this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

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3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

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-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

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-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

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-Do not Brigade other Communities

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-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

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3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

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9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


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[–] TrackenDaKracken@lemmy.world 91 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I'll have what she's having?

[–] bigmclargehuge@lemmy.zip 68 points 3 days ago (3 children)

I assume the unlimited breadsticks

[–] ladel@feddit.uk 23 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I am the Bone of my Baguette

Dough is my Body and Yeast is my Blood.

I have created over a Thousand Breads,

Unknown to Death,

Nor known to Life.

Have withstood Pain to create many Loaves

Yet those Hands will never hold Anything. So, as I Pray--

Unlimited Breadsticks

[–] Bonje@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago

Fated comment

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[–] generic_computers@lemmy.zip 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

You're putting them in your mouth... right?

[–] 0ops@piefed.zip 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] skankhunt42@lemmy.ca 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] nastronot@lemmy.zip 13 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Would you believe it? Also mouth

[–] Bipauler@sh.itjust.works 9 points 3 days ago

Fuck. Now I want fucking breadsticks

[–] EnsignRoApologist@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago

Stuffed shells with clam sauce?

[–] rslogix89@lemmy.world 42 points 3 days ago (4 children)

“When you're here, you're family”

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 23 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That's why I shit with the stall door open there.

[–] wake@quokk.au 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] n7gifmdn@lemmy.ca 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

What are you doing step-server?

[–] M137@lemmy.today 4 points 2 days ago

And their family is real sick of the loud masturbation.

[–] DrPop@lemmy.world 26 points 3 days ago

Ma'am, this is a Wendy's.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 21 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Which olive garden is it, so that I don't accidentally go there every night for the next few weeks?

[–] Routhinator@startrek.website 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Bipauler@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 days ago

To be fair, that might actually make it worth the prices they're charging nowadays

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 17 points 3 days ago (3 children)

One way to use those endless bread sticks.

[–] tempest@lemmy.ca 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I don't know. Sounds like a yeast infection waiting to happen.

[–] bluesheep@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Turning them breadsticks into sourdough bread, win win

[–] DrSoap@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

You, sir, have a lot of culture.

[–] CalypsoGirl@lemmy.today 6 points 2 days ago (5 children)

Men sure have a lot of misconceptions regarding what things women find pleasurable.

[–] InputZero@lemmy.world 12 points 2 days ago

Perhaps read the community name. That should help explain the situation.

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I replied to a joke with a joke. Who thinks someone would want to masturbate in an Olive Garden with bread sticks and enjoy it?

[–] HCSOThrowaway@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

Some people sure can't miss an opportunity to be misandrist.

How do you even know MeatPilot is a man making a dumb joke in the dumb jokes community and not e.g. a woman or enby making a dumb joke in the dumb jokes community?

[–] Bipauler@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 days ago

Hey! I'll have you know I love sticking breadsticks in my hole! (They are tasty!)

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

You sure have a lot of misconceptions regarding men and general humor.

[–] RagingRobot@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

Breadstick ass to ass unlocked

[–] ccunning@lemmy.world 22 points 3 days ago

🙋‍♂️
Can I go anywhere other than Olive Garden or does it have to be another Olive Garden?

[–] DudeImMacGyver@kbin.earth 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Olive Garden: When you're here yo-hey, what's she doing with that breadstick?

[–] DrSoap@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

More cheese? Just say when.

[–] bigFab@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Cheesus Christ!

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 13 points 3 days ago

The sign said “no shirt, no shoes, no service.” It didn’t say anything about no fucksaw.

[–] daggermoon@piefed.world 5 points 2 days ago
[–] byte21516@leminal.space 11 points 3 days ago

olive garden? This is a Wendy's.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

That's what the breadsticks are for, isn't it?

[–] darthsundhaft@piefed.social 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The pfp looks wildly young. This is oddly timely with the caller that called into EITM this morning who sounded like a middle schooler but was really some 50 year old pickle ball champion.

[–] aSaabD00d@lemmy.today 2 points 2 days ago

I need to get iHeartRadio. I sometimes miss Elliot and crew. Grew up on DC101 bc my dad always listened to it.

[–] hamsamrich@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Hell yeah masturbation! A man’s private time to get er done!

[–] hamsamrich@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

That’s not what they mean by “unlimited breadsticks”!!

[–] 4am@lemmy.zip 3 points 3 days ago

This genius is a big H3 fan so this is probably not a shitpost but an admission

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That AI generated profile picture

[–] restingOface@quokk.au 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I think it's probably real, she's just always funny-looking

https://linktr.ee/awnuhaha

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