This guy has ruined satire news...
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Satire now would just be him doing anything like a normal sane president.
"I am a Nigerian Princess and I am going to start my own UN. If you decide to invest a billion dollars in it now, you are guaranteed to at least double your investment by the end of the year."
Noice country ya have here, vary vary noice...would be a shame if someone invaded it....wunnit?

Nobody expects...
The Gambino Inquisition!
Why can't they just make a Discord server for free instead??
Sounds like a scam
It's Trump, so the odds are ever in your favor.
Bored of peace....
And what if they don't, will he kidnap their Presidents too? Or maybe tarrif them?
Trump is a genius inventor: he keeps coming up with new ways to take bribes
It's a coin operated system. Insert $25M for the next 6 days of peace.
And it won't be by GDP either. He will ask the exact same amount from each country. If you're too small to pay, you get conquered
The US government is now a racket headed by an infamous NY gangster that made a fortune scamming people in the real estate business.
History does beat fiction
Board of peace has the same energy as ministry of truth
First one trump invited is ofcourse putin ... ???

Sounds like the league of nations just collapsed
A board of peace - after telling the Norwegian prime minister that he's not committed to peace anymore because he didn't get the peace price (and no, the PM doesn't control the peace price)
didn’t he just threaten denmark that he’s done with peace because he didn’t win the peace prize 😑
That's cute but where are the Epstein files?
The "in cash" part is quite interesting...
Trump creates his own un-united nations
FTFY
The 1bn requirement is a great way to make sure countries in the global south can't join.
Somebody? Anybody?
He doesn't know how to spell, its meant to be "Bored of Peace"
Rimmer: United America? Who's that?
Kryten: Well, at the end of the 23rd century, America attempted to bring peace to the world by asking every nation on Earth to sign a peace treaty.
Any nation that refused, they invaded.
Now, a war ensued that was called the War Against War. Those countries who went to war because they were so against war, they were prepared to go to war to fight in a war against war, called themselves United America.
(Sorry can't find a better source)
A "Board of Peace" membership and a 100 Euro bill are worth 100 Euros combined.
The grift goes on.
On Friday, the White House presented the composition of "a founding Executive Board", consisting exclusively of figures loyal to Trump: his Middle East adviser Steve Witkoff, his son-in-law Jared Kushner, Secretary of State Marco Rubio and former UK prime minister Tony Blair.
It's astonishing how often Tony Blair manages to find new ways to be a massive fucking disappointment. It's like he's already concluded that he's going to hell for the whole Iraq thing so he'd may as well lean into it by being a huge cunt while he's alive.
I thought the same thing. I mean the whole Iraq thing could be seen as a misjudgement in hindsight. Now though he just looks evil.
Well, after he got a Nobel Peace Prize, it makes sense that he moves onwards towards his next great wish: King Of The World.
It's is honestly amazing just how giving stupid this man is. Like, I am amazed.
It costs money to join the axis? This will break the future Hearts of Iron IX mechanics.
The stupid thing about this is the US already has a disproportionate amount of influence in the UN. Greed is something that can't ever be satisfied.
Trump isn't getting $1B from countries joining the UN.
"Board of Peace" tracks better than "Golden Dome". Good phrase donny. That'll make everyone forget about your pedophiliac degeneracy.
What's the point? Both organizations will be useless as fuck
Not useless. He’ll now have an additional $1B to steal!
This is hilarious 🤣 I can’t believe he’s just straight up starting a protection racket!
“It’d be a shame if something happened to you green land over here!”
Well, that’s one way to start the new Axis powers. The internal fascist structure could be a gamble (usually even other fascist leaders want to have more authority than deference), but I guess we’ll see how it goes.
The grift goes global.
Lol. Lmao.
