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[-] FnordPrefect@hexbear.net 90 points 10 months ago

melon-musk "I promised a driverless car. And technically I have produced, (or will after a sufficiently bad collision), a driverless car."

[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 57 points 10 months ago

Obviously the driver of the other car wanted to kill the cybertruck driver because they were woke and have the mind virus.

[-] DyingOfDeBordom@hexbear.net 52 points 10 months ago

Untrue, the cyber truck has a crumple zone

The driver

[-] Elon_Musk@hexbear.net 49 points 10 months ago

You can't even see the side of the truck that was impacted.

[-] tocopherol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 39 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Nice try Elon, we know the driver was decapitated instantly, we all saw the pics.

[-] booty@hexbear.net 49 points 10 months ago

yes i would like to drive a brick. no improvements in technology from the last hundred years will be keeping ME alive, libs

[-] JohnBrownNote@hexbear.net 23 points 10 months ago

there's a whole bunch of people who don't understand the purpose of crumple zones and actually do think a 70s car is better because the car doesn't break without being hogs about it.

education really letting everyone down

[-] LeopardShepherd@hexbear.net 17 points 10 months ago

This stuff is always hilarious to me. Like you see essentially the entire industry in every country change their designs and materials to what they are now with crumple zones etc with experts in safety and car design. Then some random guy is like uhh yeah it's actually better if they do it old school.

[-] spectre@hexbear.net 11 points 10 months ago

Your also get the anti-seatbelt people

[-] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 8 points 10 months ago

This country was better when they let you drive drunk, like a man.

[-] anonochronomus@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago

If what I know about disasters is correct, your chance of survival increases in relation to your drunkenness.

[-] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 3 points 10 months ago

I was also taught this unfortunate truth. Allegedly it's because drunk people are so unaware they don't tense up during the crash and are essentially ragdolls. Apparently people tensing up in anticipation of the collision (normal reaction when sober) is how many people injure themselves.

[-] supafuzz@hexbear.net 37 points 10 months ago
[-] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 13 points 10 months ago

Remember. No Afrikaans.

[-] sovietknuckles@hexbear.net 37 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Is that the one without airbags?

Edit: It has airbags

[-] Abracadaniel@hexbear.net 51 points 10 months ago

No, that would not be legal to sell. Even backup cameras are a regulatory requirement now.

That's fake news created by hexbear uncritically accepting any anti-bazinga statements as fact.

[-] tocopherol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 31 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Who's this 'hexbear' dude, why was he mistaken about that?

[-] Abracadaniel@hexbear.net 32 points 10 months ago

Someone portrayed a concept render as the real deal, that's all. Concept art often omits the boring practical aspect of car design.

[-] tocopherol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 21 points 10 months ago

I was making a joke but realized it sounded like I was actually asking, but then also realized I did want to know why they thought this so thank you.

[-] Mindfury@hexbear.net 25 points 10 months ago

he goes by ulysses, but he logged off to kill kissinger

[-] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 7 points 10 months ago

He had to go underground to avoid the ex-mossad revenge squad

[-] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 12 points 10 months ago

brace-dark-cowboy

This is The Hexbear

[-] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 42 points 10 months ago

fellas, is it gay to avoid concussive brain injury?

[-] TheAuthor_13@lemm.ee 20 points 10 months ago

Noooo, no no no… it’s not gay to protect your brain… if you’re a pussy! /s JIC

[-] Shinji_Ikari@hexbear.net 41 points 10 months ago

God I hate defending the cyber truck but I'm begging for leftists to learn about concept cars and how they change as they go into production.

Its like trying to argue about guns and calling everything an AK-47 and expecting to be taken seriously.

[-] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 44 points 10 months ago

My AK doesn't have airbag either

[-] JohnBrownNote@hexbear.net 7 points 10 months ago

my AK fits in my waistband

[-] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 30 points 10 months ago

The Virgin Corolla:

Let's the driver survive crashes to see their families (gay)

Affordable (read: for poor people who have financial responsibilities)

Appeals to offline people (cringe)

Has tactile feedback on buttons/knobs for controls (primitive)

Normal transmission (woke)

Creator has never been featured on Rick and Morty or The Big Bang Theory (low IQ)

Safety features tested with "crash test Dummies" (dummy is already in the name)

Standard looking (normies reeee)

The Chad Bazingamobile:

Increases the chances of the owner dying and going to Techno-Valhalla (very cool and straight)

Prohibitively expensive (only for dank meme lords)

Appeals to the finest 9Gag connoisseurs (based)

Has touchscreens everywhere so you have to take your eyes off the road to confirm if you've changed any setting successfully (cyberpunk)

Transmission that will soon be renamed cismission in an update that bricks the truck if you don't download (tradpilled)

Creator has been featured on Rick and Morty AND The Big Bang Theory (high IQ)

Safety features tested on live Neuralink Chimpanzees (ape together strong!) Which have all died from brain trauma (but the logs say it happened way before impact)

Angular, straight lines (this car literally couldn't get any straighter)

[-] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 15 points 10 months ago

Transmission that will soon be renamed cismission in an update that bricks the truck if you don't download (tradpilled)

It’ll just be named to ‘mission’ because they don’t want to dignify the word “cis”

But then they’ll patch it again to just be “ion” because they don’t want the customers feeling gay for using something with “miss” in the name

[-] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 4 points 10 months ago

But then they’ll patch it again to just be “ion” because they don’t want the customers feeling gay for using something with “miss” in the name

ION is the in-universe PMC in Arma, so they get sued by bohemia interactive, causing widespread civil war in the milsim nerd community

[-] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago

Increases the chances of the owner dying and going to Techno-Valhalla (very cool and straight)

See this doesn't work because the corolla can't be the gay soymobile and also being slain by it gets you into valhalla. Ya gotta pick one. I say it stays the gay soymobile and every cybertruck driver killed by one is put down to "skill issue" and gets to whatever the opposite of valhalla is

[-] Mokey@hexbear.net 22 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Auto accident kelly

[-] Dalek@hexbear.net 21 points 10 months ago

I've worked in a few HGVs over the years. They too dont have crumple zones, they get around this by having multiple airbags, A-frames, good seatbelts. Makes me wonder if Musk's truck hasn't?

[-] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 17 points 10 months ago

It's like the cars in Gran Turismo.

[-] marretics@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 10 months ago

Has this car never been crash tested before?

this post was submitted on 01 Jan 2024
168 points (100.0% liked)

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