Ty
Angel
Same for me.
I do identify as Afrikan above all else, but I probably wouldn't refer to myself as such in any context where it could incur confusion.
"FBAs" don't identify with the term "African American" specifically because they hate the "African" part of it.
I don't identify with the term "African American" specifically because I hate the "American" part of it.
We are not the same.
Something that bothers the hell out of me is when white queer people expect me to be queer first and Black second.
I did that, and it led to immense self-hate and feeling like I belonged literally nowhere.
My queerness and androgynous presentation greatly impact how I move through the world, yes, but no matter what, anyone who looks at me will see that I am Black FIRST. Not only that, but unlike my queerness, the fact that I am Black is literally tied to an entire fucking history and lineage, and that shapes the conditions of how I and other Black people as a whole exist today.
There is not a single thing about me that is actually more important than my Blackness, honestly. People will say, "Why do you make everything about race?". Well, it's because the system did it first. That's why, motherfucker.
No white person (or non-Black person, period, to be honest) I have dated has been able to make me feel seen in terms of race. Even the very person who would be in what is supposed to be the most intimate position they could ever possibly be in my life could not truly grasp this extremely important thing about me and how I exist in this world. Their intentions could've been the best, and they could've been the nicest people, but it made my relationships hurt and devoid of joy.
I am even very careful about having white people as just friends, let alone me refusing them as partners.
To this day, I think of the first partner I ever had and how she, as a Black woman, made that relationship feel like literally no other relationship of mine that came after that. She is actually the only Black person I have dated so far, and that is something I intend to change when I am far more stable.
White leftists are a fucking joke.
CW: Racist Violence
I have seen how terrible these people are IRL, even. I have been physically assaulted by white queer people, including white queer women. This even happened to me at an earlier job I had, and I felt scared to tell anyone because I knew that no one would be on my side, especially since I was the only Black person there.

Bump