My husband's immediate response: "what about all the men who have licked the salt lamp before me?"
spoiler
It's extra funny because he didn't care about how much of a ho I was.
this post was submitted on 06 Oct 2026
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Steal the memory and storage from their PC then make a run for it
Take apart their vape pens for the flashable MCUs, microphones, decent battery, and sweet magnets, and then bounce
microphones?
Yep! The heating coil voltage should only start ramping up when the user is inhaling, and how do you detect that they're inhaling?
With a friggin microphone! The negative air pulls the drum up and that's enough to send a signal to the MCU
You can see some examples here
Why don't they do what MAF sensors in cars do? I.e. measure how fast a warm wire cools, which directly tells you how many molecules are hitting that wire and therefore how fast air is flowing past it?
I'm guessing it's because microphones are cheap
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Will licking this Himalayan salt lamp make it easier to insert into my anus?
Unironically yes.
my grandma used to have one in the back of a fireplace to make it look pretty. I asked her what it was and she said a salt lamp. I was a dumb kid so OBVIOUSLY I needed to know what it tasted like. When she wasn't around I crawled back there and took a lick. What I didn't account for is that it would be covered in ash and dust and my tongue would just be covered in that instead.
Good times.
E. What's a Himalayan salt lamp and have I ever licked one?
One of these bois:
I don’t know if you’ve ever licked one, but I sure have.
And what's the experience like? One of the higher ups at my workplace has one in their office and I need to know if the risk is worth the reward
You don't know what you're missing.
I’ve licked salt licks. I grew up around farm/farm-adjacent animals, and I’ve always been very curious, so I’ve tried a lot of things my animals consume..
The flavored salt licks are fun. I genuinely understand why they like them. Especially of their diet is deficient. Bet they taste like magic if your diet isn’t just full of salt already.
For some reason that probably has to do with surface area, granulated salt tastes much much saltier than salt licks. So I’m not joking about them tasting nice, it’s a totally different thing to table salt.
Boss makes a dollar, you make a dime. Lick that salt on company time!
Probably not, but it’s admittedly odd to verify that a home furnishing is obviously also a lump of seasoning.
Do that while holding eye contact with said higher up
It's pretty salty but I think it's worth the risk.
Would recommend finding a spot to gradually erode away with repeated licking
Salt with a potential of dustiness (the latter all depends on the lamp).
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It's literally a giant salt crystal with a light bulb in. I have no idea what it's supposed to do, or why it's got to be Himalayan.
It's pink, which is a pretty and uncommon color for salt from other places.
It's Himalayan and therefore oriental.
It's a crystal, but cheap (cause it's salt).
Some weirdos think crystals have beneficial magic properties just from being in their vicinity.
Combine those and you have the perfect mass-market object for white people to become obsessed with.
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Drink their lava lamp.
I was a kid and had some classmates over for a slumber party. Unknown to me, at some point someone cracked open the top to my lava lamp and it somehow dribbled over the top and ruined my PS1. I can't look at a lava lamp the same again.
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Make sure you wrap your licker! You don't know how many unwrapped licker people have licked that Himalayan salt lamp before you! Or even which animals! You could end up with ... Dry Tongue!
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If only they would know that Himalayan salt can be a great deodorant. (With some caveats)
E: Secretly take out my hidden stash of himalayan salt and eat as much as i can before they return
Nah, I have hypertension. Can't do it.
I've done this lol
Dude... rob them tf (/j)
Crawl under the covers and fall asleep?
Now I'm going to have intrusive thoughts about licking Himalayan salt lamps. What does it taste like? Does the light change flavor?? What do moths think of Himalayan salt lamps???
I tried licking those lamps and also licking straight up Himalayan salt blocks. They don’t taste any different from regular salt to me. The prevailing flavor is salt.
A salt lamp tasting like salt?
Say it ain't so!
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I've seen this meme before and I definitely have intrusive thoughts about licking my gf's Himalayan salt lamp. Still haven't tried it yet, even though she said I could when I jokingly brought it up, because I'm pretty sure it would be disappointing.
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