You get used to it, especially when nobody cares. Walking into a corner shop in nothing but shorts is pretty Sus in a city in winter, but if it's a hot summer day and the corner shop is near the beach, it's fine.
this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2025
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social conditioning
Something about feeling like a mom I guess? Idk I don’t have kids! xD For me, rocking a bikini = feeling confident about my body. I used to wear smaller bikinis when I was younger but now I find swim shorts much more comfortable, practical, carefree. Why are us women wearing small tight swim clothes anyway, that you gotta adjust, fuss with the strings, prevent the nip slip, etc. Meanwhile men wear comfy shorts? Well it helps that I’m not at that stage in my life where I’m looking to date or impress anyone lol.
I will say that if I were diligent about going to the gym and had a rockin bod, then yes. I’d probably wear that bikini to show off my hard work😉💪🏼
People here saying consent (fair enough) but let me tell you, clothes are suggestive. There is more to suggestion and context than the actual content. Is anybody shocked to see a nude statue in a museum or something? Or in a painting? Now how about somebody wearing nothing but a g-string and a harness? You can argue the harnessed person in a gstring is less exposed than any nude. I say no. Clothing adds to the exposure sometimes. Underwear isn't meant to be seen, so when it's seen, it prompts judgement.
I go to a nudist resort fairly frequently. Most of it is clothing optional except for the pools, so you see people walking around in various states of undress depending on the weather and what they're doing (watched a guy weedwacking naked last time I was there, seemed ill-advised IMO)
You pretty quickly stop seeing nudity as being sexy there . It certainly doesn't help that the average nudist is middle aged or older and often not in the best shape.
This resort also attracts a decent amount of swingers. While the nudists aren't particularly trying to impress anyone, that's pretty much the whole reason the swingers are there. So how do you make yourself look sexier than just walking around naked? You wear something. Bathing suits, pasties, big flashy jewelry, crazy hats, see-through dresses, ropes, etc.
And though many of them aren't much more attractive than the nudists, they turn some heads.
watched a guy weedwacking naked last time I was there
In case you were wondering, this is a weedwacker
I shall choose to go with my initial interpretation of the term.
To summarize your statement, social conditioning
Exactly. I see a bikini every time I see people swimming. Underwear though, that implies some form of intimacy
See also: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheissTitillationTheory : "The sexiness of an outfit is directly proportional to the perceived possibility that a vital piece of it might fall off."
We have an ad for ice-creams in NZ that covers this topic https://youtu.be/h-Lx2ihpGbc
Tog tog tog tog
Were you confident or just lacked a more adult understanding of nudity plus you had a greater desire for praise for your physical attributes?
I just got done working a comic convention this weekend. You might be pretty surprised by the general lack of clothing most people wear to those things (calling it a "costume").
Just this weekend alone, I saw at least five guys walking around without a shirt, and I don't know how many women wearing things that showed basically everything. Like so tight and thin I could tell what kind and color underwear they were wearing.
And this was in Indianapolis, far from a beach or lake, right in the middle of downtown.
Shoot, was GenCon this weekend?
Seems a little early for it.
Context and culture and expectations. I agree with your point, but there isn't a logical/sensible answer to these things.
I'm a man and I don't think it would be acceptable for me to wear a Speedo swimsuit or have my bum exposed the way some thong bikini bottoms do. Communities, societies and cultures dictate what's acceptable in an unsaid way. It is what it is.
Some commenters in this thread are reacting in a pointed way because questions like yours seem to imply that there should be a judgement of control of what women can/cannot do. People can do what they want, but it's also OK to think about the absurdity of society's rules......like why some women with a certain body shape can wear bikinis but others get disgusted looks. Or why it is so socially unacceptable to wear the Borat mankini. Or taking it further: why is full nudity so unacceptable and offensive? My answer is: there is no logical answer and this is what the societal collective seem to have agreed.
We are on vacation right now and my SO actually wears only the bottom of the bikini and goes bra less to the beach, because she says it's unfair I can free my nipples and she can not. Well that's pretty fair I would say?
We are European though and probably a bit less prude than US Americans.
my SO actually wears only the bottom of the bikini and goes bra less to the beach, because she says it’s unfair I can free my nipples and she can not
Doesn't sound like she can't.
If boobs had guns like in Austin Power, our heads would explode trying to figure out if we cared about the 2nd amendment more or being prudes.
Well considering I’m going to be around my son and other family members that’s not really possible lmao.
Social conditioning, once again. We're French, and it's totally possible for us.
Yesterday, among strangers, at the local lake, my 42 year old friend was topless, playing with her 7 year old son and her 5 year old (naked) step-daughter. A 36 yo pregnant friend was wearing a string bikini around her husband, 6 yo daughter, and in-laws. It was a non-issue.
Not saying all rules can always be broken, but they're heavily context- and culture-dependant.
To be fair, if your son cares it's only because you/society taught him to care.
Why? Does your son not understand human anatomy or is he afraid of boobs?
We all grew up seeing our moms boobs at some point.
Yes comrade, we all grew up seeing your mom's boobs. 🫡
Ol' Pancho and Lefty
My mom raised us to be comfortable with our bodies, so we wouldn't even have the door closed when we were bathing.
The difference is consent
The difference is one is battle armor.
And I doubt you would feel comfortable with someone staring at you in a bikini either.
Obviously consent is the non negotiable standard nowadays (or I wish it were so) but it's true that beaches/swimming pools as a social construct allow for a lessened sense of prudishness in public. Underwears simply do not belong to this construct
Swimming apparel is explicitly made from slightly thicker and very different material, keeping you from looking like you entered a wet-tshirt-contest. That alone is a big subconscious help. Or are you talking about the amount (or rather lack) of clothing?
It’s more of the general exposure of my midriff, cleavage, and cheeks. But I’ll probably just say fuck it and rock it anyways lol.
Frills
Disclaimer: I am a strait white mail
Consent. If you see a woman in her swimsuit in public it's because she wants you to. If you see a woman in her underwear in public it's because she wants you to. If you see a woman in either when she DOESN'T want you to then she's likely to have the same reaction. Same as dude's in swim trunks. Public? Fine. Walk in on changing? Likely to be a bit "ahhhh!"
I'd say it's the intention.
It does tbh