this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 22 comments
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[–] uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

A witchier version of the same sentiment.

two reasons it is!

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 40 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"If you don't stop ~~crying~~ hating me, I'll give you something to ~~cry about~~ hate!"

[–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Man I thought I was the only one who got that stupid line as a kid. My condolences.

[–] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yeah I got it too. Apparently it's not that uncommon sadly.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 8 points 3 days ago (4 children)

And other classics like "wait until your father gets home" and The Belt™.

[–] Hexagon@feddit.it 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)

"If you tell me the truth, I won't get mad"

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 1 points 2 days ago

"George Washington's father didn't hit him with the belt when he came clean about the cherry tree!"

"Yeah, well Washingon's dad wasn't in the tree when he cut it down!"

[–] Texas_Hangover@lemmy.radio 1 points 2 days ago

That worked on me, ONCE.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The Belt might beat The Chopping Board or The Switch, though. Hard to pick a fav honestly.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

The Switch

No kid in my youth wanted The Switch and, now all of a sudden, they're all the rage. 🤷‍♂️

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The funny thing is, I'm not completely sure if you're referring to the game console or BDSM

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

That may just be my friend group of switches asking for the switch before they play switch and cuddle

[–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Lol my dad wasn't coming home and she preferred a fly-swatter, which I should probably be grateful for.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

I guess it depends which part hit you; the soft part or the thin, metal wire handle. 😬

[–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 day ago

Well, they're connected so generally both at the same time. On my bare ass though, it didn't make much difference.

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

Calling the stingy plastic tip that squishes the bugs 'soft' is an interesting description. But either way, still better than the multiple wooden spoons I've had broken over my ass.

ProTip: Asking 'was that supposed to hurt' will get a second spoon broken over your ass

[–] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 days ago

Oh boy, it was just me and my dad so.... just him running the show unfortunately.

[–] Retro_unlimited@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

I went no contact then moved far away. It helps lol

"Hate me, but do it honestly."

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 5 points 2 days ago

Give them enough of a reason, and they may respect you as a fellow asshole.

[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 6 points 3 days ago

I mean... (not really, you probably shouldn't do that)