Ask Lemmy

I went to the year 12 graduation +30 years one as the first, mostly to see if anyone I knew was there

The main party organiser from class of 1995 was also in my house in high school and college (yr 11 and 12) and recognised me and everyone else and since then I met up with the group of people they get to attend events

It turns out most of them are on the wrong side of politics and don't know anything about the internet. AI for them is a tool to make the peak of comedy - altering photos to have big noses or two of the men holding hands

I keep quiet about my history of not caring about the gender or sex of the person I'm fucking or who's fucking me

I did, but undercover. It was hilarious!

A lot changed in my life after graduation, including my first name and my surname (the latter due to marriage, the first thanks to deed poll, I always disliked the name my parents gave me...).

A few dear old friends from school knew about me living abroad, about all the other changes going on in my life and since all of us were the weird folks back then, we decided to prank everyone else big time.

So, I went there as a friend of one attending. Fricking no one recognised me. Not a soul. But they kept asking why person x was the only one no one found contact details of online, or any other way of contact. The person they knew just disappeared into thin air after graduation.

A big mystery no one could figure out who wasn't in on the ruse. Some great theories we've overheard that evening included, but were not limited to:

A) dead

B) in prison

C) became a hermit

I stood right next to those people I went to school with for over 10 years, some I knew even longer.

It was a fun challenge for me keeping a straight face for the entire evening while drinks were also involved. Not one person could figure out they knew me in the first place. :D

I went to the first one and didn’t enjoy myself. Saw the assholes are now cops and most of the self-proclaimed cool kids were now shilling one MLM or another. Everyone still hung out in the same groups they did in high school. They held a moment of silence for the popular dickhead who got drunk and drowned in a river after high school.

Never once. I still talk to the only people from there I care to know.

No.

I'd moved out of state by the time the first one came around. Seemed like a lot of bother and expense to see people I didn't keep in touch with otherwise.

Never got invited lol. Not that I'd go, I have no interest in mingling with white supremacists. I grew up in a fun area.

Thought about the 10 year then went to see phish instead

Yes and I even volunteered to plan it. We didn't have one until 20 years and it was nice to see how people all kind of become normal. Even the kids that were assholes were reasonable to talk to and several apologies were made.

I went to a smallish high school (a handful more than 100 per grade) and all of us were together since kindergarten. Some people flat out said they wouldn't come and I think they missed out.

We had some teachers show up that were still in town. Some dude was like "hey dream_weasel I'm sorry I used to pick on you here's why I did", and some ancient crushes and gossip got revealed. It was on the whole pretty fun. I think we will do one for 25 years now.

The entire purpose of highschool reunions was rendered irrelevant as soon as social media was invented.

Absolutely not. No desire to see those people again. I didn’t enjoy high school, and I don’t like the person I was back then either. Everyone is better off going their separate ways.

I’m so relieved to find a ton of other “no’s” in this thread!

I always felt like I was being a bit antisocial not to go to one. I’ve never been to a college reunion either. I’ve kept in close touch with only one person from high school and a handful from college. Add to that: 1) I don’t feel like I have much to brag about; 2) I would feel icky bragging even if I did. And that’s what I imagine reunions to be, if you haven’t kept in touch generally: just a bunch of near-strangers posturing to each other to feel better about themselves. I just don’t have any interest in that. It’s much the same reason I got off of social media about 10 years ago (minus the link aggregators/forums).

I did not. If I wanted to keep in touch with people I would have.

Oh fuck no. There are a handful of people from highschool I wouldn't mind catching up with, but the vast majority of them I either never met well enough to form an opinion, or actively disliked.

...and as long as it's been, every single one of us is a completely different person now. It'd basically be like meeting a few hundred complete strangers. And at that point, I can just go to a bar or something and meet complete strangers right here - why travel to reunion for that?

Did not attend. I didn't like those people when I was in highschool. There's no way I want to see them now.

No, I never had a close relationship with anyone in high-school. As the gay, neurodivergent kid...I didn't fit in all that much. I ignored all my reunion invites.

No, because all of my high school peers were enemies. High school - or rather the entirety of my childhood - was a time of bullying. All I learned was how to hate and eradicate myself. How the fuck am I still here.

i forget how it came up, but last year someone mentioned high school reunions and i was thinking, "hey, my ten year should be coming up soon. i wonder if it'll be worth going" and then later that night one of my old friends from high school mentioned he just got back from it. i'm sitting there wondering if i would be generous enough to grace them with my presence while the event was currently going on and i wasn't even invited! the more things change, the more they stay the same

I can not imagine voluntarily entering the 7th ring of hell.

Invites were probably on Facebook and I don't give enough fucks to login.

I only went to high school for two years then took all my classes at the community college, so I wasn't like super well known or liked or anything. I've also had a gender change since then, and I don't wanna have that conversation the whole event.

I did not go to the tenth or twentieth. I can’t imagine how they’d even find me for the thirtieth in the 2030s, I don’t really do any social media these days.

I’m an introvert and haven’t kept up with anyone from high school. Seems like it’d just be awkward.

This year would be my 25th. Never been invited to a single one. There have been several, as a friend has confirmed.

I'm not worried about ever seeing those assholes again. K-12 was spent being tormented for being different. Not something I need to relive.

If I was invited, I doubt I'd go. It's not even worth my time to flex on someone I couldn't be bothered to give a cold shit about.

I keep in touch with my real friends, always. No need to reuinte with a bunch of bigots who made my youth a hell in a box.

Nope. Hell I'm not even sure there was one.

The venn diagram of "people who organize and attend high school reunions" and "people I want to ever see again" are two circles drawn on different pages in different books on different shelves.

No. High school for me was spent with people with which I have nothing in common, so I didn't keep in touch with anyone there.

I still stumble into people I once knew, and I of course say hi and engage in some chitchat, but nothing beyond that.

No. I've spent a long, long time and a lot of effort to try and fundamentally change the shitty person I was back then. I don't want to revisit that chapter at all.

No. It always seems to happen when im going through financial crisis. granted feels like half the years are financial crisis.

I feel like people don't do this anymore. My highschool was very large and I don't think myself or anyone I know even knew who is responsible for it so it never happens

No, and I doubt anyone would remember me. I sure as hell don't give a shit about any of them. I was relentlessly bullied and picked on in school, to the point where my parents took me out and homeschooled me during my freshman year onward because it was obvious that the school staff wouldn't do anything about it.

I never even heard that one was planned

I was interested in attending my 10 year but I guess no one actually organized it so there wasn't one to go to.

I vaguely remember tossing some mail about a reunion a number of years ago, never planned on going to one.

I can count on one hand the number of people I've willingly talked to since highschool, and none of them in the last 15 years.

Plus I guarantee nobody would be friendly to a Trans person. My highschool once made national news for a hate crime...

I'm in my 40's and have never gone to one of my own.

It's pretty simple. I had one really good friend in high school and about a dozen friends I hung with often. I was in the rebellious out group and didn't really like the vast majority of the people at my high school, and thanks to social mediak, I already get to see how boring or train wrecky their lives have become if I ever get curious.

So there's just no need.

No, 'cuz it's just "look at me! Look how successful I am!" Boring as shit.

No. High school sucked because teenagers suck. Any decent people from then I just kept in touch with. Those who peaked at 17 are pretty pathetic.

Fuck no. I dropped out of High School thanks to a bunch of racist Hawaiians and Samoans because I started standing up against their bullying midyear.

Kids that look like they might be military brats got targetted quick. I wasn't one of those kids, but I was just another "fucking haole". School staff turned a blind eye to the harassment and intimidation. Shits a lost cause when the campus security is literally related or close with these kids families.

Dropped out, got a GED, got a job, started a family, moved back stateside, never looked back. Aloha Oe, ya fuckers lol

No. I kind of forgot they existed. With modern communications, I don't need to meet up with a bunch of people I don't care for in order to keep in touch with the handful I do.

Went to both my and my partner's 10 year. Both sucked. Would never do it again.

No. Don't think I was even invited to any.

I'm not close to anyone from high school. I haven't talked to anyone from that era in years. I wasn't my best self back then, and I don't really want to relive it.

Either they don't have those here (UK) or I've never been invited to one. I don't go looking for open invite reunions either way, so as you might guess, I doubt I'd go to one, morbidly curious or not.

Is that actually a thing people do?

Nope. I figured I wouldn't get invited due to not having a Facebook account and only staying in touch with two friends from HS. Even if I did get invited, I planned on ignoring it. There's no reason to go back to my hometown. I've moved on to bigger and better things and frankly don't see the point in looking backwards.

I was correct, did not receive an invite.

I remember peering into the facebook group where they were planning our reunion, they were making a list of all the people who most likely wouldn't show up and therefore "didn't need an invite".

The list was basically all the unpopular kids they didn't like.

Yes.

Did not like the people much back then but was still interested how it all developed.

I had some nice talks. It was fun talking to my highschool crush she seems to still be the same person. Glad it did not work out back than otherwise I'd propably still be stuck back there.

The most interesting part was seeing people that told me they thought I was the cool person back then while I was very insecure back then and definitly did not think of myself as cool.

We haven’t had one, but if there were, I would probably go. I was pretty much friends with everyone, and I still stay in touch with a few people I am very close with.

My feelings towards a middle school reunion is pretty much the same as everyone's feelings towards high school reunion. I would never show up to a middle school reunion. There were some people who tried to do one 10-15 years ago, and I never went, and I never will. The people there sucked. I never want to see them again. If I do then I pretend not to know them and I am pretty sure they do the same.

No. I'm still working on unfucking myself after the way those assholes treated me. Why would I want to see them again? I'm not successful enough to flex on anyone.