17 years old: "You are really mature for your age"
this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2025
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Again, I feel introversion is being conflated with social anxiety. I’m totally fine with and even enjoy being around people, I just need a lot of alone time to recharge my battery. Though people see my confidence in social situations and never believe I’m introverted.
Yeah, as someone that is an introvert and had social anxiety, the mixup does get a little annoying. Being an introvert with social anxiety when growing up was a absolute nightmare in my experience. Especially because I wanted to socialize but couldn't bring myself to do it. It's a constant back and forth between "I need alone time" and "I wish I could talk to people" and it made me hate myself for being introverted. Luckily I've managed to mostly get over it as I've gotten older and now I'm happy with being an introvert. Now I'm in your boat and most people don't even realize I'm introverted until they get to know me more personally.
That was the same for me. I didn't realise I had high anxiety especially around people interaction. I just went with what people told me, that I'm introverted. It took me way too long to figure this out and I only did so because my anxiety was getting worse and about more things. Once I was on medication I realised holy shit, I needed this like 20 years ago!
I'm now able to join clubs, meet in large groups. But like you it's now a choice. I generally do the social thing then leave or take some time out when batteries are low.
convoluted
conflated
Thank you!
And there are even more layers to this. How much do you know and like the people you are interacting with? How comfortable are you in the setting/circumstances? How interesting are the activities/conversations?
I found an extrovert that collects introvert friends so I have a social life now. We recently acquired a second extrovert friend who comes up with stuff for us to do when the first one isn't available. All I need to do is show up and maybe bring some food/beer. It's pretty nice all in all.
Man, extroverts who collect introverts, or introverts who put the necessary energy into collecting other introverts, are some of my favourite people.
Know one of the latter who made it a personal mission to make a very cool, but very reserved person her best friend. Took a lot of effort but it's a beautiful friendship that's actually kinda inspiring to see.
Thats like a straight guy collecting a lot of gay friends... Are you sure he is an extrovert? :)
I mean, he's the only one of us that gets laid (by women) with any sort of regularity and he's never tried to fuck me, who I've been told am the most physically attractive of us, so I think it's pretty safe to say he's not gay.
Hehe :) Mostly a joke above but you never know! Get him really drunk and talk about feelings.... :)
Aaah mutualism.
Hell yeah! Sounds like a sweet deal.
Around 40: They've figured out how to live right.
Welcome to the club I'm 62
60: this boomer is alright.
Uhhhh...damn I must've missed something...
If introversion is not socially acceptable (as “creepy” implies), it follows that public healthcare systems should provide free cocaine to those afflicted.
I as an introvert learned to be more extroverted because if not I would be alone. I mean nothing wrong with that, but sometimes I want to see people.
However when I do sth with people it drains my energy. I need to recover. And I will happily stay in my room for days without seeing someone.
And that is what extroverts don't understand. They often gain energy from being with other people.
That's my main problem with group/family vacations. A whole week (or more) with people everywhere all the time. It takes me a lot of time to recover. It's absolutely exhausting.
I see all the people I need to see when I go into town to resupply ;)
I wonder if this introvert/extrovert dichotomy really exists this much or if it's just psychological astrology. Personally, I find it completely irrelevant to myself, but maybe that's just me.
I will be extremely extroverted around people I like and extremely introverted around people I don't like. I can feel recharged by interactions with people I like and discharged by interactions with people I don't like. Isn't that obvious?
With strangers it's all based on my perception of them, derived from their appearance, their context, and any other clues I have.
In groups it's based on the composition of the group. The percentage of people I like or dislike, and also the context. When I'm alone, I'm perfectly content alone. I love being alone and I love hanging out with my friends.
To be honest, I suspect my situation is how pretty much everyone is. I feel like my friends who describe themselves as extroverts and my friends who describe themselves as introverts are really just doing the same thing as each other and as me. I suspect that people who are very pronounced one way or the other, are doing so out of a self-fulfilling prophecy effect resulting from having decided at some point in the past to conceive of themselves as introverted or extroverted. The same way an astrology fan may unwittingly begin to behave according to their sign stereotype.
Ehhh, I wouldn't place it at the same level as astrology. I do think people do the self fulfilling prophecy shit with it though.
I thought I was an introvert for a long time so I kind of became an insular hermit for like 5 years of my life after college and then I realized I was horribly miserable at the end of it.
And then when I forced myself to socialize I realized I actually fucking loved it and my introversion was from bad early social experiences due to autism and living in a backwards rural hellhole.
Introvert and extrovert are descriptions of behavior, not a psychological diagnosis. Nothing you are describing is in conflict with common usage of the terms.
I love hanging out with people and do it whenever I can really. However, I also do lose energy rather quickly in a social scenario and can have to tap out and go be by myself not infrequently. It's not that I dislike social interaction, it's that it's quite draining, which is more how I think of being introverted.
I prefer most of these panels to "you're so quiet!"
Get interesting or knowledgable and you go from creepy to mysterious. Introversion isn't just sitting in a corner by yourself not talking to other people in social situations, that's anxiety.
50% of lemmy is mostly normal high functioning autists who have crippling social anxiety about the idea that anyone might find them creepy.
The other 50% are creeps
I was an annoying kid. Found out a few years ago that I was a brat growing up.
At 17, I can safely say I was annoying. I probably still am.
Now, I'm just lonely.
Don't stress over it. All kids are annoying. If you weren't you probably had some social anxiety problems.
Por que no los dos
joining the creepy team this year
Welcome to the club. I saw a deer skeleton in the woods behind the park, wanna go see?
Big difference between introverted and creepy 🤣
Heavily depends on how attractive they are or aren't
I'm introverted and I got invited everywhere all the time. People liked inviting me because I always showed up and was dependable. Those people who invited me are still my friends today.
18+ you drink too much
Well behaved? Naw they straight up called me a demon child.
Yeah we rock in the privacy of our own homes
Oh the other's fit but not the 3rd panel. No-one ever told me I was boring.