this post was submitted on 06 Feb 2026
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top 37 comments
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[–] ExLisper@lemmy.curiana.net 13 points 17 hours ago

Ski jumping is the dumbest sport out there. There are points for style which is arbitrary and already takes it down couple of levels compared with real sports. Weight is super important so the 'athletes' are all starving all the time. Wind has a big influence so they have to guess when gust will happen but since it changer during the day judges will arbitrarily change the length of runway at different points of the competition. It's barely fair. And on top of that the suit has such a huge influence that the jumpers can't even touch it after they were certified. Like they literally can't touch the suit they are wearing because just changing how it adjust to the body will affect the score. And now we learned that adding 1cm to the length of the suit have such a big influence that they will inject stuff in their dicks to get an advantage. This 'sport' is more about starving yourself, having luck and finding ways to cheat the rules then it is about athleticism.

[–] MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world 27 points 22 hours ago (5 children)

Go back to OLD old Olympics. Everyone naked

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 3 points 10 hours ago

Especially the judges and spectators

[–] assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world 7 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (1 children)

The cheating countries now begin selecting competitors with the largest genitals for greatest lift effect.

[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 10 points 18 hours ago

That is just how the olympics and pro sports works.

95% training 5% finding the mutants

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 18 hours ago

Would make the Winter Olympics quite challenging!

[–] Pringles@sopuli.xyz 3 points 20 hours ago
[–] 4am@lemmy.zip 3 points 22 hours ago

They’ll have to make a new rule banning the batwing

[–] 474D@lemmy.world 30 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ok but what if a guy just has a massive hog, should he get into this sport early?

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 32 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Apparently some countries are now testing boys in puberty with a method of determining just how large their penis will become. They then train those with the largest hog potential on how to ski jump

[–] 4am@lemmy.zip 19 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

This sounds like hugenics to me

[–] Noodle07@lemmy.world 13 points 21 hours ago (1 children)
[–] MintyFresh@lemmy.world 2 points 10 hours ago
[–] Saapas@piefed.zip 27 points 1 day ago

Just  your standard penis inspection day

[–] mastertigurius@lemmy.world 10 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

"Hog potential" should go on the report card, next to attendance and teacher's comments.

[–] PhoenixDog@lemmy.world 6 points 23 hours ago

Your child failed the Hog Potential portion of the exam.

"But she doesn't have a hog.."

That's why she failed, sir.

[–] TribblesBestFriend@startrek.website 16 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

There’s an easy fix for that … make the suit crotch less but no one want to ear the truth

[–] Klear@quokk.au 2 points 17 hours ago

More like they don't want to eye it.

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 21 points 1 day ago (3 children)
[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 6 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Imagine injecting stuff into your penis.

Done! What's next?

[–] treeko@lemmy.world 2 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Now imagine injecting penis into Winter Olympics ski jumpers

[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 2 points 21 hours ago

Pfffft, way ahead of you.

[–] gustofwind@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I’d be ok with this if it was guaranteed their penises became infected and required amputation

Can only do it once so make it count

[–] Gork@sopuli.xyz 6 points 1 day ago

The ol' Elon, as it's traditionally called.

[–] foodandart@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 day ago

That's stupid. Dudes just need to use a penis pump the week they get fitted for the suit.

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 9 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

Just enforce a pp size of exactly 2cm, the staff will check you just before the jump & either cut or fluff you to specification.

... but while on subject - since they use (size regulated) skis as part of the equipment, why don't they allow for like (size regulated) beaver tail buttplugs that the athletes would manoeuvre to their advantage (gliding & prolonging the jump, tho the best amongst them would actually flap it vigorously for extra lift).

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

In some cases of hernia, the patient experiences enlargement of testicles. Will they benefit in this sport?

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

research shows that the only advantage is with length and girth of the penis shaft. Testicles do not play a significant part

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago
[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 1 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Um... That part is concave so adding material (area) decreases circumference.

[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 3 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Suit circumference I think means "of the entire suit". Its a weird way to say it but in the context they're using it, it makes sense.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 1 points 7 hours ago

The entire suit is 3D, in which case it makes more sense to talk about surface area, but that is measured in cm². The "circumference" must apply to the "sail" shadow.

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Remember the good old days when guys would shove socks into their underwear and girls would shove them into their bras?

[–] pennomi@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I think you mean the good old days when there was a bespoke piece of clothing specifically for that purpose: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Codpiece

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 4 points 20 hours ago

I love how the codpiece is not the weird part of this painting