this post was submitted on 13 Sep 2025
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Chapotraphouse

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[–] bruhbeans@lemmy.ml 56 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] FunkyStuff@hexbear.net 39 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Whoever made this 100% believes JFK was either actually killed by Oswald, or thinks the CIA are communists.

[–] MaghrebiLenin@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago (3 children)

What do you think CIA stands for? It literally says Communists in America.

[–] ThermonuclearEgg@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago

"Communist Intelligence of America" obviously

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[–] Rom@hexbear.net 52 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Abe Lincoln, famously only gave speeches

[–] Jabril@hexbear.net 47 points 1 month ago (1 children)

the US civil war was the world's first speech and debate competition

[–] mickey@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago (2 children)

From wikipedia

The original Henry rifle was a sixteen-shot .44 caliber rimfire breech-loading lever-action rifle, patented by Benjamin Tyler Henry in 1860 ...

At Vicksburg, Edward Downs of the 20th Ohio Volunteer Infantry Regiment and a noted sharpshooter, bought a Henry rifle from his own funds for $65 (equivalent to $1,700 in 2024) from a steamboat captain just prior to the Vicksburg battle ...

For an American Civil War soldier, owning a Henry rifle was a point of pride.[5] Just 1,731 of the standard rifles were purchased by the government during the war.[6] The Commonwealth of Kentucky purchased a further 50. However, 6,000 to 7,000 saw use by the Union on the field through private purchases by soldiers who could afford it. ... Many infantry soldiers purchased Henrys with their reenlistment bounties of 1864. Most of these units were associated with Sherman's Western troops.

That's a whole lotta free speech.

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[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Didn't he offer to "debate" someone in a pit with broadswords?

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Kinda. If memory serves a guy challenged Lincoln to a duel which Lincoln didn’t really want to do but as the challenged it was his right to decide the weapons. Lincoln chose broadswords and beforehand told the dude that they didn’t have to go through with it. Lincoln then swung the sword around his head, lopping off a chunk of tree branch which was the height of Lincoln’s body + outstretched arm + broadsword. Apparently this shook the dude when he realized that sword fighting a guy with an extra foot of reach was a death sentence and they resolved. Young Abe psyched the dude out.

[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 50 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] Pentacat@hexbear.net 25 points 1 month ago

A Jewish guy born in Bethlehem? Definitely Polish.

[–] WafflesTasteGood@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

Jesus? Nah thats Russell, i used to work with him at a restaurant. He was cool but i think he took a few too many blows to the head in the mosh pit or maybe ate too much acid at once or something.

[–] vegeta1@hexbear.net 45 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It ain't failed until the last McDonald's closes, hold the line!

[–] hexthismess@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Where does collapse of the govt rank on the Waffle House disaster index?

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago

Baby, how bad is it out there?

The Waffle House is still open.

There is hope.

[–] Moonstruck_Theorist@hexbear.net 39 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

AI image of Charlie Kirk playing cards with dogs.

AI image of Charlie Kirk with Peter Griffin and Archer and Rick and Bojack Horseman.

AI image of Charlie Kirk in heaven taking a selfie with Ozzy Osbourne.

This is a resigned prediction, I do not want these things to happen, but fear that we cannot stop it.

[–] hotspur@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Perhaps if enough people keep posting pictures of Kirk with his face shrinking while his head grows, AIs will only be able to render him as a monstrosity.

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[–] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 38 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Really makes you think. What were those words, I wonder? :thonk:

[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Fourteen of them, I think.

[–] RiotDoll@hexbear.net 34 points 1 month ago (1 children)

the historical jesus was likely a fucking rebellion leader. the civil rights movement had multiple wings and a movement that was willing to get dirty - the chief executive crackers are just agents of imperialism who, by the sheer grace of their time and place, did a few things that were probably good, relative to their peers.

how has information quality fallen so much that this swine garbage actually has purchase?

can i also say, this thing where capital murders people and turns them into martyred icons whose main purpose is to quell the movements that made them dangerous to be like, one of the most infuriating tricks that people consistently fall for

[–] fort_burp@feddit.nl 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Jesus was killed by the cops, which Kirk would translate as "you sure it wasn't an overdose?".

[–] VILenin@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago

Are we sure that Jesus didn’t die from autoerotic crucifixtion?

[–] GanjaGuevara@lemmygrad.ml 33 points 1 month ago

that's enough for me today

[–] micnd90@hexbear.net 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] huf@hexbear.net 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

jesus has been killed again?! since kirk died? wow. i did not know that.

[–] JohnBrownsBawdy@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Every time I beat off, or so that Sunday school teacher told me. He’s got an awful job, keeps getting resurrected just for me to refresh xHamster.

[–] huf@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

jesus, yet another victim of climate change or something

[–] fort_burp@feddit.nl 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This must slap if you're one of the stupids.

[–] JohnBrownsBawdy@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

This is why they argue so passionately that llms can create art.

[–] Lemmygradwontallowme@hexbear.net 26 points 1 month ago

^ All because of words glasses-off

^ All because of *14 words glasses-on

[–] doleo@lemmy.one 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Why's Jared Leto on there?

[–] Maturin@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Because of the words he slipped into underage girls’ DMs

[–] doleo@lemmy.one 8 points 1 month ago

all because of words 😢 I see it, now

[–] Euergetes@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

SIC SEMPER TYRANNIS (trns.) "i really hated that fuckin gettysburg speech, 'four-score-and-seven-years' fucking nerd who talks like that"

[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

I remember having to memorize that speech in like 5th grade history, it fucking sucked. Like every person had to go one by one and recite it to the teacher

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

The incoherency of the right is astounding. This is like what an AI would generate based on some premise of pop cultural martyrs with Charlie Kirk jammed in the lineup.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Kirk wouldn't want to be pictured next to a black guy that advocated against segregation my dude.

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[–] Horse@lemmygrad.ml 13 points 1 month ago

agony-mescaline

i am become the fucking joker

[–] crusa187@lemmy.ml 13 points 1 month ago

I think most people really don’t give a shit about Kirk’s death, or at the most think “meh, world is a slightly better place now.” Like, 90% of us.

All this fash froth is coming from a few right wing influencers who want to cash in on the killing, or the corpo media who want to manufacture consent for further invading our own country. It’s really quite evidently bullshit.

[–] HowAbt2day@futurology.today 12 points 1 month ago

Who’s the damn Jedi to the far right?

[–] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago

I know, AI slop. Those fascists just can’t handle any different opinions, even if you agree with them 99.99% of the time.

From the Roman Empire to the Groypers, the dominant power structure never takes dissent well.

[–] tamagotchicowboy@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago

When fascism goes full mask off froth in Murikkka it will come with an oddly tiny face, not merely just wrapped in a cross. It must be a spectacle.

[–] DivineChaos100@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

Mr. Christ, get down!!!

[–] XiaCobolt@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

I want to make a Five Heads of joke, but I'm not sure what...

[–] chungusamonugs@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

On the one hand visible-disgust

On the other, Kirk hated MLK and would probably rage-cry about being pictured next to him, so lmao.

[–] RedWizard@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago

A chud was using that for a vigil in my state this weekend...

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