These posts are fake guys.
400 points upvoted and didnt even happen.
this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2026
524 points (99.6% liked)
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ok and now what it's still kinda funny
You guys are getting free bread?
ITT: people taking a shitpost seriously again, lmao
Its called a stupid excuse.
Dodged a bullet, etc., but still, why? What's the thinking here as to why you should wait to start eating the bread?
To signal wealth
Only the poors enjoy bread enough to reach for it immediately.
If I had received this text, I would consider myself lucky
Bullet: dodged
Carbs: acquired
Bullet: dodged
Crabs: dodged
All hail the bread.
Fuck bitches, eat bread
\[T]/ 🥖
I thought it was five seconds. Five minutes maybe for the last roll if you've had two or three already. I can't stand it when everyone is so damn polite not wanting to take the last one of a shared food item to the point of allowing it to go to waste. Give it a fair pause but then take that last roll or cookie or whatever if you want it.
I mean I prefer to have a roll while they're still warm.
I give everyone an easy out in that situation, because the people I eat with just look at me by default to take the last one. It did take a while of me saying, "Well if no one else wants it, I'll take it," to get to that point.
OP after never talking to this person again:
"Everybody knows [...]" means my parent(s) had some weird or strict rules and life lessons that I had hounded into me which I internalized into my very being and never questioned, and now I have unspoken and often unrealistic expectations of people and the world that no one has absolutely any reason to know about.
This should be the reply.
Nah it should be "bye"
¿Por qué no los dos?
One person's red flags are another person's dodged bullets.
Yeah, wait for the bread to stop being warm and fresh before you eat.
"What am I suppose to Jerry!? Just ADMIRE it??"
Guess they love cold bread!
Genuinely, I believe this originates from their family preventing them from filling up on bread at restaurants.
Families really mess some people up with their made up rules. Meet a girl that was raised that you can't talk at the dinner table. She thought it was normal to sit down, eat an entire meal, and then get up in dead silence.
I remember meeting someone in high school that was confused that everyone was eating and drinking in the same meal. Because in their house and extremely limited world view, you EAT. Then you leave the table and go DRINK.
I think you're right. I guess they had parents who were big on setting rules, but not on justifying them.
I'm pretty sure my parents throttled my bread intake at restaurants when I was very young for the reason you state, but they accompanied their directive with a "don't fill up before you get your main course" justification. So I didn't assimilate it as a rule of etiquette, and instead understood the underlying logic.
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That is a red flag text.
Nice, dodged a bullet
"After seeing you enjoy good food as it was intended, I don't think I want to continue this. Everyone knows food must only be eaten after you upload pictures of it to Instagram and get a certain number of interactions."
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I feel like this has to be a guy writing this to a woman right? There's no chance that it's the other way around.
She's confusing the rule about eating food dropped on the floor. SMH. 😔
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I'd reply with 'I don't like people who can't use capital letters anyway' since we're going with unimportant things.
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I guarantee whoever wrote that will be single for their entire life.
Don't worry, they probably wrote it to themselves for internet likes.
...Not that that makes it less true.
The general thing to do is to peruse the menu to find what you want first to get that out of the way as the wait staff can be pretty quick when you first sit down. If the bread won't distract you during, go for it. You just really want to get your order in when they come by as it could turn into a while before they come back.
They were probably taught something like that, but it became so corrupted that the entire reasoning was lost, leaving only an arbitrary wait time.
Ok serious question. I live in a country where they don't serve you free bread.
What do you do if you eat all the delicious bread then you aren't hungry anymore?
I had this real life scenario happen when I was in Canada and we felt obligated to order mains even though we didn't want them.
Is it socially acceptable to pay for your drinks and leave?
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“We have a rule, if you order the nachos to share, one person can’t just eat all the fully loaded nachos.”
Whaaaaaaaat? Bewildered expression
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