this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2025
608 points (99.5% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

34632 readers
3298 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 37 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 13 hours ago
[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 2 points 13 hours ago

King of the Shit post.

[–] OZFive@lemmy.world 43 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Ste41th@lemmy.ml 4 points 21 hours ago

Such a good film

[–] doritoshave9sides@lemmy.world 2 points 14 hours ago

Went mumbo jumbo?

[–] Signtist@bookwyr.me 25 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] SavinDWhales@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Loo Bega - Man, blew a No. 5

[–] blindbunny@lemmy.ml 1 points 13 hours ago

Why do I love this form of modern art?

[–] salty_chief@lemmy.world 7 points 21 hours ago

Hater “You must think you’re hot shit!”

Me *Points to porta-john

Me “Not hot but lava motherclucker!”

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 10 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Hey, I know this spot! That building in the background is the studio where they film for Hot Ones. No big deal, they've got a contractor on speed dial for whenever it needs replacement.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 7 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Oh I get it. You made a joke about hot wings resulting in people blowing up toilets.

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 4 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Yes, you figured out the joke and explained it.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 12 points 21 hours ago

I congratulate you both for this successful social interaction.

[–] rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

This is not my favorite Doctor Who episode.

[–] Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 20 hours ago

I told the woman at the counter😢😢😢 low spice level. She said it wasn't hot.

[–] SendMePhotos@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Greddan@feddit.org 5 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Not really, unless you're severely overeating spicy things to the point that it damages your stomach lining. The more common scenario is eating rancid meat, that's been camouflaged with excessive seasoning to hide the taste.

[–] tryitout@infosec.pub 1 points 21 hours ago

I sent sixteen of my own men to the latrines that night...

[–] Capricorn_Geriatric@lemmy.world 5 points 23 hours ago (3 children)

Number one is pee, number two is poo, and number three is barf.

What are four and five, then?

[–] Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works 5 points 20 hours ago

We dont speak of number 4, Number 5 however is when you do all 1-4 all at once and the pure force and gravitational pull makes a mini black hole then quickly explodes.

[–] ekZepp@lemmy.world 3 points 22 hours ago

All shot together with five apparently. 💥

[–] herrvogel@lemmy.world 1 points 20 hours ago

Number 4 is when the force of your shit cannot be contained within the bowl and you have to spend some time cleaning around it when you're done.

Number 5 is when the force of your shit cannot ne contained within the bathroom and you have to pay for renovations when you're done.

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I think a terminator arrived from the future 😥

[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 2 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

No, it's Number Five. Didn't you read the title?

[–] jj4211@lemmy.world 1 points 16 hours ago

Johnny Five?

[–] s@piefed.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

He ate the radioactive Walmart shrimp

[–] HowAbt2day@futurology.today 1 points 22 hours ago

FukuShrimpA

[–] mtpender@piefed.social 5 points 1 day ago

In the immortal words of Kenny

"This is an example of someone having a 2 inch arsehole and us only installing 1 inch plumbing."

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Your trans dimensional shit just destroyed the TARDIS.

[–] Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works 1 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

~~TARDIS~~

SHARTDIS

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 2 points 23 hours ago

Trump tower in a just world

[–] krunklom@lemmy.zip 2 points 23 hours ago

When will humankind figure out how to build a porto potty that can handle a number 5?

[–] dwemthy@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Nothing beats the high of organic, colon cooked meth. Too bad it doesn't mix well with chemical toilets

[–] felixwhynot@lemmy.world 2 points 23 hours ago

I figured they were smoking the pipe and caught something on fire

[–] i_stole_ur_taco@lemmy.ca 1 points 23 hours ago

Someone had a giant blue.

[–] msage@programming.dev 1 points 1 day ago
[–] Chessmasterrex@lemmy.world 0 points 23 hours ago

Too many White Castles