I know from experience that the fuckshed dudes know how to fuck good. Their fuck shed is usually even nicer than the bedroom in their house/apartment.
this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2025
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Van fuckers are just shed fuckers who have not yet settled down and gotten a fuckshed.
What if you have a fuck van and a fuck shed?
...asking for a friend
Are basement fuckers shed fuckers who haven't committed to the shed fucker life?
Haven't been chained up in a sex basement yet. 🤷♂️
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"Sex area" sounds like ChatGPT's gone steamy, only to give up five prompts later.
Once I manage to gather enough savings I'm designing a sex attic. Just need to insulate the roof and put in some heating.
Wood shed? Bus stop? Library?
You guys actually get matches?
Goddamn. Here I am in straight world with exactly one match in an entire year that wasn't a bot.
Eh
Fuck it the apps are scams anyway
If you download Grindr, you too can have an inbox full of poorly lit bathroom dick pics and people asking you if you know where they can get hard drugs!
It’s less a “dating” app, and more a way for “straight” men in denial of their sexuality to find dl fun.
Almost makes me wish I was gay. Getting some strange would be easier at least lol
There are women on the app too. And don't forget the femboys. ;)
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Grindr doesn't have matching. You just see a profile you like and message them directly.
That's probably why it actually works.
That's how Hinge works also. The reason Grindr works is that men are more likely to be down to fuck in the Wendy's bathroom with a stranger.
Sounds like you need to work on your profile and set of pics. Many years ago I logged into PoF as a woman and was stunned at how bad the other guy's profiles were.
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Write something humorous, make your post amusing, doesn't have to be LOL funny
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Don't list anything you find unacceptable, too negative
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Don't list anything you have to have in a partner, too demanding
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Post a wide variety of pics, get a couple of your very best, but get some day-to-day pics in there, looks more honest that way
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Also post pics where you're in action, engaged in an activity you like, write about activities you enjoy, show yourself doing those things
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NO: Guns, dead animals, motorcycles, trucks or other vehicles you wish to show off
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No pics that include other women, no matter who they are. I'd try to leave male friends out as well.
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Don't talk about being lonely, wanting to share your life with someone, nothing emotional, sounds needy, that comes later
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No need to come with your life story, they're reading your profile to see if you're an interesting person today, not where you came from
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Do what I did and sign in as the opposite sex (sorry, been assuming you're a man looking for a woman), read their dumb profiles, don't do those things
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Once you get it down, splatter that profile across several websites. You catch more fish with multiple hooks in the water.
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One final note, when you get matches, chat very briefly, ask for the date. Women out there are seriously frustrated with guys that seem to only want to talk, talk, talk. Get that date set before someone bolder asks her out!
Sorry for making so many assumptions. If this doesn't help you, maybe someone else can get use out of it. For context, I was 50-53 and pulling so many dates the neighbors were making fun of me over all the women in and out of here. Also, I'm short and scrawny, non-rich and my vehicles are 20+ years old. :)
Some of these are definitely up to your own personal preference.
Plenty of MAGA chicks on Tinder in my area that, themselves, have pics of their guns, dead animals and trucks. I'm sure they'd love all the country bros that do the same.
But then again, I don't think anyone on Lemmy wants to attract those people.
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NO: Guns, dead animals, motorcycles, trucks or other vehicles you wish to show off
Dang it so no train pics I take it?
No pics that include other women, no matter who they are. I’d try to leave male friends out as well.
See I've heard the opposite advise. A non-cover photo of you with some friends including non-male friends if you have any indicates you're not a loner and might have some idea of how to talk to other humans
Other people in your pics brings up to many assumptions about who's who, what your relationships are, all that mess.
The thing is to avoid pics that beg the question. Does that make sense?
Huh. Well. I guess I'm doing everything right then.
Maybe the photos need a lot of work. That will be challenging.
Get lots of pics! Can't ever tell which ones will work out!
If none are working out? Take a long hard look in the mirror. What can you fix or improve? I've rarely met another human that couldn't do something to be more attractive. Do that thing for yourself, not some anonymous stranger.
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Grindr doesn't really have a "match" system. You can send a message to anyone whose profile you can see (unless/until they block you). Think of it less like a traditional dating app and more like an interactive billboard of horny people in your area.
Why isn't there a straight version of that lol
Multiple answers to that question:
- There are women on Grindr - in my experience, mostly trans women or m/f couples looking for a third. So men can find straight sex on Grindr, but it's rare. Women are definitely a scant minority of the users.
- There are plenty of "straight" men on Grindr. You'd have to ask them why - I usually block them.
- The reason why dating apps marketed towards straight people don't allow this kind of messaging (and the reason there aren't more women on Grindr) is because women, generally speaking, won't put up with the same kind of shit that gay men will. A straight dating app where men could send horny messages and dick pics to every woman they saw wouldn't have any women using it.
The world lost untold weirdness when Craigslist took down their personals section, cause that's where my down dirty girlfriends were getting the dick back in the day. You could go on and have your pick of dozens of guys in an hour. Generally they were real guys. Most were awful but they found some diamonds in the rough.
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Or it would have the horniest, sluttiest women in the world just like Grindr has me 🤷♂️
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You have no idea how much I wish I was more gay.
Sending you my gayest thoughts.
More gay? More gay than what?
More gay than you! HA!
Why would the first one work on me. Do i have no self preservation instinct left.
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