Link to the πΌ Hexbear Matrix Chat https://matrix.to/#/#Hexbear:matrix.org 
Chapotraphouse
Banned? DM Wmill to appeal.
No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
Slop posts go in c/slop. Don't post low-hanging fruit here.
it is august 30 and stalin saved the world from fascism
What's the name of the Yenomi Park emoji? i tried 'Yenomi', 'Park', 'Bad', 'country' keywords no luck
When I cook buffalo wings, I like to imagine myself as a 45 year old loser line cook in a small southern time around the 1970's. I'm a drunk, loser, alcoholic until one day I get a knock on the door. Apparently I have a half-black son who's 14. His mom and I had a brief fling in college but do my small town upbringing and maladjusted racial tension, it didn't work out. After agreeing to take care of him, I learn that he has dreams of opening up a restaurant of his own. Our relationship is rocky but we find common ground when I realize that his mom kept one of my old buffalo chicken wing recipes.
When I make him wings, I can see that he remembers his mom. For the first time since we've met, he thanks me with something resembling genuine happiness. This drives a creative spark in me that leads me dream of larger things than being a line cook. I get sober, and start applying for culinary schools. However, due the effects of racism, things don't always work out. My life ends in a tragedy when I defend my son from being accosted only to be pushed into the path of an oncoming car.
I die ultimately unfulfilled but having seen a glimpse of something greater. Years later, my son opens a small restaurant and uses the same recipe I taught him all those years ago. He visits my grave and can't quite call me dad. But the feelings are present. As he walks away from my grave, we can see that he left a photo of him and his mom together years before her death. They're smiling and enjoying the wings. Even though I was such small part of his life, in some way, I was still there. A reflection of my self in another person, even if we've never met.
I'm South East Asian so I don't think this racist but I'm willing to do some self-crit. It just helps the wings taste better. Gotta get in the mood ya know?
Enter night, exit light
We're off to Never-never Land
Lars is a massive MJ fan
Seeing mega-only posters comment on other posts is kinda like seeing your teacher down the shops
The secret to unlimited hexbear updoots is to write two paragraphs, the first agreeing with the comment/post you're replying to and the other with a surprise dunk.
If someone agrees with you, they'll upbear and move on. If someone disagrees, they'll hate read until they get to the dunk and then upbear because of sub[not sexual]version.
My friends, I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about outdoor cats. All right, this is how I feel about outdoor cats:
To all you cumtown enjoyers.
Why don't you follow your leader and shit yourself on live television while wearing white linen pants and then refuse to wipe. Nerds.
But Ian is the leader
Bert Chintus (2022)


Seems legit
"Leftists" will be writing with their right hands and not realize they're the problem 
As the One True Leftist, I exclusively drive on the left side of the road.
No, I'm not Br*tish
Oh thank god you would have started some shit if you didn't write the last part
I tried out that truck driving simulator game that seems really popular, and it's pretty fun, but how the hell do real truck drivers learn to park? It's so goddamn hard to do in 1st person view
when i'm truckin' irl i just switch to third person view
Medieval chefs really did throw milk and honey into everything and anything
That's the only thing they had in the medieval ages. French people went fucking crazy and made 80324023 types of cheese for each day of the week just from milk.
Chef *tastes soil* hmm u kno what this needs?
Just made coffee. About to watch a 3h deep dive into the new 40k Ork Codex by some tournament nerds.


Iran is gonna steamroll this war
Imagine having to smile awkwardly the day before you die because some dweeb keeps making pop culture references from before you were born.
Hello comrades, I logged out and touched grass for a week, did I miss anything? I was on an island and had almost zero contact with the outside world
same old ever ending cycle of life and death as usual. That trip sounds great, i'm jealous. what was your fav part?
I think everything is going pretty well, no need to investigate further. 
I had a nice matcha latte this morning then got some on my white t shirt 
Wednesday I went for break early because i forgot my caffeine at home. Got a drive thru coffee, still took longer than my break was supposed to be, spilled it as soon as i got back to the jobsite.
I feel your pain
Yours is definitely worse than mine, im so sorry 
I somehow survived but now that i think about it i left early that day
Such is the lot of man 
i finished fire emblem awakening and it was pretty good, also the US navy is running out of money so they are cutting the sailors paychecks https://hexbear.net/comment/7420693
Always pay ur guys
I think there should be a corollary to that for china: hey china, pay someone else's guys
Average conversation overheard at the coffee shop in so-called "America":
He eats a whole pizza and a bottle of soda at 2 o'clock everyday. That's all he eats all day. He went in the hospital once for a nutritionial deficiency.
Why release a new GTA when you can't even parody the IRL dialogue of the US
Americans will eat a whole bottle of soda and convince themselves it's part of their daily 2 fruit and 5 veggies rdi
Would it be cool if I stole this for background dialogue for a movie I will probably never make?
if you made your own (im sure they dont) i feel like you could have a fairly solid diet putting a heap of veg on a thin crust.
the pizza-only man could be a beast
Or like, adding a bunch of custom toppings to a frozen thin crust pizza. I used to do that with cheapo taco pizza, I'd add sliced peppers and diced onion and crushed beans and tomato pieces and then add lettuce after cooking, really just load it up with stuff.
I don't eat cheese anymore so I haven't done that for a while, but I could totally make my own maybe...
add lettuce after cooking
still within the realm of relatively normal pizza spinach & kale are excellent and cook way down, you could heap them 5cm high off the crust and after baking it'd look like an average pizza
Ooh I had a cream spinach thing once that was really good, I bet that would go great on pizza. Maybe with artichoke...