this post was submitted on 10 Mar 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] MrNesser@lemmy.world 76 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Do a full year gradually reduce the frequency then start ramping up with the reveal on Christmas day when they open presents with cans of beans in them.

[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 18 points 1 month ago

I like this long term prank... Solves Xmas challenges, too (sorta - it's a bit shitty)

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@piefed.world 68 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I think Lemmy has contracted the beans virus a few times.

[–] hansolo@lemmy.today 22 points 1 month ago

The antibeanotics never seem to clear it up.

[–] pruwybn@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 1 month ago

Yeah we've bean there.

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[–] Washedupcynic@lemmy.ca 57 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] TheColonel@reddthat.com 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

They’re also just gross.

I don’t remember how it happened but I wound up with one can of Goya and one can of (I think) Hanover Butter Beans.

The Goya beans were slimy, smushed, having fewer and overall shitty beans compared to the other brand.

So fuck Goya for everything you said but also fuck them for having a shit ass product.

[–] Tempus_Fugit@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

Yup, came here to say this.

[–] Ryanmiller70@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 month ago

I still remember when that happened. I worked at a grocery store at the time and so many MAGA came and bought so much Goya by the case. Never saw them by those ever again even when they did get beans (many of them were regulars and it was a small store so there was only ever 1 cashier on duty at any time unless it got busy).

[–] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 30 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Oh, hey, the shithead who caused me to boycott Goya apparently got the boot last year. Too bad Goya waited five too many years; I'll be keeping my business elsewhere indefinitely.

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

To be fair, from that article:

At the time, the nine-person board was in favor of removing Unanue from the company entirely, but the regulations of the family-owned business, founded in 1936 by Prudencio Unanue Ortiz — Robert Unanue’s grandfather — would not allow it, as noted by the New York Post.

Though shitty company policies are also a good reason to boycott a company.

[–] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Extremely valid point, and I forgot to bring this up: I read the NYP article (god help me), and I could find no evidence of that claim (which surprises me NJ.com cited it for that). In fact, there's even counterevidence within the article:

Some Goya owners have also asked the board to present a motion to remove Unanue as CEO because he’s been using the company to promote his political views, sources said.

“More than 50 percent of the shareholders do not want Bob to be the CEO,” a Goya source said. “All these political statements that Bob is making is dangerous for the company and for us personally as owners,” this person added.

“It will hurt the Unanue name and company if he continues,” a second Goya source and shareholder said. “He should be thrown out as CEO. I think it’s really hurting us.”

In an interview with The Post last week leading up to Friday’s vote, Unanue acknowledged that his job may be on the line.

“I’m attacked by my own family” he said. “I could be fired tomorrow … whatever. It’s touch and go.”

As The Post exclusively reported last year, Unanue narrowly escaped losing his job when he nixed an effort to sell a minority stake in the company to a private equity investor that would have brought in a non-family member CEO for the first time in the company’s 85-year history.

It's still possible that there's some other source describing this alleged restriction, but I don't know of it.

[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago

I mean, not using a corruptible president is just leaving money on the table. It’s not like-

“…his vocal support of President Donald Trump”

I hope he develops a debilitating gambling addiction so he might one day experience hardship again.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The bean virus spreads quickly through Lemmy. Beware.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] maplesaga@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

Somebody get me another god damn John Mcafee.

[–] Tempus_Fugit@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] alt_xa_23@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I had some friends in high school who thought it was really funny to leave loaves of bread in peoples' mailboxes. When one guy asked about it, they told him it was from the government.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

now all they need is some of that gubbahmint cheese to make a badass grilled cheese.

[–] ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 5 points 1 month ago

I would legit buy that brick-o'-cheese right now if I could find it in a store

[–] NottaLottaOcelot@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 month ago

I love pranks like this - completely off the wall, nobody gets hurt

[–] DudeImMacGyver@kbin.earth 15 points 1 month ago (30 children)
[–] finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Did you know uncooked kidney beans are toxic and can cause severe illness if consumed raw, but cooking them properly makes them safe to eat? (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Some people may know the baby Lima Bean better by its colloquial name, the Butter Bean! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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[–] TheAsianDonKnots@lemmy.zip 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Goya, the company that paid Trump to shill those shitty beans in the Oval Office. Our world has become a constant Onion headline.

[–] fushuan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 month ago

Paying a courier to deliver a single can of beans isn't that far either if you think about it.

[–] Marthirial@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

They know it is coming from OP but keep the ruse going to avoid crushing what they consider OPs only source of self gratification and pleasure going on in OPs otherwise unremarkable life.

[–] lovely_reader@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah, I've heard people have to resort to some crazy stuff once porn stops working for them

[–] jdr@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 month ago

Linux isn't that bad

[–] kate@lemmy.uhhoh.com 14 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] raven@piefed.world 12 points 1 month ago

This sounds fun. 😂

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 month ago

I need the bean virus

[–] otter@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Brushing is an actual scam / misleading practice, which involves receiving items you didn't order

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brushing_(e-commerce)

It doesn't usually happen with beans

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 month ago

TIL. I got an unexplained bidet addressed to me once, and concluded my spouse was trying to drop a hint.

[–] Magnum@infosec.pub 4 points 1 month ago
[–] OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I love beans, this would be a very useful prank if someone did it to me

[–] lovely_reader@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Looks like Brer Rabbit really hates beans you guys

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[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago

They're actually smart to be wary of computer viruses. It just seems mean to take advantage of their ignorance of it like that, unless they're assholes and deserve it.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

this is the exact kind of prank i'd pull on my family except they're all logged into the same accounts i am. and i'm too broke to afford a second doordash.

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