this post was submitted on 01 Feb 2026
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Chapotraphouse

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They should have canceled this show ten years ago, the writers are just fucking with us at this point

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[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 60 points 2 months ago (3 children)

It's stupid because the only thing sheltering these jackasses is the fact that they have enough money to buy themselves out of any trouble

If I had a billion dollars, I wouldn't have a billion dollars

I would have a mobile command fortress grinding across the entire USA, CONQUERING EVERYTHING WITH MY ARMY OF INHUMANOIDS

[–] architect@thelemmy.club 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Finally I met someone else that understands this type of ambition.

If we both become billionaires, I’ll meet you in the battlefield.

[–] redparadise@lemmygrad.ml 10 points 2 months ago

Except in order to become a billionaire you would have to abandon any and all principles which determine what you would be doing with such money if you were to receive it instantaneously.

[–] EveningCicada@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago

the billion dollar killdozer

Mortal Engines ass idea

[–] ClimateStalin@hexbear.net 37 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Just so we’re clear the Xbox live ban had nothing to do with him individually, everyone on the New York State sex offender registry was banned

The rest is absurd though

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 18 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Wait, how does Xbox know you're on a sex offender registry?

[–] ClimateStalin@hexbear.net 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

My guess is credit card info, but I haven’t actually looked into it

Credit card info to know who you are, who’s on the sex offender registry because the state of New York told them

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I guess but I'd assume it'd be hard to make a program that scans all the credit card info of every user and matches it to government sex offender registry information. Like you can just go by name since I'm sure there are plenty of other "Jeff Epstein'" in the world (though I'd imagine now most of them have changed their names)

[–] ClimateStalin@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Hmm yeah that’s a good point. Is it as simple as like, email? If you were dumb enough to sign up for Xbox live with the same email you put down on your court forms?

[–] krolden@lemmy.ml 9 points 2 months ago

He wasn't a smart guy

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

My main thing is I imagine there'd be some legality concerns about law enforcement, banks and Microsoft all sharing data like that. Also I imagine the government records are probably kept with older hardware and software.

[–] ClimateStalin@hexbear.net 3 points 2 months ago

Instead of just speculating more I found an article from the time https://techli.com/sex-offenders-banned-gaming/3714/

Looks like before they even initiated it they required registered offenders to register email addresses and online screen names. They banned 3500 accounts at that time.

I would imagine in the time since people are stingier about giving all of their screen names.

You could get Xbox Live through pre-paid cards that you bought at gamestop (I know because this is how I did it as a kid). No credit card required. You could just use pre-paid cards bought with cash

[–] doublepepperoni@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Your Gamertag is tied to your Microsoft account

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Yeah but in your Microsoft account linked to your actual ID in anyway? Also even if his user name was "JeffEpsteinILoveKids" that could just be a dude with the same name who actually just loves kids in a non-sexual way.

[–] Philosoraptor@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

Also even if his user name was "JeffEpsteinILoveKids" that could just be a dude with the same name who actually just loves kids in a non-sexual way.

Jeff Epstein the young goat specialist really has had a rough few years.

[–] TheVelvetGentleman@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

everyone on the New York State sex offender registry was banned

You do see how this is still silly though, right? No sympathy forremoveds, I'm just saying it's funny that they had their video games taken away.

[–] Salah@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Keeping people who have a record of sex crimes away from chats and multiplayer games with children sounds good in theory.

They should be allowed to play League of Legends on mute, only pings.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 33 points 2 months ago (2 children)

"Hey moot, listen, I need you to do a solid for an old buddy of mine, yeah, Trump, okay...I want you to start a conspiracy that he's saving the world by arresting pedophiles, no, NO, not ME, it's all democrats, okay, like Clinton and shit, oh also throw some woo woo in there about aliens and free energy, yeah, okay, great thanks kid." didnt-kill-himself

[–] axont@hexbear.net 23 points 2 months ago

Qanon started well after moot had quit 4chan although I wouldn't be surprised if he were still involved somehow. That one started as a role play similar to other role plays at the time, like I remember CIAanon and a few others, like one guy claimed he was an infiltrator into the DNC and had proof of some plot to sterilize white people. Qanon is just the one that caught on probably because it was more interactive and had a habit of doing "yes and" improv.

[–] WhatDoYouMeanPodcast@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago

That's the thing that gets me. If you get to make your own hate speech, you're going to be first and foremost anti-jew? Holocaust denial and then ease your way forward from there? I'd predict these people likely aren't going to end up pro-Israel if I were a gambler. Seems like it'd be easier to be anti-immigrant first to give a taste for imperialism. Then I'd use racism like a League of Legends player uses flash - strategic, sparing use for scapegoats. Relying too heavily on it feeds white supremacy which, of course, shunts you right back to Hitler. That way more energy is left for privatizing shit and doing intervention in outside countries. Both of these are very lucrative avenues compared to school shootings and Holocaust statistics arguments.

[–] Bobson_Dugnutt@hexbear.net 29 points 2 months ago (4 children)

FNAF futa SFM porn

I'm glad I don't know what that means

[–] Texas_Instruments_TI_69@hexbear.net 32 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 22 points 2 months ago

Your local public library is a massive repository of freely available information, you can find out more about FNAF futa SFM porn there. Just go onto one of the computers there and start looking up "FNAF futa SFM porn". Be sure to ask one of the librarians for help with what you're looking for, they're very knowledgeable and helpful people. They can help you find out more about FNAF futa SFM porn

[–] Dort_Owl@hexbear.net 23 points 2 months ago

The more ridiculous it is, the more likely they are to get away with it

[–] Saymaz@lemmygrad.ml 20 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's not stupid. The capitalist class used the reactionary internet channels to form a new wave of young, right-wing, pro-imperialist crowd that later reproduced more reactionary movements such as gamergate, reddit belt, Hasbara net etc.

[–] ashestoashes@lemmygrad.ml 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Okay but that doesn't explain the FNAF/SFM porn

[–] FortifiedAttack@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

FNAF has ruined media literacy for an entire generation of kids with its nonsensical lore, in how it tried to outsmart theorists with dumber and dumber plot twists. If you've interacted with the Deltarune or TADC communities, this will become very apparent.

But also, on a more serious note, Scott Cawthon has repeatedly donated the wealth he gained from FNAF to Republican politicians. It doesn't explain the porn, but FNAF is still somehow connected to the far right anyways.

[–] SerialExperimentsGay@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago

If you've interacted with the Deltarune or TADC communities, this will become very apparent.

The Deltarune fandom is so clueless they haven't even realized that Asgore is actually Harry Dubois.

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 15 points 2 months ago

First as milkshake duck, then as farce.

[–] la_tasalana_intissari_mata@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

he missed out on Roxane

[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago

nobody is asking the most pertinent question here: if epstein was a gamer, what was his steam ID?

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Okay so I gleaned that SFM was source filmmaker from some other discussion what exactly is FNAF and please spoiler it for the sake of others if it’s bad

[–] Frivolous_Beatnik@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

People want rubbery cgi porn of the haunted Chuck E. Cheese game? Enough that businessman superspy Robert Maxwell’s daughter’s ex wanted some?

kind-vladimir-ilyich partiotism

[–] doublepepperoni@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago

I believe the thing with FNAF porn, or Minecraft porn, or porn of most shows and games mostly aimed at/associated with children is that you have young people discovering their sexuality while they're also into said show or game, so those wires end up getting crossed and when they get a bit older they start making/consuming porn based on characters they liked.

It would make sense for some weird teenager on 4chan to be cranking it to FNAF porn (editor's note: not really limmy-what) but for Jeffrey Epstein, an incredibly rich guy in his 50s to even know what that is fucking mind-bending

[–] Goblinmancer@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Why doesnt he use his 999999 blackmail to make Bill Gates unban him from Xbox? Welp then again he got himself killed/dead so.

Anyway wokeness total vindicated

[–] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

Woke people are like adults.

Sure, no one likes us and it feels cathartic to rebel against us, but if you grow up, sooner or later you’ll have to become one of us.

[–] Calfpupa@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 months ago

That was part of his plea deal so Bill sent the goon~~er~~s

[–] InexplicableLunchFiend@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Let's see Epstein's Halo 3 stats

[–] Commiechameleon@hexbear.net 2 points 2 months ago

It's listed like one of those green yellow orange red bdsm kink tests, with verbal abuse up top in green, at 100%, and kills or objectives in red near 0%, real alpha™©® male behavior