this post was submitted on 19 May 2024
305 points (92.7% liked)

Not The Onion

12304 readers
272 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Former President Trump said he wants President Biden to be drug-tested before their first debate.

“I’m gonna demand a drug test too, by the way,” Trump said at the Minnesota Republican Party’s Lincoln Reagan Dinner Friday. “I am, no I really am. I don’t want him coming in like the State of the Union, he was high as a kite.”

Trump has previously stated in a radio interview that Biden was “all jacked up” at the beginning of his State of the Union address, as well as “higher than a kite.”

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 203 points 6 months ago (18 children)

Remember back in 2016 when Trump challenged Bernie Sanders to a debate? Bernie said sure and Trump had to walk it back.

The last thing Trump and his people wants it to have to have him stand up in an uncontrolled setting.

I'll be amazed if these debates happen.

[–] Jimmyeatsausage@lemmy.world 91 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Do the debates, and reveal the results of the drug test (taken by both candidates) DURING the debate. Let's do this shit like Maury.

[–] acetanilide@lemmy.world 27 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Can Maury reveal it as well?? I would actually watch it then!

[–] nickhammes@lemmy.world 10 points 6 months ago (5 children)

Can Maury moderate it? Bring in some family members before they reveal the test results, maybe some videos played to tell us a bit more about them

load more comments (5 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (17 replies)
[–] quinkin@lemmy.world 145 points 6 months ago (3 children)

So Trump is on drugs.

Conservative projection is a confession.

[–] MajorHavoc@programming.dev 34 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Conservative projection is a confession.

It's tragic how many potentiall talented drag queens are probably hiding their inner light in the GOP right now. Not just because they would feel better about themselves, but because they would cause less harm, and be more of a blessing to their families.

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 23 points 6 months ago

Wasn’t trump’s White House doc handing out hard drugs line candy?

[–] hperrin@lemmy.world 9 points 6 months ago

He’s probably been on drugs for decades. He accused Biden of being on drugs 4 years ago.

[–] Gingerlegs@lemmy.world 112 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Please drug test trump 🙏🏻

[–] newtraditionalists@kbin.social 70 points 6 months ago

Yeah, this is clearly one of those the accusation is a confession moments.

[–] sndmn@lemmy.ca 32 points 6 months ago

It's always projection with these people.

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 107 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I'd love for both of them to take one.

[–] spicytuna62@lemmy.world 36 points 6 months ago (1 children)

But then the results of that would be rigged, too.

[–] acetanilide@lemmy.world 7 points 6 months ago

Maybe they have to be filmed the whole time 🤔 I wonder if Abbott would let Pornhub operate again if they agreed to film Biden taking a drug test

[–] ryven@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 6 months ago

Yes, please. Subject politicians to the same indignities as the rest of us.

[–] goferking0@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 6 months ago

With blind live reading of the results

[–] gregorum@lemm.ee 89 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Make Trump take a cognitive test issued by a board certified and independent neurologist and gerontologist.

[–] Boozilla@lemmy.world 72 points 6 months ago (2 children)

"Bicycle. Giraffe. Football. Umbrella. There, I'm done. Aced it."

"Sir, I asked for your name and today's date ."

[–] Emperor@feddit.uk 26 points 6 months ago

"And I stand by my answer, Goddammit!"

[–] IvanOverdrive@lemm.ee 9 points 6 months ago

That is my name. Uh... Bisexual Zebra...

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 66 points 6 months ago
[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 57 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Trump has to debate diaperless. First shart ends the debate.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 37 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Why would you torture the janitor like that?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] mkwt@lemmy.world 50 points 6 months ago (12 children)

These are both old men... They both take a lot of drugs. This is America. Have you seen an older person who doesn't have weekly pill organizer?

load more comments (12 replies)
[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 48 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Sure, reasonable enough.

Trump gets one too, no special treatments, right? RIGHT?

[–] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 32 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Trump could come steam rolling into the debate with tiny pupils and white powder under his nose and Republicans would give zero fucks. Also, he is clearly on drugs because with Trump, every accusation is an admition.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] normalexit@lemmy.world 39 points 6 months ago

I wish Biden would say something to the effect of "I'm the president of the United States, I don't entertain 'demands' from candidates '.

[–] blindbunny@lemmy.ml 37 points 6 months ago

I can't wait to see Donny coked up to the gills again so we can all pretend he's not snorting every five seconds into the fucking microphone

[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 36 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Anyone remember twitler sniffing like a cokehound all through one of the 2016 debates? Total projection, as usual.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Forestial@lemmy.world 33 points 6 months ago (2 children)

This may be a ploy for Trump to avoid the debates, since he knows he's likely to lose as in 2020. Biden refuses the drug test, Trump then refuses to debate....

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 25 points 6 months ago (4 children)

How about we just fill them both with amphetamines right before the debate? Would make it entertaining at least.

load more comments (4 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] suction@lemmy.world 29 points 6 months ago

So this proves Trump is taking drugs before going on stage. Every accusation is a confession.

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 26 points 6 months ago

Christ, this man is an imbecile.

[–] nixcamic@lemmy.world 26 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 26 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Or: dose them both the fuck up. Let's see the both of them up there rolling like the old lady from Requiem for a Dream.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] EatATaco@lemm.ee 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

If it hasn't come at trump's request, I would agree with you. But allowing trump to get this win when it comes to changing the requirements for the debates would just open the door for more demands.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] voluble@lemmy.world 26 points 6 months ago

Oh look, the sequel to birth certificate.

[–] t3h_fool@lemmy.world 23 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Says the man who showed up late for one of the debates in one of the last election, presumably because he didn't want to be covid tested.

[–] Naja_Kaouthia@lemmy.world 14 points 6 months ago

However, drugs are mandatory for viewers.

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 14 points 6 months ago
load more comments
view more: next ›