this post was submitted on 09 Mar 2026
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Chapotraphouse

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This is the warning on the blood pressure monitor my dad just got. Exceptional work. Anybody know what the fuck it’s supposed to mean? Last line is especially ominous.

https://bsky.app/profile/huwbowen.bsky.social/post/3mgmxypqq4s2w

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My decorative "Pacclabmech is not mehee yem 3a 10 muhym before measuring pressure" throw pillow has a lot of people asking questions already answered by my throw pillow

[–] Damarcusart@hexbear.net 7 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

I've had a few conversations with people at the pub like this.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 3 points 22 hours ago

Pacclabmech is not mehee yem.

Hmm...

Uzmerguyamu - not more than 5 muhym.

That's very true.

[–] jared@mander.xyz 16 points 1 day ago (3 children)

3, Pacclabmech is not mehee

Words to live by, really.

[–] casskaydee@hexbear.net 12 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

But, doctor, you don't understand. I am Pacclabmech

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 9 points 1 day ago

The wish is granted. Long live Jambi!

[–] RION@hexbear.net 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Bro got Pacclabmech confused with Zendaya i-cant

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 23 hours ago

Common mistake 🤷🏻

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)
  1. Please read the operating manual before using.

  2. Remove this film before using.

  3. The Holy Hand Gernade of Antioch.

  4. Careful where you place this. It can feel like a lot of pressure on your arm.

  5. Not a life saving device (not for use as a tourniquet).

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 23 hours ago

5 is right out!

[–] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 5 points 21 hours ago

biden-pain "Come on, man!"

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 19 points 1 day ago (2 children)

#2 is good. #3 is a near favorite. #4 has charm. But this is my favorite...

5. Don't be so careful in time of death.

[–] john_browns_beard@hexbear.net 18 points 1 day ago

geordi-no "Do not go gentle into that good night."

geordi-yes "Don't be so careful in time of death."

[–] Meltyheartlove@hexbear.net 13 points 1 day ago

tagline material

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 18 points 1 day ago (3 children)

This is somehow a mix of English and weirdly transliterated Russian. “Pacclambech” is “Расслабьтесь” which means relax.

The whole third step means something like “Relax not less than 10 minutes before measuring pressure. Between two measurements — not more than five minutes

fxlr8 comments on This note stuck to my new blood pressure monitor.

[–] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 2 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)

Probably Russian text was scanned and run through Google Translate. Some words were scanned as if they were in English and never fixed.

[–] hotspur@hexbear.net 5 points 1 day ago

I assume the last line is essentially saying to not worry about all the steps/setup if you’re in a life threatening situation?

Pretty good advice either way though.

[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 1 day ago

A Reddit link was detected in your comment. Here are links to the same location on alternative frontends that protect your privacy.

[–] uSSRI@hexbear.net 14 points 1 day ago

Joe Biden writing blood pressure cuff instructions in his time off. Even former presidents have to keep working in this economy! Yikes!

[–] tamagotchicowboy@hexbear.net 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Apparently if you're too cautious while dying bad things happen?

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 3 points 1 day ago

My imaginary r/TIL post that gets 10,000 likes...

Dont be So careful in Time of Death because Bad things happen

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 7 points 1 day ago

Last line is especially ominous.

If I had to guess I'd say if you got someone actually dying maybe worry less about the cuff blowing up and more about that

[–] umbrella@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 day ago

yeah go out with a bang!

[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 1 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago)

~~just in time~~ "eh, good enough" manufacturing.