this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] hansolo@lemmy.today 23 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I love this idea, but whew, where I grew up this would have gotten someone shot.

[–] me_myself_and_I@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

America Land of the Free!

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 3 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Hobos or methheads? Hobo methheads?

[–] zjti8eit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

I have never seen a hobo with a gun

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 1 points 6 hours ago

But have you seen Hobo with a Shotgun?

[–] hansolo@lemmy.today 2 points 11 hours ago

Rednecks. They would have started shooting at the orb, way before the gorilla showed up.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

rednecks, probably

(so, methheads)

[–] LillyPip@lemmy.ca 7 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago)

Was this in the US? Sounds like a good way to be shot, scaring people and looking like you’re not human.

In other countries, fair play.

[–] Francislewwis@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago

High school really was just people inventing side quests for no reason 💀

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 59 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Damn rich kids. Gorilla suits aren't cheap!

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 24 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Back in my day we had to settle for Lemur suits and we were happy.

[–] Jtee@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

All I have are these marmoset pajamas

[–] peopleproblems@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Back in my day all we had was a pair of slippers and a fuzzy hat. And we had to share the hat.

[–] titanicx@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 day ago

Look at Mr fancy hat. We couldn't even afford hair.

[–] toynbee@piefed.social 9 points 1 day ago

When I started at my current job, the company was still pretty small. I don't know that the founder's past was, but the company had contributed significantly to his wealth and he tended to share it (or maybe show it off) in lavish ways, mostly with the executives but sometimes with the staff in general.

For example, there was what was apparently a very nice, very expensive espresso machine in the break room. (I was told this was the only thing he took when he left the company.) There was also a very very nice grill on the property ... That was allegedly only used once because the owners of the complex said it violated some rule to do so. I always wondered why they just left it instead of ... Moving it to somewhere else where they could use it, even if only personally.

Anyway, the reason I bring up all of this is that he was notorious for showing up with extremely costly and detailed full body costumes and gifting them, unasked, to the executives. I think most of them took them home and hung them out of sight in a closet, but at least one of them kept it in his office in a spare chair as if it were visiting.

I don't remember for sure, but I think it actually was a gorilla suit.

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 49 points 1 day ago (1 children)

From what I learnt about selective attention, people will ignore the gorilla to focus on the basketball game.

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[–] FrChazzz@lemmus.org 9 points 1 day ago

In college we once found a filthy, road-blackened parking cone, and stuck it in the middle of the main road right as the bars were closing. Eventually this enormous pick-up truck full of loud drunk people comes flying down the road and plows into the cone at full speed. We hear someone scream "OH MY GOD!" and maybe something about "was that a person?" And then they floored it, dragging the cone with them. We never found it again.

But in our quest to find the cone we acquired about seven normal looking ones and then randomly made a lane change in the road for no reason. That was pretty funny.

[–] jaaake@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago

Two car related pranks:

We lived near a mall with a giant parking lot and cars were always driving really slow while not looking where they were going. We were dumb kids who learned how to take a spill without hurting ourselves from thousands of hours practicing skate tricks. If we were walking through the parking lot and noticed that a driver hadn't looked in our direction at all, we would roll across the hood of their car and either off the same or opposite side (never the front). People freaked the fuck out and often offered us money. We thought we were doing a public service by teaching them to pay attention by scaring the shit out of them.

We would get the biggest soda cup from 7-11 and instead of filling it with soda, we would put some rare earth magnets inside it and slap in on the roof of our car. That bitch wasn't going anywhere. People would wave at us and try to get our attention, we'd just smile and wave back. They'd shout and point up and we'd shrug and point at our ears like we couldn't hear them. This mostly happened at stoplights. While driving, people were usually trying to work out the physics of it not moving. We took it on the highway a few times and thought the cup would tear itself apart, but it didn't even crack. At that speed, folks caught on real quick and we saw a few bust up laughing.

[–] Know_not_Scotty_does@lemmy.world 23 points 1 day ago (2 children)

These are both awful things to do but I was a really shitty person in highschool.

We would stretch clear plastic wrap between two lamp posts or signposts across a road in our neighborhood at night and hide in the bushes. When a car drove up, it would vaguely look like another car was on the other side because their lights would reflect off the plastic wrap so they would stop and then get out and rip the plastic wrap down of just drive through it.

The other thing we would do was to take a strip of duct tape and string it sticky side up on the road so when a car would drive by, it would stick to their tires and make it sound like a flat tire.

Kids are dumb.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 11 points 1 day ago

Our neighborhood had distinctive split rail fences around all the front yards, and one time, after a big snow storm, we wrapped toilet paper back and forth across the street, using the fence uprights as supports. To a driver, it looked like someone had built a wall of snow across the street.

Cars would recognize the barrier too late, hit their brakes and skid right through it. I'm sure they thought they would hit a solid wall, but then it would just silently "explode," and the presumably shaken driver would travel on, and we'd run out and wrap the toilet paper back and forth for the next victim.

This was back in the 70s, so no method of filming it, but it would have been cool.

It was harmless, but a lot of work setting up again and again, and it would only work on the perfect sunny snow day, so we never got the chance to do it again.

[–] FrChazzz@lemmus.org 4 points 1 day ago

I once knew a guy who, as a kid in the 70s, would take high-test fishing line and stretch it between two trashcans (this was back when they were made of metal). They'd do this just before the street lights came on and they needed to get home. So the dads would be coming home from work in the low light and then suddenly WHAM! they'd have two trashcans smash into the rear of the car. They'd yell and curse in the street, looking for whoever did it.

Then one day a cop comes by and it happens to him. He goes to every house and informs all the families that this is dangerous, that if someone on a motorcycle came through, they could be killed.

What my friend and his buddies heard was "use something more visible than fishing line." So they started using yellow twine. He said this turned out to be funnier because you'd hear the brakes squeal before you'd hear the trashcans hit the sides of the car.

[–] modus@lemmy.world 1 points 17 hours ago

Just placed them in a bowl? Or broke them open and poured all the liquid into the bowl?

[–] mfed1122@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 1 day ago

Brooo classic orbing

[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today 17 points 1 day ago (4 children)

We would stuff the glow sticks in our friend and then send the gorilla out wearing a fish bowl. Were we doing it wrong?

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[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 3 points 23 hours ago

This is amazing.

[–] TryingToBeGood@reddthat.com 3 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I don't think glow sticks had been invented when I was in high school...actually, I take that back: my friend had some that she got from her father who was an engineer in some factory. They were not for general consumption back then.

[–] modus@lemmy.world 2 points 17 hours ago

You probably shouldn't consume them now either.

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 3 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

Glow sticks were invented in the early 70s and were pretty available in the mid 80s. But I don’t remember them either (high school in the late 80s).

[–] TryingToBeGood@reddthat.com 2 points 19 hours ago

I was class of '80, so that tracks.

[–] Bubbaonthebeach@lemmy.ca 3 points 22 hours ago (3 children)

We had to make due with lighting hay bales on fire.

[–] nwtreeoctopus@sh.itjust.works 3 points 21 hours ago

Lighting a hay bale on fire in the road and emerging in a gorilla suit feels more menacing.

[–] musubibreakfast@lemmy.world 2 points 21 hours ago

We didn't even have hay bales, we would just set each other on fire.

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 1 points 21 hours ago

Or fireworks.

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 3 points 23 hours ago

Wow I thought I was old

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

We used to shove each other into the street... Until Lance got shoved into an oncoming car.

[–] whoisearth@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 day ago

Typical Lance ruining it for everyone!

We used to hang out in front of the church on main Street until one Halloween we all saw a crocinole board fly through the air and into the windshield of a passing car. Many of us got to ride in a paddy wagon that night. Fun times.

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

No we just doused shit in acetone and set it on fire.

[–] darklamer@feddit.org 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

One of my brother's classmates ended up burning down an entire grove. After that some of us became a bit more careful.

Loooook honey! Gime ur gun. I always wanted me a stuffed gorilla.

[–] sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz 8 points 1 day ago

Somebody's bit of another person's waking ambien experience

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago (3 children)
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[–] Not_mikey@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)
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[–] Peppycito@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago

We used to stand on either side of the street and pretend to pull a rope across the road. When cars stopped we'd run away.

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