

this shit is so stale dude lmao

can these dipweeds just go back to being evil without also being laboriously embarrassing already

[–] miz@hexbear.net 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

feels like a second-rate knockoff of a Verhoeven movie

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 13 points 1 week ago

Let's do this thing. I know, I know. Why not 2026? Well, a moonshot takes time.

Trump (2027) - "Something called 'Hexbear' willed my movie into existence. I was merely the coordinator turning the wondrous visions appearing in my mind into reality," says celebrated European director Paul Verhoeven.

[–] joaomarrom@hexbear.net 46 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I normally find making Idiocracy references to be kinda hackneyed, but jesus christ the US government is not helping at all lmao

[–] robot_dog_with_gun@hexbear.net 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

in idiocracy there was spectacle but they found the smartest guy in the world and followed his advice.

[–] Triton420@mander.xyz 17 points 1 week ago

We’re not at the bottom yet we have a long way to go before we get our Camacho

[–] Maturin@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago

I’m actually pretty excited for the all-electric guitar pep band

[–] dkr567@hexbear.net 30 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

No social assist and services, just trashy circus for its dying citizens with paywalls for access

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I wonder if I can come up with a "trashy bread and circuses" meme post. I wish I had some artistic skill. I'd love to be able to do even a rough sketch on that theme. But all I can do is stick figures.

[–] NinjaGinga@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Frankly, I think we need look no further than this masterpiece in a visual expression of the US writ large:

feast-1feast-2

[–] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago

many many French fries

[–] NuraShiny@hexbear.net 28 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Dwayne Camacho will be president in our lifetimes

[–] robot_dog_with_gun@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Camacho would probably drone strike fewer people than obama and he'd prosecute previous administrations for their crimes.

[–] NuraShiny@hexbear.net 13 points 1 week ago

I agree. Camacho is an aspirational candidate.

[–] dead@hexbear.net 24 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This is scheduled to happen on July 4, 2026. Trump has been talking about it since before the last July 4. 2026 will be the 250th Independence Day. 1776 + 250

[–] Azarova@hexbear.net 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This 250th anniversery of the country brought to you by CoinBase!

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago

Trump better be wearing a toga like that cringey statue of George Washington wearing a toga.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 23 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Trump gets to watch his muscle men duke it out in the arena in his own backyard. Let's make this a night to remember and serve something good to the guests like McDonald's feast

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago

Young man, there's no need to feel down, I said
Young man, pick yourself off the ground, I said
Young man, 'cause you're in DC town
There's no need to be unhappy
Young man, there's a place you can go, I said
Young man, when you're long on your dough you can
Be there and I'm sure you will find
Many ways to have a good time

It's fun to be at the White-House-Cage-Match
It's fun to be at the White-House-Cage-Match
They have everything for young men to enjoy
You can hang out with all the boys

---

"White-House-Cage-Match" is pretty lame but I just couldn't figure how get four (ideally) identical length syllables in there.

[–] Leon_Grotsky@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago

Bring out our Beautiful Boaters and the Handsome Generals! Somebody get Mike Lindell on the line! We're about to party like it's 2016!

trump-moist

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago

Trump needs to do this while reclining on those Roman couch-chairs and having someone feed grapes into his mouth.

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 19 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Hell yeah let's have a boxing match outside Number 10 Downing Street too. Keir vs Corbyn. Corbyn may be old but my money's still on him, dude is old-man jacked.

[–] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

more politicians should fistfight each other

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

👏 bring👏 back 👏 pistols👏at👏 dawn 👏

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Can you believe this shit?

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] miz@hexbear.net 18 points 1 week ago

NOOOOO

I have to get the fuck out of this accursed shithole

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 17 points 1 week ago

Please for the love of God, let someone put a bomb under the ring timmy-pray

[–] BadTakesHaver@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

trump needs to do a white house smash bros tourney to win back the Gamer vote.

[–] purpleworm@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago

Epstein can make his comeback

[–] TheModerateTankie@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago

The GOP will never lose the concussed meathead vote.

[–] MaxOS@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago

okay, this is epic

[–] calidris@hexbear.net 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Rom@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

The bread is loaded with sugar and the circus is AI slop

[–] Cat_Daddy@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago

It's McDonald's buns

[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I just hope everyone has a good time. blob-no-thoughts

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago

...and gets a participation trophy

[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

what if we had a cage match and it was nicholas cage vs. david cage

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago

With music by John Cage. Or no music by John Cage. Technically if the no music existed - it would only be for majority of the first round.

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago

my-hero Elon Musk vs Nicolas Maduro! maduro-katana-1maduro-katana-2

~~Bread~~ and circuses

[–] daniyeg@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

imagine the card is a rematch between dana white and his wife but this time his wife can hit him back

[–] Meltyheartlove@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago

mmm lawn match

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Possible oval office walkout

What should his walkout music be?

He's surely gonna do it. What wouldn't he do it?

[–] Cat_Daddy@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago

R.E.M. It's The End of the World

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

There was that week where the libs were focused on how weird the Rs were and it was super effective so they stopped doing it.

This is weird.