this post was submitted on 17 May 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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[–] QuillcrestFalconer@hexbear.net 104 points 1 year ago (2 children)

China giving American students free/very cheap education would be very cool and funny

[–] Flyberius@hexbear.net 96 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

My mum used to tell me all these borderline problematic fake confucius sayings when I was growing up.

Things like "Go to bed with an itchy bum, wake up with a smelly finger".

I was being taken round a Confucian temple in Yunnan in March and told some of them to our guide, who thought they were absolutely hilarious. Anyway, stupid anecdote.

[–] FishLake@lemmygrad.ml 62 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I kinda love that you went to a place of worship and cracked jokes about that religion and still killed it. That’s a level of charisma a lot of us will never attain.

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[–] The_Jewish_Cuban@hexbear.net 58 points 1 year ago

My friend also got a kick out of those. Not a stupid story lol

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 89 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Steal our research

Liberals don't understand how science works, do they?

[–] KoboldKomrade@hexbear.net 59 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Liberals worship of IP might cause their downfall faster then anything.

[–] jackmarxist@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago

It is lol. Apparently restricting use of technology makes the progress towards newer better tech slower.

[–] Des@hexbear.net 57 points 1 year ago (1 children)

it works like a 4x strategy game duh

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 49 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sneaky CCP agents stealing our science points

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[–] dkr567@hexbear.net 52 points 1 year ago

They really don't have a single clue how R&D works and the amount of collaboration("stealing" according to libshits) there are.

[–] reaper_cushions@hexbear.net 50 points 1 year ago

Liberals cannot comprehend anything that does not abide by the logic of capitalist property relations.

[–] emizeko@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

it's white supremacist brainworms, they cannot conceive of the untermensch having already surpassed them

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[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 75 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Steal our research

Oh no they're gonna steal the secrets of the flavor-blasted dorito

[–] DyingOfDeBordom@hexbear.net 38 points 1 year ago

The secret: .

spoilerYou blast them with flavor

[–] Gucci_Minh@hexbear.net 35 points 1 year ago

The Takis formula has been compromised, billions must lime.

[–] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago

CCP agents have infiltrated the US and stole the secret recipe for fortune cookies! Such powerful divination magic in the hands of China will spell the end of Western civilization

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[–] BestBouclettes@jlai.lu 71 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Pretty fucking funny considering Confucius is like the father of Conservatism. The OG "it was better before".

[–] Frank@hexbear.net 53 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Seriously why Confucious? He invented reaction before there was anything to react to.

[–] nothx@hexbear.net 71 points 1 year ago

CCP is actually the Chinese Confucius Party.

[–] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 65 points 1 year ago

Steal our research

[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 57 points 1 year ago (1 children)

China is trying to steal our intellectual property by... educating our youth?

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago

The same claim was made when China was sending students here, which was then also wrong, which pretty much leaves it pretty open that if it involves both china and academia in some way you start at "they're stealing our research" and work yourself backwards into whatever it actually is china is doing

[–] Umechan@hexbear.net 53 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Isn't this the same as what Israel has been doing with Birthright?

[–] btfod@hexbear.net 46 points 1 year ago

It's ok if other fascists do it

[–] Greenleaf@hexbear.net 44 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Birthright is more like a timeshare sales presentation - they’re trying to sell Jewish kids on moving there. This is more like “getting people exposed to other cultures is good, maybe Americans will be way less maniacal towards us if they just come over here and see how we’re all just people”.

[–] huf@hexbear.net 36 points 1 year ago

yep, birthright is a 10 day tour of israel where they talk about arabs the way people talk about the romani back home. and then they tell you it's your duty to move to israel and serve in the IDF. and then they get angry at you when you go ????? at them.

this was my experience in 2004.

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[–] CliffordBigRedDog@hexbear.net 42 points 1 year ago

They gonna teach Americans the six arts: Rites, Music, Archery, Chariotry, Calligraphy, Mathematics

[–] theposterformerlyknownasgood@hexbear.net 40 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Oh no. They'll introduce American youth to the concept of filial piety. We're all fucked. An entire generation loyal to boomers

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[–] Lerios@hexbear.net 40 points 1 year ago

i genuinely do not have a single higher goal as an academic than being able to conduct at least some of my research in china (well, aside from stopping climate change, but lets be real i have by far the best chance of doing that there anyway). xi please confucinize me powercry-1 xi-plz

[–] Tankiedesantski@hexbear.net 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"You'll teach my kids hard work and fillial piety over my cold dead body!"

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 28 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Hardcore patriarchy also. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_Obediences_and_Four_Virtues

Christofascists would love Confucius if they actually bothered to read him. The rules it lays out are not hugely different to the rules the christian church laid out.

They'd hate this part but they also hate it in christianity and pretend "be good to others" and "feed the poor" doesn't exist.

[–] MineDayOff@hexbear.net 35 points 1 year ago
[–] lil_tank@lemmygrad.ml 35 points 1 year ago

Mfers be like "Chyna has no soft power"

[–] Red_sun_in_the_sky@lemmy.ml 33 points 1 year ago

CHINA ATTEMPTING TO RESURRECT STALIN AND HIS SPOON IN THEIR NEW CONFUCIAN CENTERS TO TAKE YOUR BURGERS. STOP THE INFLUENCE. NOW🚫🚫🚫

[–] frauddogg@lemmygrad.ml 33 points 1 year ago

Oh my god that's based; lucky-assed kids

[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 31 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

The person on the right is giving me elementary school flashbacks with her gleeful liar's expression. She looks like a rich 10 year old in the middle of blackmailing the maid. That's the most I'll-tell-teacher ass face I've ever seen on an adult human being

Hey, quick question: is there any reason that society in America is in a condition that would make living in China seem appealing? Seems like if it wasn't, then the kids wouldn't want to go. Would love to know your thoughts on this.

[–] khizuo@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

God I miss China. Haven’t gone back since before the pandemic, which was also before I became a communist.

[–] volcel_olive_oil@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago

those poor students are gonna have all their research sucked out by the cock milking machine, infecting them with confusionism

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago

Just imagine all the research they're going to steal from our 10-year-olds. Think of the damage they'll do with the top 5 fortnite strategies or all the hot tiktok dances!

[–] the_itsb@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago

How do I sign my kid up?!?

[–] xkyfal18@lemmygrad.ml 21 points 1 year ago

Based China creating new comrades

[–] culpritus@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
[–] DamarcusArt@lemmygrad.ml 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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