this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

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4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

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5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

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2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

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9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

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[–] BluJay320@lemmy.blahaj.zone 151 points 5 days ago (2 children)
[–] protist@retrofed.com 26 points 5 days ago

Totally got me. Almost sent this to all my friends

[–] SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 5 days ago

Oh thank fuck

[–] Derpenheim@lemmy.zip 67 points 5 days ago (4 children)

I wish you warm pillows and icy bathroom floors

[–] Hideakikarate@sh.itjust.works 13 points 5 days ago

Soggy french fries, a dead remote control.

[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 23 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] brbposting@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 3 points 5 days ago

Not mine, but likely originated from.

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago

May your favorite shirt never fit right again.

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[–] phoenixarise@lemmy.world 60 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Man fuck this holiday 😂

[–] j_elgato@leminal.space 11 points 5 days ago

It quieted down a good bit - used to be every site had their own gag.

After the 2016 election it was quietly decided that we had been fucked with enough, and didn't need to spend EXTRA time reading something online that we couldn't possibly accept as being true.

[–] whotookkarl@lemmy.dbzer0.com 38 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] LiveLM@lemmy.zip 2 points 5 days ago

It's all good, man

[–] Snowclone@lemmy.world 19 points 5 days ago

May the inside of your ear always itch. Just past the bend.

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 24 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Fuck you. Up your nose with a rubber hose

[–] BallShapedMan@lemmy.world 27 points 5 days ago

Damnit... I hate you so much right now.

[–] Bamboodpanda@lemmy.world 18 points 5 days ago

Haha top tier shit post.

[–] Surp@lemmy.world 20 points 5 days ago (4 children)

I hope you go pee in the toilet pull up your pants or put your dong back in your pants and then some pee comes out of your private part that was left inside of said private part and leaks in your pants while at your workplace so you have to be wet for awhile in your crotch area.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 6 points 5 days ago (2 children)

This happens to me a lot. Do you think it's a curse like this or should like see a doctor maybe?

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[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 15 points 5 days ago

Immediately thought he must be dead. I was just saying to my partner how awesome the JP music is while we watched whatever the new piece of crap (but entertaining) thing was. Great music. Some of the best.

[–] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 16 points 5 days ago

I audibly gasped 🖕

[–] PizzaLamp25@lemmy.world 17 points 5 days ago (1 children)

You made me say "WHAT THE FUCK, NO!" in a meeting.

[–] nagaram@startrek.website 7 points 5 days ago

And didn't you learn a valuable lesson about scrolling socials when you should have focused on those KPIs?

[–] BeardededSquidward@lemmy.blahaj.zone 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Don't fucking scare me like that!

[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I mean, he really is 94. You're going to have to prepare yourself.

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[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 15 points 5 days ago
[–] idegenszavak@sh.itjust.works 13 points 5 days ago
[–] BurgerBaron@piefed.social 6 points 5 days ago

Okay you finally got me you motherfuck, proud of you ❤️

[–] randamumaki@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 5 days ago

He looks good for his age.

[–] LordCrom@lemmy.world 9 points 5 days ago

Fuck you

You got an actual GASP out of me on this post.

[–] umbrella@lemmy.ml 10 points 5 days ago

sneaky. great bit.

[–] TastyWheat@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago

I have but one updoot to give. Fucking brilliant 👏

[–] EfreetSK@lemmy.world 10 points 5 days ago

Ah, may he rest in sheets.

I mean everyone needs a good sleep, especially at such age

[–] Armand1@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Unrelated, but I just learnt that Dick van Dyke is 100 years old as of last December and still kicking.

[–] IntrovertTurtle@lemmy.zip 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

That... How many degrees of Kevin Bacon did you fly through, to teach this thought? 👀

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 days ago

Famous old man still alive

[–] S_H_K@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 5 days ago

La concha de tu madre...

[–] JDPoZ@lemmy.world 6 points 5 days ago

Literally made my heart jump.

[–] Strider@lemmy.world 3 points 5 days ago
[–] WanderWisley@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago

Almost had my heart drop out my ass reading this.

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago

i hate this day i hate this day i hate this day

my parent's anniversary today btw. source of much ribbing for them.

[–] ptolemai@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago

He's decomposing

[–] VerilyFemme@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 5 days ago

Fuck thee profligate scum.

Ave True to Caesar.

[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 3 points 5 days ago

Pretty asshole post, ngl

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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