cross-posted from: https://sopuli.xyz/post/52141910
Probably try to figure out what the hell happened. the majority of the population of earth vanishing would be a bit alarming
this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2026
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Hair color is easier to see from afar. That'd be first.
Well, of course. Do you want a bunch of soulless gingers plaguing the earth?
It'd start out as more jokes, of course. And then over time you'd have to wonder more and more whether any particular joke was serious.
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I’ve lived in a place that was “all white” and they divided themselves up by nationality. Poles, Ukrainians, Slovaks, Czech, Italian.
There would be bars people would avoid because they were harassed for not looking right.
This was in Scranton/Wilkes-Barre at the turn of the millenium. Since then there’s been an influx of Hispanic people and now all the “whites” hate them together.
Also Italians weren't considered white either, in the late 1800s and early 1900s. They were above POC, but barely. They had to "prove their whiteness". Also Irish were predominantly Catholic so fuck them too. Its why a lot went on to become police, to show they weren't "filthy degenerate thieves" and served the community.
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Hair color is too easy to change. White people really value the immutable
Me chuckling with the inability to tan: "Who's white now?"
We already did that one
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Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, "Don't do it!" He said, "Nobody loves me." I said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"
He said, "Yes." I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?" He said, "A Christian." I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me, too! What franchise?" He said, "Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?" He said, "Northern Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region." I said, "Me, too!"
Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912." I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over.
- Emo Philips
I’d miss my wife 🥲
I'd spend the rest of my life looking for my kids.
Me too
We'd all miss their wife.
Check to see if the Asian people are still okay.
A more cynical answer is to buy as much property on the south side of Chicago as possible before the prices skyrocket.
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Probably would go back to discriminating by nationality or culture.
Italian jokes are back on the menu bois!
Irish jokes never left
Okay, aside from the obvious "what the fuck happened to all the people" racist Thanos snap of it all, my real question is this: who is left behind? Because "white" is a made up category. I have 2% African ancestry, do I stay or do I go now? I have some level I don't remember if Asian ancestry, less than 5 percent. I also have higher than average neanderthal DNA. Does that part count as white? They're likely European Neanderthals... Go far enough back, obviously, and all humans are African descended.
Where do we draw the line? Because honestly, if there's some weird racist god out there snapping away people based on their DNA, I need to know the rules so I can make proper arrangements!
Yes, In the early 20th century, Irish and Italians didn't count, so the O'Reillys and Giulianis that people conservative (xenophobic) America would have a sharp surprise.
Was just about to say "You reckon the magical racist thanos snap would finally recognize north african and middle-eastern and azerbaijani and circassian and... groups as white now or still no?"
It is hilarious how accurate this is. Coming from a predominantly white country, our peoole have their own way to separate us in groups and hate each other.
I wouldn't say that POCs wouldn't do the same. It is just the humanity like this. Any big group if people would find ways to be grouped and to hate other groups. Only small groups will be friendly to each other.
Well, once upon a time, keeping tribes small, and being antagonistic towards folk who behave weirdly, were vital in preventing novel infectious disease from running through the population. We've seen recently the risk of a connected global community with COVID-19. The Spanish Flu epidemic also spread widely and killed up to fifty million people.
If your tribe gets an infection and you don't like anyone else much, then it stays in your tribe, and the rest of the population is safe(r).
If we can get past our differences, and develop large enough institutional infrastructure, then centralized disease control uses science and tracking to identify the bug and develop treatment. A good demonstration of this appears in the game Plague INC, in which you play an infectious disease, and watch how the global health sector detects you and responds.
Of course, it doesn't work perfectly, as we've seen, there are vaccine naysayers. There were some during the 1918–1920 flu pandemic, as well. And as we've seen with the AIDS/HIV pandemic, if the initial batch of victims are not liked much, it can delay response by the scientific community. But large health institutions improve lifespan and quality of life overall.
Well, you ever heard about Rwanda? We all do the same.
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I can already hear this world's Charlie Kirk claiming brown eyed people are responsible for 9001% of the violent crimes.
I actually haven't heard much from him lately
Yeah so basically he had this procedure done that drained all the toxicity out of his personality just over a year ago and ever since then he has become the very model of "the only good kind of fascist". Incredible growth. I wish all fascists could improve as people in the exact same way he did.
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Grieve my black friends
Dude, the grieving process just gets prolonged because of how hard it is to make new friends as an adult. Like, great, now I'm sad AND lonely.
Find jobs for all the cops?
In America, they would not have very long before they started having to forage for food.
A majorly significant portion of the workforce for agriculture are non-white.
There may be a few locations that can maintain business as usual, but the world is going to collapse, and it's not a question of if it's a question of when, and I'm guessing for most people that will be less than 30 days.
Of course I won't be there to see it, I will have been raptured along with the rest of everyone, so best of luck.
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Only white people.
Asia: empty
Africa: empty
Maybe southern Europe also empty
Does this fix climate change?
No, we'll just consume more.
We're doing a lot of bullshit. Research shows we could maintain our effective lifestyle while cutting consumption by up to 60%
No, because 10% of richest people on Earth (majorly Western Bloc, including Europe) are responsible for 50-66% of global emissions.
For example:
Ethiopian is responsible for 0.14 tonnes of CO2 emissions yearly on average.
A Swede on average is responsible for 3.43 tonnes of emissions.
An American is responsible for 13.83 tonnes.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_carbon_dioxide_emissions_per_capita
The issue isn't overpopulation, not at all, but that we have a bunch of countries with hyperconsumerist economy, a car in every household, high electricity usage, accessible red meat, air-conditioning etc.
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And covering women’s left hands for being too sexy?
Had my wife look for this exact comment. Was going to have her post this if no one else had.
^He^ ^thinks^ ^he's^ ^so^ ^clever.^ ^A^ ^Stormlight^ ^Archive^ ^reference,^ ^how^ ^original.^
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Nah, more realistically they'll just went back to say Italians aren't really white, then irish people and so on.
Funny how everyone thinks only white people are xenophobic and racist.
Well, in this hypothetical example only white people exist, so of course they will be assholes to other white people.
Business days? Do some folks think racism takes the weekends off?
if they throw a huge party on Saturday and gotta sleep off the hangover all Sunday, then yes
We do that already by hair color. Like, did you know red heads don’t have any soul? Just saying.
We still doing blonde jokes? I feel like I haven't seen one since Miss South Carolina became the epitome of them.
This is confusing. The are more than "white" and "black". If it's only white people left, does that mean anyone that's not of pure European descent is also gone? Is there a fraction that's allowable? 3/5ths?
We'd be looking at a potential extinction-level event for Homo Sapiens, in any case. It would be hard to come back from that.
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