2.5 centimeters of toothpaste is like a lot, the dude is foaming like crazy
this post was submitted on 20 Feb 2026
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Chapotraphouse
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Just raises questions about the toothbrush.
Maybe seizing the toothbrushes will be necessary after all.
As much as I'd love to believe this screenshot of uncredited text, this is how I knew it was all fake. No British person cares that much about brushing their teeth
There's interviews with his butler where the butler talks about the toothpaste and also being called into his office in order to throw out one piece of paper into a paperbasket next to the desk.
Skepticism is only worth anything if you follow it up with research and this shit is pretty easy to look into. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/reports/a38743898/prince-charles-doesnt-squeeze-out-his-own-toothpaste/
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custom velvet toilet paper
pause. wtf does that even mean? is he wiping his ass with fucking fabric? is he just regularly annihilating plumbing everywhere he shits or something? i don't understand.
Probably extra soft toilet paper kept away from us because if we knew there more than one kind of softness, we'd never stop killing for it
Kinda misleading, Kleenex Velvet is the brand name and it's not sold in some countries so he has to travel with it
that's a brand name? wild
Kleenex is basically synonymous with tissue paper in the US but I've never heard of them selling toilet paper before.
Really? Over here (Aus) they're known for both. There is a Kleenex product for every orifice!
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He's got a dude whose job it is to emboss the royal monogram on every square of what's otherwise just Charmin 2 ply.
They call him the ~~Lord of the Privy Chamber~~
Edit - Even better! A Groom of the Stool
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must have servants to launder the royal shit rags, what decadence
look at my divinely appointed ruler dawg I'm going to starve
Sick fit
Silly hats only
imagine trying to explain to any indigenous group on turtle island or in africa that the soulless mayoids that are about to invade, genocide, and enslave them are exclusively ruled by petulant children wearing silly clothes and wigs and funny hats.
There is actually a tribe in the Amazon that considers him some sort of god of fertility. There's a docuseries about it.
Edit: googled it and found the cargo cult "the prince Philip movement". Probably the ones I was thinking of, so not a tribe but a part of one.
that was his dad, i wonder what they're up to now the old lich is dead
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I think my mom had the same purple dress when she was pregnant.
Sometimes I have a fantasy of becoming POTUS and demanding the UK giving me the crown jewels as an act of fealty. Then I leverage the jewels to sweeten some trade deal with India. It usually ends with me holding up the hope diamond that shines across a cricket stadium as I yell the hindi equivalent of "Ich bin ein Berliner".
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Charles is inbred right? This is the kind of shit inbred monarchs have always done.
Imagine beging a monarchist. Peroid.
Pretty cringe.
alright am i alone in thinking the 2.5 centimeters is the weirdest part? not even the butler, the SHEER AMOUNT OF TOOTHPASTE
wait, this isn't a joke post?
you made me doubt it and i looked and yes, he really does want these things. the toothpaste centimeter thing is because he wants exactly an inch of toothpaste out of a crested silver dispenser, which translates to 2.54cm. the claims come from Omid Scobie's book "Endgame: Inside the Royal Family and the Monarchy’s Fight For Survival"
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i don't think the monarchy is gonna make it. queen elizabeth lived so damn long from ww2 to now-ish. i can imagine a certain amount of inertia for legitimacy when the monarch is some ancient little old lady in pastel colors with corgis.
but suddenly, the new monarch is this fuckin' inbred guy who has been a public doofus since always. that has got to move the needle to where more people are like, "wait, how much is wasted on this asshole?"
but suddenly, the new monarch is this fuckin' inbred guy
guy who is completely unfamiliar with monarchy
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I myself have a plush isopod and that's never impacted my work but the rest is ridiculous
If i could afford Royalty Level toilet paper I'd probably take it with me as well. Probably hard to go back
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Like that this comments section isn't filled with his defenders claiming this extreme privilege is just undiagnosed autism and criticizing it is ableism like I've seen when this is posted elsewhere.
I think that's more insulting to autistic people than making fun of a Prince for being a spoiled adult brat who throws temper tantrums. Autistic people arent that demanding and if someone was, they would still need to be rich and privileged enough to make those impositions
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lmao that's incredible. I love when people use woke talking points to defend the most reactionary people on the planet, it's genuinely hilarious
Bruh what
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None of this is surprising. Royals were always weird neurotic pussies
You don't understand, he forced the media to use the full government name instead of "prince Andrew"
nice i hope his life sucks til he dies
We need an emoji of the baby from Dinosaurs
this guy ain’t cutting it
sometimes i wonder just how insufferable i would be had i grown up in the royal family
...
Brother, you need your butler to put toothpaste on the brush? That isn't being pampered, that's being LAZY. And I should know since I'm a lazy guy myself, c'mon man!
It's giving Pŭyí, as the youth say these days
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