Every scientific article with “could” in it is bullshit.
I could have a twelve in cock in my pants.
this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2025
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Don't shove numbers up your cock.
I have the square root of negative one in my butt as we speak
Caleful with that, I hear tell those cause sinusoidals.
Not sure about that tbh. Seems only tangential related
I don't believe you, that sounds irrational!
Typed out the number but shortened the units.
No no, it's an in cock, not an out cock. Like the difference between innie and outie belly buttons.
Dude has 12 vagoos in his pants. Still identifies as a dude.
Has trans gone too far??
When will he take a hint??"
No need to brag that your girlfriend could be wearing your pants
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There were plenty of articles claiming similar for her dogshit. Where's the peer reviewed studies?
You think news headlines are concerned with inconvenient shit like evidence?
Of course not. Just pointing out that it's probably bullshit just like previous similar claims. The exact thing its making fun of.
I mean, they really should be. Imagine how much better everything were if news outlets could be hold responsible for spreading lies.
I recently watched an educational video for young students where they said something like "Journalists are usually sources you can trust because if a journalist lies they will lose credibility and their job," and I don't think we're living in the same reality. Just because a particular news source doesn't publish blatant falsehoods doesn't mean they don't lie by omission or use manipulative wording, and that's not even getting into the ones that make money expressly off lying. I think maybe they don't want to teach people to question state propaganda.
Her thing was supposed to work basically instantly, in a small box without a lab. This doesnt say anything about how that blood sample is actually tested.
Came in here for this.
Being able to do this at all is challenging, but building something the size of a bread machine that can be operated by anyone and maintains sterility on its own is something else.
The article doesn't seem to be selling any particular technology, but rather sharing information on the fact that the research is currently in progress.
The concept of identifying risk factors via blood sample has always been a good one. I'm not a scientist or medical professional, so I just assume the reason we're not sequencing everyone's genome is that it's not currently a good use of medical resources. I can't recall the name of this woman or her product, but my recollection is that she was claiming something currently impossible, not theoretically impossible.
They don't name the exact study but this research is related: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-024-52310-9
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I "could" get out of bed and get to work early.
"Could" is doing about as much lifting in this article as Atlas lifting the world.
I'm holding my reservations until something actually comes along
Her con was that her company had machines that could do all the analyzing automatically in seconds, it wasn't than blood analysis had predictive value for at least some diseases.
I don't think that even back then anybody disputed that at the very least doing DNA sequencing of the cells found in blood could predict the likelihood of certain diseases for a person, as the concept of some people having a genetic predisposition for certain diseases was already accepted at the time.
The scam was the "magic" machine that could do it fast and cheaply, not the concept that it can be done.
Actually the scam was that the machine was able to do it from a pinprick blood sample. The idea was that you would take the blood sample yourself, directly at the pharmacy. No doctor appointment and nurse needed. That's why the idea was valued at billions.
And she looks funny in this picture so I 100% stand behind this meme.
Let me be more precise: the Defrauding Of Investors for which she was convicted in Court was that her company was getting people's blood samples and claiming to be analyzing them on their own special machines, whilst in reality they were sending those samples to labs to be analyzed in the traditional way and their machines never worked.
Maybe amongst her various claims she made one as you said (frankly, I don't remember anymore), but that was not what landed her in jail, hence I only mentioned the machines as being the scam.
I supposed one could say both things were elements of her con, even if only one of those amounted to Fraud.
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Faking it until they_found_out_and_put_your_sorry_ass_in_jail VS Making it.
Has anyone ever seen Liz Holmes and Mark Zuckerburg in the same room together? 🤔
gotdang shapeshifters man
What they aren't saying is that you need a mass spectrometer to be able to analyse the pinprick of blood.
What is so uncanny about her hair? It's like a wig, but dry and damaged.
The uncanny, isnt limited to her wig. She looks like a Simpsons character made a wish on a Zoltar machine to be real person.
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Its bleached and straightened. The bellend shape implies it would be curly if she didn't cook it every morning with a flat iron.
Probably bleached too much? She always strikes me as uncanny because she comes across as the female Zuckerberg to me.
So... who is she?
CEO of Theranos, currently spending time in jail for fraudulently saying they could do this.
They said they could do it. They charged people money to do this, when in fact they could not do this.
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Elizabeth Holmes, the former CEO of Theranos. She was sentenced to prison for defrauding investors. She started making claims that she could do exactly what the headline says. She claimed that current blood panels (which usually require a vial of blood for each test) were insufficient and outdated, and that her company could predict or diagnose a ton of diseases and disorders with only a pinprick of blood. She said that her company was already in the final stages of the research, and used those claims to entice investors. She said that her company was going to be on the forefront of a medical revolution, and investors were clambering to get in before they hit the market.
It turns out she was full of shit, was lying through her teeth, the technology didn’t exist, and they couldn’t diagnose anything with the tiny amount of blood she claimed. Medical professionals had been screaming about the fraud for a long time, but techbros and billionaires were happy to continue jumping on the bandwagon because she kept promising results in the near future. When the fraud finally came to light, Theranos’ valuation went from ~$9B to $0 basically overnight. It was a massive “she stole from billionaires, so we’re making an example of her and actually prosecuting the white collar crime that never gets prosecuted” court case that started way back in the mid 2010’s. It only recently wrapped up a few years ago (I think in late 2022 or early 2023?) and she’s still serving time.
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She took millions of investment to make a company that sells "do it at home" blood tests. She never could actually do the tests work, but was trying to sell them anyway, and taking more money by telling investors they worked.
and talking more money by telling investors they worked.
So that's why she's in jail, because she fucked the investors, not for selling a fraudulent product.
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Genetic testing often requires very little blood, other tests may require much more. It is not like you could do all kinds of tests with a pinprick.
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What's Fem!Jobs doing these days?
She’s going to be pardoned by the foreign asset dictator and replace RFK jr after his brain worm is finished eating. I think her lawyers put in the pardon request a few weeks ago.
Given that her crime is essentially scamming rich people, I don’t think so. Rich people get special treatment after all.
Prison time last i heard, but not sure tbh
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Another scam?
I can only read it in her funny voice...
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