this post was submitted on 20 Oct 2025
116 points (98.3% liked)

Ask Lemmy

35207 readers
1147 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !askusa@discuss.online


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Give me your wordplay and obscure culture references, I love them all.

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] DisguisedJoker@lemmy.world 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

A joke in Spanish: ¿Como se dice "autobus" en alemán? "subanstrujenbajen"

Explanation: The question asks how to say "bus" in German. The answer is a form of the words "get on, squeeze, get off" made to look/sound like faux German.

[–] Zombiepirate@lemmy.world 1 points 12 hours ago

I didn't know alemán was another way to say "German." I play early music, and it's also a type of song known as a "German dance," so that makes a lot of sense.

[–] reksas@sopuli.xyz 4 points 15 hours ago

Finland and sweden were having a competition about which language is the most beautiful. Finland was let to choose the sentence and "saari, saari, heinäsaari, heinäsaaren neito". In swedish its "Ö, ö, hö ö, hö ö mö"

(in english its "island, island, grassy island, grassy island's maiden")

[–] melsaskca@lemmy.ca 4 points 17 hours ago

I hope this isn't racist as I never thought it was. Best told to an English speaker who only speaks that one language.

A Chinese man is walking down the street and he notices a Chinese friend of his on the other side of the street, walking the opposite way. He yells across the street to his friend "(do fake Chinese talk)". His friend yells back "(more fake Chinese talk)". He answers him back with more fake Chinese talk while starting to laugh. He then laughs like a loon as if it is the best joke he's ever heard.

There is no joke to get but only pretending there was one. Stupid and absurd, I know.

[–] Luffy879@lemmy.ml 2 points 17 hours ago

Hibbedi bobbedi hopfn, jetzt hoats a mal dei Fotzn.

[–] mech@feddit.org 12 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

After the workers are finished, Mandy from Saxony comes home to see the result of the house renovation.
The entire floor is covered in white bread.
She shouts "What's this? I wanted parquet flooring, not baguette flooring!"

(Parquet and Baguette are pronounced exactly the same in Saxonian dialect)

[–] glorkon@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

"Was ist der Unterschied zwischen Schach und Billard?" - "Beim Schach hat man den Kö nich."

"What's the difference between chess and billiards?" - Answer is a pun, can mean both "In chess, you have the king." and "In chess, you don't have the cue." Doesn't translate at all.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 21 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

An Ulster Scots one:

"Ballymena mawn went uptae glens in Canadae yin dae"

"An he saa tae yer man in the pub: What's that thaer on tha wall?"

"An the publickan saa "Why, That's a moose"

"Ballymena man saa: "Aye? That a moose? Sure, if thats a moose then yer cats must be wile big!" "

[–] Sturgist@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

As a Canadian in Scotland, this is the number one joke I'm told by Scots. Closely followed by the statement "I've a (cousin/sister/brother/uncle/auntie etc) in Canada." I swear, it's probably 1 in 3 Scots with family in Canada.

[–] Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Here's one which only works if you know BOTH Portuguese and English:

"In Portugal it's very common for old ladies to go to a coffee place and ask for a big cock"

(Explanation: the Portuguese word for milk with coffee - "galão" - also means "big rooster". Those are the only two meanings it has in that language. However when you translate it to English you can use a certain synonym for "rooster" which can be read as having another, very different, meaning)

[–] Kennystillalive@feddit.org 80 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Two divers meet. One say "Hi" the other says "where?!"

Two hunters meet. Both of them are dead.

[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 20 points 2 days ago (3 children)
[–] Kennystillalive@feddit.org 78 points 2 days ago (7 children)

German:

  1. Joke: "Hi" is spoke like "Hai" German for shark. So when two divers meet and one says hi, the other thinks, where is the shark??

  2. Joke: "to meet" is translated in german as treffen. Treffen can also the mean to hit. So the joke goes from a freindly meet up between hunters to both of them hitting eachother while on the hunt and dying.

[–] MBech@feddit.dk 38 points 2 days ago

That is so incredibly german, holy shit.

[–] ptu@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 day ago

We also say hai in Finnish for shark

load more comments (5 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] kowanatsi@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago

life is like a cucumber, sometime in your hand sometime in your ass. Arabic/Sudanese dialect

el eisha zey el ajoura, mara fi eedak, mara fi teezahk

…..

what am i doing with my life 🙈

[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 48 points 2 days ago (4 children)

[off topic?]

Yiddish. Does not translate to Christian.

Old man goes to the same lunch counter every day and orders the exact same meal every time. Tuna fish salad on rye toast and tomato soup.

One day he walks in and orders his meal. The waiter brings it.

"Waiter, I want you to try this soup."

"I'm sorry sir, I'll get you a different bowl."

"No, I want you to try this soup!"

"I'll get the manager."

"No, I want you to try this soup!"

This goes on for five minutes and finally the waiter gives up.

"Okay, I'll try the soup. Where's the spoon?"

"Aha!"

[–] TipRing@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This works better when spoken with the appropriate inflections.

[–] tektite@slrpnk.net 19 points 2 days ago (1 children)

What really translates here for me is how exhausting customers can be.

If the server forgot to bring a spoon you could have just said that five minutes ago while the soup was still hot.

[–] Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

you could have just said

No, you could not, and that's what makes it a Jiddish joke. It's cultural, not linguistic.

[–] sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

As a stupid curious person, why couldn't you just say that in Yiddish? Aside from how it wouldn't be a funny joke anymore lol.

[–] Kornblumenratte@feddit.org 4 points 1 day ago

I don't know about Yiddish culture, but there are a lot of cultures where it would be considered extremely improper to tell someone they made a mistake because this would ring shame on them – complaining to a superior even more so. In these cultures, you have to resort to such indirect clues as described in the joke to communicate complaints.

As I understand it, this joke describes the a clash between shame based and guilt based cultures making fun of both.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ExistingConsumingSpace@midwest.social 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I didn't know this joke had Yiddish origins. Funnily enough, it was told to me by my Jewish grandmother when she was explaining in a convoluted way that I should sweep before mopping 🤣.

[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 5 points 1 day ago

One time, between classes we got on the topic of ethnic humor. The guy I told the joke to looked at me like I was insane, but the Russian immigrant woman who overheard it laughed. Someone else told me that Southern US folks would get it.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] capuccino@lemmy.world 30 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Spanish:

--Señor, mi mamá quiere saber qué vende.

--Dile a tu mamá que ceviche.

English:

--Mister, my mom wants to know what are you selling.

--Tell to your mom that ceviche.

Ceviche is, well, ceviche. In north west of México, we often say "vichi" to say "nude". "vicharse" would be "get naked", so "Dile a tu mamá que ceviche" can be a pun for "dile a tu mamá que se viche" (Tell to your mom that get naked)

[–] kambusha@sh.itjust.works 15 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (5 children)

Que le dijo un pez a otro pez?
Nada!

What did one fish say to the other? Nothing(/Swim)!

[–] capuccino@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Una estrella estrellada

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] thymos@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Dutch: Er liep een man in de woestijn en die vond een kameel, maar de kameel vond van niet.

English: A man was walking in the desert and he found a camel, but the camel found he hadn't.

I don't know, maybe it works in English too.

[–] Fiery@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I don't get it, and I speak Dutch...

[–] noughtnaut@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Well, OP didn't specify good jokes....

[–] thymos@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 day ago

Sorry, can't help you there. There's nothing less funny than explaining jokes, except maybe this joke...

[–] Goldholz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)

German joke with word play: " 'Nur noch schnell einen runter holen, dann ist Mittag' - Karl Heinz (Flackschütze)"

[–] Manfredolin@feddit.org 2 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Flak ohne ck (von FLugAbwehrKanone)

[–] Goldholz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 18 hours ago

Legastenie lässt grüßen

[–] Lumidaub@feddit.org 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

"Hello, I'd like one of those smurfs from up on that shelf, please."
"Want me to get one down for you?"
"Sure, if I can get a smurf in return?"

[–] leadore@lemmy.world 20 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Spanish wordplay: ¿Por qué está feliz la escoba? Porque siempre barriendo.

Translation: Why is the broom happy? Because it's always sweeping (barriendo = sweeping, sounds like va riendo = goes around laughing)

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Lumidaub@feddit.org 17 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

No matter how sloshed you may be, Goethe was a poet.

Tap for spoiler"Dicht" is a word for "drunk/pissed/sloshed". "Dichter" is both "poet" and "more sloshed".

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 15 points 2 days ago (4 children)

「野菜を食べやさい!」

I think a close-enough approximation (which isn’t close at all) would be “eat your veggies, peas.”

[–] Limonene@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

In the garden, there are two chickens.

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

庭には、鶏が二羽いる。

I almost forgot about that one!

English is squeezing the last scraps of Japanese out of me. :(

[–] EtnaAtsume@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

5回も誤解した

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] CiderApplenTea@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Who's the stinkiest Norse god? Gar-loki

Works better in Dutch, I swear

[–] dreugeworst@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 day ago

3 students share an apartment and 2 of them study a lot but the third spends most his nights partying. The 2 studious housemates decide to pull a prank on him, and one night when he comes home they are waiting for him next to the bedroom door wearing white sheets. One of the friends says 'welcome friend, I am Peter!'. The other says 'welcome friend, I am Paul'. The drunk house mate looks at them and says 'Colleagues! would you mind stepping aside? I am Lazarus!'

yeah, that doesn't translate... in Dutch, the names refer to St peter and St Paul and both end in -us as well: Petrus and Paulus. Also, 'being Lazarus' means being very drunk.

load more comments
view more: next ›