this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 4 points 8 hours ago

Trans folks 'know' how magnets work.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 3 points 9 hours ago

He must think his god is very weak if all it takes are magnets to... uh make you forget about him? What exactly does he even mean by magnets sucking god from people's minds? Wait, maybe it's a bad attempt at a blowjob joke?

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 2 points 8 hours ago

What a weak god. My patron goddess has survived waves of mass persecution of her most dedicated followers for over a millennium. This guy can't handle a magnet?

[–] ekZepp@lemmy.world 3 points 15 hours ago

It's just a lazy coverup. Everyone know they're using 5g to do that.

[–] itisileclerk@lemmy.world 4 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I guess "Nobody knows what magnets are" is a thing now in US.

[–] kamen@lemmy.world 1 points 16 hours ago

I guess the yellow man was speaking on behalf of the average US citizen...

[–] xavier666@lemmy.umucat.day 4 points 17 hours ago

looks at my spare bag of neodymium magnets 👀

[–] kamen@lemmy.world 3 points 16 hours ago

Is this how they get parasites out these days? I guess I should get on with the times...

[–] chronicledmonocle@lemmy.world 1 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

At least he doesn't have to worry about it. God can't inhabit his brain because both are non-existent.

[–] Quexotic@infosec.pub 4 points 19 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

2015 oof. Obviously the god killing athiest magnets didn't pan out

[–] ReluctantMuskrat@lemmy.world 3 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Worse than that... they're probably researching if they can reverse this and make their neighbors racist

[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 3 points 12 hours ago

Judging by how shitty the world has become they already have. I wouldn't be surprised if billionaires test social media algorithms and fox programs on people with a brain scanning hat on to make sure the racism center of the brain is lighting up

[–] theacharnian@lemmy.ca 2 points 16 hours ago

I'm not even Catholic and I want to send this guy to the Inquisition for heresy

[–] Aeri@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago

If I knew how to use magic magnets to remove Christianity from people's heads I would have started doing it long ago

[–] Tigeroovy@lemmy.ca 2 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

That’s just the iron in their brains moving around.

[–] Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf 2 points 9 hours ago

You know that sound when the vacuum cleaner picks up some grit and you hear it rattle in the metal tube ...

[–] nightwatch_admin@feddit.nl 5 points 22 hours ago (3 children)

Y’all can laugh at this, but I tried it and it worked (not even trans).

Thing is, I am now stuck with this homeless god. Anyone has any idea what to do with it? Can I properly recycle it somewhere?

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 points 8 hours ago

Have you tried sticking it in a tortoise?

[–] Tigeroovy@lemmy.ca 3 points 17 hours ago

Yeah just wherever you go recycle batteries, there should be a slot for it.

[–] UltraBlack@lemmy.world 1 points 21 hours ago

When left to rot, god will turn into holy water

Fucking magnets, how do they work?

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 58 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Our society is not that different from the 15th century.

[–] Una@europe.pub 34 points 1 day ago (7 children)

We are just apes with pants

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[–] Avicenna@programming.dev 10 points 1 day ago

Give this man a nobel prize for figuring out how magnets work

[–] tomi000@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

Nobody knows what magnets are. Except this guy.

[–] Godort@lemmy.ca 34 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Establishing that god is ferrous or an electric field feels like it should be a heresy

[–] Sabata11792@ani.social 16 points 1 day ago (1 children)

What's god going to do to stop me? Get stuck to the fridge?

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[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 day ago

What is he on and where can I get some?

[–] Devjavu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 day ago

TIL god is iron man.

[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 30 points 1 day ago (4 children)

God is in my brain? Omg get him out of there please. I'm not a social person.

Also, does that mean he identifies god as a brain-parasite?

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[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

Who told them the plan?!

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 18 points 1 day ago

Transgender God Magnets are the new Jewish Space Lasers

[–] PKscope@lemmy.world 22 points 1 day ago (3 children)

If I had known I could make a living just telling blatant falsehoods in an angry way, my life might have turned out a lot differently.

I do enjoy being able to sleep at night, though. So maybe it all worked out for the best.

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[–] CileTheSane@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Can God make a magnet so powerful that even he can't overcome it?

can god make a magnet so gay he wants to fuck it

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

God is all powerful, yet utterly powerless to stop people from being gay and doctors from interfering with his will

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 10 hours ago

Also, he loves you, but if you don't literally worship him, he will make you burn for eternity.

Sounds like an abusive relationship to me.

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[–] epicstove@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 day ago

The onion couldn't write this shit.

[–] aesthelete@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

Apply holy water to deactivate the magnet

[–] slothrop@lemmy.ca 17 points 1 day ago

Magnets are tools of the Antifa corporations.

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