this post was submitted on 11 May 2026
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Pastor Mark Burns, the president's informal "spiritual advisor," wants to make one thing very clear about the extremely tall gold statue of Donald Trump that was officially dedicated last week in Doral, Miami. "Let me be clear: this is not a golden calf. We worship the Lord Jesus Christ and Him alone," he wrote on Twitter.

He's technically right, just as Rene Magritte was technically right that his painting of a pipe was not actually a pipe. In the most literal sense, the statue of Trump, which is named "Don Colossus" is not a golden calf.

Despite the president calling it "The Real Deal - GOLD," on Truth Social, the statue is not made of gold. Unlike the golden calf, which was made from melting the jewelry of the Egyptians, the Trump statue is not actually made of solid gold. "Don Colossus" is cast in bronze and covered in gold leaf, making it much, much less valuable. It is also obviously not a calf, as calves are baby cows, and the statue is certainly not a baby cow.

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[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 114 points 3 months ago (6 children)

It's still definitely an idol, though.

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 29 points 3 months ago

tiny dick and all.

[–] frunch@lemmy.world 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Probably the most American Idol to date

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[–] mPony@lemmy.world 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)

with a golden calf just above each golden ankle

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[–] Australis13@fedia.io 84 points 3 months ago (3 children)

I'd like to ask Pastor Burns if he's read the book of Daniel, particularly chapters 3 and 4.

God struck Nebuchadnezzar (who likewise had a golden statue built for his entire kingdom to workship) with madness for 7 years for his pride.

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 62 points 3 months ago (2 children)

We're having madness right now.

[–] Australis13@fedia.io 31 points 3 months ago (2 children)

True, but in Nebuchadnezzar's case his kingdom was taken from him for those 7 years...

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 36 points 3 months ago (1 children)

If only we could be so fortunate.

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

A monkey paw finger curls

Hey look, the brits are coming again!

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[–] Murse@slrpnk.net 66 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Sometimes I wish God was real, so we'd get to see him swoop in and smite these fucking hypocrites.

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

if god isn't real it is up to us to make the world a just god would make.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.cafe 8 points 3 months ago

I think that every time one of these psychos assumes room temperature. Upon hearing of their death, I'd love the satisfaction of imagining their reaction upon entering Hell for the eternity of fiery torture that we've been promised.

But alas, it's all a fairy tale, as real as Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy.

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[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.cafe 43 points 3 months ago (3 children)

the statue is certainly not a baby cow.

No, it's a giant pig.

[–] BeardededSquidward@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Now, be nicer to pigs, they're intelligent, capable of empathy. It's actually a giant pile of gold leafed shit.

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[–] SuiXi3D@fedia.io 37 points 3 months ago

…if you feel the need to let everyone know how much the golden idol isn’t a golden idol, perhaps you’ve forgotten what an idol is and why your religion speaks against them.

[–] frunch@lemmy.world 30 points 3 months ago (1 children)

"Let me be clear: this is not a golden calf. We worship the Lord Jesus Christ and Him alone,"

Which is why they erected a giant golden statue of the president of the United States. Makes perfect sense!

[–] Mirshe@lemmy.world 19 points 3 months ago

And blessed it, and have repeatedly said that Trump is either blessed by God, or God's divine instrument.

But this isn't idolatry.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 28 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

It's not a golden calf

No. It's a golden pig-like thing that is fatter and smellier than a pig.

But also: If they worship Jesus Christ, and Jesus Christ alone that's pretty weird. What about God and the Holy Spirit? Did this pastor even go to seminary school?

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[–] Akh@lemmy.world 24 points 3 months ago (2 children)

This “church” wouldn’t know Christ if the Christ walked up to them and said to love their neighbors as Christ loved them.

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 12 points 3 months ago (2 children)

They would know Christ: they would be in the front row yelling for another crucifixion

[–] Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Indeed: most of present day America, especially the far-right, would be incredibly hostile towards a middle eastern guy preaching a philosophy of peace and equality and who was openly against the "money lenders".

[–] Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

If the real Christ came back, they'd call him a lunatic

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[–] lovingisliving@anarchist.nexus 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

A gold plated statue is really on the nose for this con artist.

[–] BeigeAgenda@lemmy.ca 11 points 3 months ago

I am sure it's the thinnest gold coating possible, a lettuce head will last longer than the coating.

[–] BucketBong@p.hobo.social 19 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 22 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Baphomet is much better done

[–] FreddiesLantern@leminal.space 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Not only that, a much better character to have a statue of.

[–] BucketBong@p.hobo.social 21 points 3 months ago

And way safer around those children

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One is a statue of a cruel, merciless, sinful being that kills for fun. The other is Baphomet.

[–] lechekaflan@lemmy.world 19 points 3 months ago (8 children)

Do those bastards not see what can happen to despots?

[–] auntieclokwise@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)
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[–] Photonic@lemmy.world 16 points 3 months ago (4 children)

Are you sure he is not a baby cow though? When I hear him speak all I hear is the exact same whiny mooing sound a calf makes.

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[–] normalentrance@lemmy.zip 16 points 3 months ago (4 children)

and God later sent a plague upon the people for their idolatry.

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[–] tomiant@piefed.social 15 points 3 months ago (3 children)

"The church has investigated the claims about rampant pedophilia"

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[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago (1 children)

These people love vice signalling. This is clearly a giant golden idol they worship. They love their pedo prince so much because he's all the vices.

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[–] HollowedFleshwalker@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago

Why would the idol-like statue, made for a person worshiped by his followers who are part of a group with cult-like tendencies, be considered an idol?

[–] BenLeMan@lemmy.world 11 points 3 months ago

We are witnessing Olympic levels of mental gymnastics here.

[–] SnarkoPolo@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

How long before he's charging admission just as far as the statue, so MAGAs can kneel to it?

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[–] NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It is also obviously not a calf, as calves are baby cows, and the statue is certainly not a baby cow.

Right...bcz it's a statue of a large cow.

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[–] Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 3 months ago

It's obviously meant to be an homage to medical doctors.

[–] Prunebutt@slrpnk.net 9 points 3 months ago

My 'Not a golden idol' shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.

[–] Onsotumenh@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

My first thought went to this:

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.cafe 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

If it walks like a duck, and talks like a duck, it's a golden idol.

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[–] melsaskca@lemmy.ca 7 points 3 months ago

I can't wait until the righteous americans eventually tear all of that shit down just like the people did with Saddam.

[–] cley_faye@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's not an idol, it's just a gold-looking representation of something a large group of people fervently honor and pray to, and according to their own chit-chat, hold in higher respect than jesus or god. And nothing more.

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[–] MousePotatoDoesStuff@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

What would Moses do?

Throw the idol into a fire, I guess.

The statue, too.

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[–] Mulligrubs@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

This statue is a PERFECT representation of Trumpism, he can't resist revealing himself by the art he chooses. Reminds me of Mussolini.

(caption: a photo of the massive Mussolini head staring down a public square)

I think it's because these personalities surround themselves with sycophants, and this leads to them being isolated and unaware of their own ridiculousness. A universal truth across the centuries.

Ye shall know them by their fruits. ~Matthew 7:16

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