A Boring Dystopia

Wait, you guys are getting dates?

We're not talking enough about

Paul Dilda, BMO’s head of U.S. consumer strategy

Who is spending $200 on a first date‽

That's like 30 minutes with a mid-tier escort.

Relatively new to dating via apps as an elder millennial freed from a life time of monogamy. (Only been at it 6 months)

Who are these people who want to go on a first date that involves being in a situation like a restaurant?

Seems like with apps people skip the whole courting thing and jump straight in to something that should only be for once you get to know each other a bit better.

For me, first meeting is a coffee or a drink at a well populated cafe or bar. Maybe a walk after somewhere busy in the city.

Maybe I'm just old and out of touch.

Holy shit. And here I thought that the price of a cup of coffee was less than $10.

Because that’s what you do on a first date - coffee and chat, either at the coffee house or on a walk near it.

Spending $$$ on a first date is a great way for any guy to get hosed, and just sets up unrealistic expectations. You don’t do anything expensive until several dates in, once compatibility and mutual interest have been confirmed.

You shouldn't spend any money on her until you've had sex, so she doesn't feel pressure to put out after an expensive dinner. Ideally, she should put out before the date even begins, just to make her feel more secure.

So I finally feel motivated enough for once in my life to get fit but still can't smash. Got it. Might as well just retreat into a mountain and isolate myself from society for good. No point at insisting on the charade at this point. I've been long beyond my 20s and still have the salary of a 5-years ago college grad. FML

This article draws all the wrong conclusions from the design of the survey itself. That's the average date expense, for all single people, to include:

• Rich people who don't mind paying more for dinners out.
• People who have been dating a long time, on their later dates with someone they're already steadily dating and/or fucking.
• Other expenses of a date, to include hair and makeup and other styling.

Digging into one of the surveys discussed in the article shows that the cost of a first date has climbed to $93.

$93 is more in line with what I'd expect. And yes, that price tag can price a lot of people out of bringing someone they don't know well yet on a formal sit down date.

I went to look up the menu at the place where my wife and I had our first date, in an expensive city. If we ordered what we ordered that night, except with today's prices, I think we would've spent about $30 on food, $50 on wine, and 30% on tax and tip for a total of about $105. We also split the tab. And that's with someone who I had already met in person in a few places (friends of friends), had already established rapport over the phone, and already knew that we both loved the restaurant we were meeting at.

Obviously we need more cheap/free third places in the mix. And our society would benefit from better income/wealth equality. But while we live in this current situation, people should be generally be ramping up in closeness before spending real money on dates in places they wouldn't have otherwise gone to. I couldn't imagine spending real money before getting to know someone at least enough to know whether I like them and enjoy being around them.

Dating = Restaurant body doubling? American advertisers lost the plot

"wHy ArEn'T tHe YoUnGeR gEnErAtIoNs GeTtInG mArRiEd AnD hAvInG cHiLdReN??"

That's a ridiculous amount of money to spend.

Most of my first dates were like

• walk to bar ($0) or subway ($3)
• a drink for both ($10 - $30)
• transit back ($0 or $3)

Even two drinks wouldn't probably break the $100 barrier.

There are cheaper options, too. Coffee. Park walk and snacks. Free museums.

I didn't have much trouble meeting people on the same page.