Life is like a penis, its too short
this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2026
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Life comes at you fast.
If your life is hard for more than 4 hours, consult a doctor.
Lol jk that's too expensive.
And sometimes it gets cut short.
And if it’s always down, you can get pills to fix it.
It's also short.
bulging, pulsing, aching...
what were we talking about again?
And sometimes, it comes at you fast.
Even a bit premature at times, mostly a disappointing situation.
Sometimes I just sigh and think to myself, gosh, I wish life wasn't so turgid and veiny with a huge bulbous head and pre-cum dripping down the shaft.
Hahah, never seen that meme before and this was the perfect context to do so. Thanks for the laugh!
I wish my life didn't throw so many hard curves at me. Sometimes I feel like i'm endlessly bouncing around, and it's not always fulfilling.
And then when life stops being hard it just feels... Too dry? It irritates me.
Will the doctor help me if it’s hard for longer than 4 hours? 🥺
Isn't there a snake venom that makes it hard for the rest of your life (without antidote)
You might be thinking of one of the Brazilian Wandering Spiders https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phoneutria_nigriventer
Was featured in the second part of this brilliant documentary https://archive.org/details/deep_jungle
Presenter runs into one while searching for a spider that had reportedly made off with a chicken (not the same spider).
That's is probably what I thought about, pretty easy to get things mixed with my surface level documenty knowledge. Just remembered that there was a creature that gives you a boner and you may die if it's untreated.
I always just assumed it was hard for the rest of your penis’ life, and after a certain point without adequate blood flow…
The rest of my penis' life IS the rest of my life, one way or the other.
Just gonna drop this here:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Priapism
"Imma.... Imma jus gonna sit in here for a... for a coupla hours"
It's hard every morning waking up though
And if it's hard for far longer than it should be, that's an indication that something is wrong.
Oh it seems that the great minds of Lemmy think alike
If the hard-on lasts for more than several decades call nobody.
2026 begs to differ.
For once, the truth has been told on the internet.
It’s been up and f everything in sight for a year
But it's hard if it's up and not hard if it's down?