this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2025
109 points (98.2% liked)

Slop.

757 readers
560 users here now

For posting all the anonymous reactionary bullshit that you can't post anywhere else.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No bigotry of any kind, including ironic bigotry.

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 43 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] purpleworm@hexbear.net 43 points 1 month ago (5 children)

These names are so condescending. "Yeah, I'd like some Thirst-Quenching Coke please, not the Coke that doesn't have water in it. Tempting Cheeseburger? No, I want the Ugly, Rancid Cheeseburger.

[–] Guamer@hexbear.net 36 points 1 month ago

Coming right up!

[–] LeninWeave@hexbear.net 24 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Actually, give me the Half-Flavor Orange Drink.

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 26 points 1 month ago

Prepare for unexpected flavors, Mr. LeninWeave

[–] unwarlikeExtortion@lemmy.ml 1 points 4 weeks ago

And I'd like one frozen-over coffee straight from the deep freezer, please.

[–] NinaPasadena@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago

Pure beef? No I'd prefer 50/50 beef/plastic

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 3 points 1 month ago

A beverage needs to consist of a minumum of 90% water to really be thirst-quenching.

[–] FatVegan@leminal.space 2 points 1 month ago

If it's not called garbage in a bag, it's false advertising

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 41 points 1 month ago (3 children)

$0.10 coffee

Something something social democrats are just imperialist wolves in sheep's clothes

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Also 1960s McDonald's probably had the most horrendous coffee imaginable lmao

[–] DogThatWentGorp@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Yeah we're sludge merchants. We're grime-pilled slop heads. If that coffee doesn't taste like, share the same color as, or flow as slow as 20 year old motor oil I don't want it.

I want ground beans at the bottom of the cup black as night. I want to cough like I'm drowning after the first sip. If I look like a complete person aftwards: it's not bad enough. There better be asphalt and rubber cutting the grounds they use.

That's real America right there. None of this hands-in-the-ass drinking a pumpkin bullshit. Wake up thirsty, start your day ruined. If you can't work through the IBS you don't want it enough.

[–] Biggay@hexbear.net 4 points 1 month ago

i bet it tasted great with cigarettes tho

[–] BeanisBrain@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago

No you see they'll import it at fair prices and then sell it at a loss via massive state subsidies

[–] GoodGuyWithACat@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I demand the first order of business after establishing communism is to develop a cheap, mass producible, synthetic coffee.

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 3 points 1 month ago

So dandelion root tea or chicory tea?

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 33 points 1 month ago (2 children)

In China according to google you can grab a street food dinner for about $2

[–] SchillMenaker@hexbear.net 31 points 1 month ago

Actually, according to grok, communism is when no food.

[–] CutieBootieTootie@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

It depends where you are, Tier One cities can have some pretty expensive food but yeah, I would eat like a queen for 20-25 kuai in a relatively smaller city (1mil pop) from hole in the wall shops

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 31 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 2 points 1 month ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Watch out Snake! That's Tempting Cheeseburger! FOXHOUND's top frycook!

[–] Weedian@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

Thar'a right Snake. Its said he can feed an entire platoon an enriching hamburger dinner within less than an hour. Im sure Master Miller knows more, the Chemical Burger earned him millions.

Liquid Snake as Miller:...

[–] DylanMc6@lemmy.ml 17 points 1 month ago (4 children)

i really like the names they gave - "refreshing cold milk" should like a great band name. seriously!

[–] booty@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

gimme that TRIPLE thicc shake, I need the maximum possible number of boys in my yard right now

[–] DylanMc6@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 month ago

i'd go with a tempting cheeseburger

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

Steaming Third-Degree Hot Coffee

[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago

you used to be able to get a delightful root beer but now you can only get regular root beer because the SJWs were too offended 😒

[–] fanbois@hexbear.net 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Refreshing Cold Milk Hotel

Bubbly upbeat pop songs, but still horny about Anne Frank.

[–] DylanMc6@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

i just remember that there's this theory in which jeff mangum (and probably his family) went back to save anne frank and adopt her in the family as 'caroline mangum', and then in the 1990s, jeff started dating anne/caroline, now renamed again to astra taylor.

i think that that idea would work as a turtledove-ish story. seriously!

[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago

This isn't clear enough to me, a burgerlander. How many football fields are those prices? If i know that then maybe it will make sense

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Explaining everything as burger to Americans. First explain burger is a sandwich.

Using the taco-is-sandwich loophole to explain how a taquito is a sandwich.

With the cylindrical shape established we can now build a series of tubes made out of burger.

And with it we will finally understand the internet

[–] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

how a taquito is a sandwich.

a taquito isn't a sandwich it's just a flauta with a corn tortilla

[–] thelastaxolotl@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Flautas can use both corn and flour tortillas

[–] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

??? if it's a corn tortilla it's a taquito

[–] thelastaxolotl@hexbear.net 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

you are wrong and idk what else to tell you. This is something I have known as a fact for like forever and if you ask google AI you can guess who it backs up (me) shrug-outta-hecks

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

that goon can put himself feet first into a meatgrinder for his fetid greaseburgers

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

The hamburger being just 1.5x as expensive as the coke or root beer feels outlandish. It feels like the ratio should be at least 4:1.

[–] Meltyheartlove@hexbear.net 5 points 1 month ago

Where beanisbatty kitty-cri-screm

[–] DylanMc6@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 month ago

at this point, since voting is NOT enough, we should all reluctantly use force to stop trump. seriously!