GrouchyGrouse

We’d get little boats and go “toot toot” at each other and there’d be a choreographed musical number with the aquatic life. The barnacle that reveals itself to be a tenor was a smash hit with the test audiences.

What do you say? Do we pull out the stopper on this one?

So I’m browsing my phone and I see Kyle Rittenhouse, remember that shithead? He’s famous because he killed someone. The right tried to turn him into a celebrity but he was so helpless he couldn’t hack it. He couldn’t handle being on a leash for thousands of dollars. I’d embarrass myself on a street corner frequented exclusively by people I have a crush on for the kind of money this murderer threw away.

Meanwhile Charlie Kirk was a genius by comparison. A bright rising star. Still a fucking racist dumbass but capable of wearing a suit and putting on an act. Capable of speaking while holding eye contact. Capable of subtly decreasing the circumference of his face. Remember the bar is “not a remorseless murderer” so clearing it isn’t impressive but I will give Charlie credit where it’s due: he didn’t kill anyone.

And I think about this. How the right wing is so destructive it can’t help but be self destructive. It produces white male gunmen and here’s 2 case examples from within their own house: Charlie gets killed by the kind of person they defended in Kyle. Enshitification in action. What a bummer. What a letdown. Poor Charlie couldn’t even find a partner who would mourn his passing. Meanwhile Kyle, the guy they all wish they could forget is still around.

It’s a brutal fate. . Couldn’t have happened to a more deserving guy.

Okay we all know that already. I’m not reinventing the wheel.

But I think I am realizing why fascism does certain things and it is rooted in the fact that as capitalism hollows everything out and destroys the society that hosts it the capitalism disjunctions the social fabrics, breaking the social reproduction, and ultimately destabilizing or undoing all the unpaid labors that make society work - the humming substructure that capitalism grafted super structurally into.

So that’s why fascism always obsesses over birth rates and trad shit. It’s them scrabbling to unfuck society from all the ways capitalism fucked society. It’s their mad-hatted dash to pick up the pieces of the delicate shit their bosses broke

I’m phone posting in a mall and it smells like cheap cologne and Starbucks. I’m in the nest of the beast and I’m stewing on shit.

But I think I finally get it and can articulate why someone once said fascism is the immune system of capitalism, fascism is the fever. And it stuck to me. And I think this is how I make sense of it. Christmas shopping the Saturday before the holiday like a big dumb dope who didn’t plan ahead.

But hey I’m having fun, edibles rule.

Is this where it’s at now? Like, I try really hard. I want you all to know I actually try to find comparisons to the current crop of capitalists that aren’t Nazis. I know it’s hackneyed and overdone. So I try.

But he’s twacked out making karate-chop hand motions babbling at 90mh like Hitler finding Czechoslovakia under his Christmas tree

How the fuck am I supposed to work with this?

Solely so I can post lions eating christians to r/catswithjobs

You know how everyone always talks about their what they’d do if they could have a wish come true like a fairytale? I remember doing that as a kid. Aladdin had just come out and everyone was talking about what they’d wish for. Million dollars was a top one. Invincibility another. Laser eyes.

But a genie gives you three wishes, and most people obsess over how to use their wishes to the fullest potential. Or… with three wishes you can wish for more mundane wishes. I wished I no longer had to poop.

But genies are tricky, you have to be specific. So instead I would need some kind of intestinal collar. A machine that obliterates any poop before it gets to the colon. It would have to be a machine, too, as I might need to remotely disable it. I don’t really want to require surgery - or another genie - to turn it off. I might need to shit in the future for personal or political purposes.

The device would require only about my life expectancy x 1.2 or 1.5 times if I really think I’ll hang in there. Nothing beyond the powers of a genie.

As you can see I really worked this all out. No more wiping poop. But I never told people about this. Maybe just wishing I didn’t have to poop.

I never told anyone about the Star Trek inspired colon zapper. If they invented one I’d probably get it installed. I’d feel pretty vindicated.

Lmao, even

Yes please memorialize this shithead instead

When was in the senate she passed legislation about violence in videogames

Meanwhile, those videogames have been great at pushing pro-imperial propaganda and training kids how to use the Xbox/drone controller

Which pipeline kids toward being the bloodstock of the forever wars her neoliberalism demanded.

Kinda funny

Click it because why not

Article is full of quotes from reddit users. It's a circle. It's like an oroborous but instead of a snake eating itself It's an anus shitting itself a new ass. Immediately I feel that way I feel about too much shit these days.

If you ever read the Lovecraft short story The Nameless City we are in it and the big metal door has ominously closed behind us. We're trapped in whatever here is now. The zone, whatever you want to call it. Who cares anymore. Honey, the internet is taking a break from being an advertisement. We're on the news.

His name is Lester and I feel like we should adopt him as an unofficial site mascot. Along with Crow T Robot.

Who else do you think sorta summarizes Hexbear in appearance and attitude from various media? And be specific. Don't just say "raccoons" (even though we all know raccoons is the best fit.)

Discuss!

The democrats would have tripped over themselves crying about it and appealing to norms and civility and their usual gormless bullshit and Kamala would have eaten shit even harder.

And instead of shouting "read the room!" the DNC consultant and liberal pundit classes would have gone along for that ride because they are just as clueless as their bosses.

What's new and what's good, comrades? It was kinda nice being away for the entire election bullshit but otherwise I'm playing catch up for the last 30 days.

I hope you all have been well and you have instituted fully automated luxury communism (with gay characteristics) in my absence.