Truck broke down halfway across the country so our shipment of raw materials for the next production run is delayed? Shit, guess we’ll find out in a month from now. Another week of sitting around and smoking cigarettes it is, then!

Our contractor metrics are shitting the bed and customers are furious? Lmao I guess we’ll find out in a month when the letters arrive in the physical mail and resolve the problem in another year when we find out who to call.

Fuck it, did my hour of work today, time to get drunk. And earn enough to single handedly support a family of 4 with multiple homes, vacation cabins, multiple vehicles, and yearly international destination vacations lmfao.

Oh what’s that, it’s time to retire at 50 with my company funded pension, social security funded to the gills, flush retirement accounts, and rental property income.

[–] myrrh@ttrpg.network 34 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

...just-in-time supply chains weren't a thing back then; robust businesses stocked and planned sufficient lead time not to risk lean operations on stochastic hiccups...

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[–] glimmer_twin@hexbear.net 33 points 3 weeks ago

sicko-wistful

[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 26 points 3 weeks ago

I get stoned at work, some things did improve I suppose

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[–] AOCapitulator@hexbear.net 77 points 3 weeks ago

I wish violence upon the creator of these words, holy shit

[–] Horse@lemmygrad.ml 75 points 3 weeks ago

the new crop of adults are doing a perfectly normal thing that we will now frame as bizarrely as possible

the standby of journalism for longer than i've been alive

[–] robotElder2@hexbear.net 74 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Everyone involved in publishing this should be worked to death in a labor camp.

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[–] BeamBrain@hexbear.net 67 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

Nano-retirements involve taking a one to two day break from work every week.

Pico-retirements involve taking a sixteen hour break from work every day.

Femto-retirements involve taking a thirty to sixty minute break for lunch every day.

Atto-retirements involve taking a five minute break from work to use the restroom every few hours.

[–] GuerrillaRat@hexbear.net 25 points 3 weeks ago

I need to take a 2.5 hour break from work tomorrow to get some chores sorted out, what is the most appropriate scientific term for this level of retirement?

[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 25 points 3 weeks ago

Hey beambrain I'm going to the gas station for my femto you want anything?

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[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 67 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

So, a vacation?

[–] Goun@lemmy.ml 42 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Half a vacation, actually

[–] SirQuack@feddit.nl 26 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

I like two weeks of vacation. Just enough to lose track of time, and just small enough so you can do multiple per year. With 25 holidays / year I get two smaller vacations and a few days off here and there.

[–] TheBroodian@hexbear.net 33 points 3 weeks ago

Tell us you aren't American without saying "I'm not American"

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[–] darklamer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 30 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)

I don't think so, a vacation would be longer than just one to two weeks.

[–] Xiisadaddy@lemmygrad.ml 43 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

are you european because this sounds so european to say

[–] Goun@lemmy.ml 27 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

We have 20 days a year here at my non european country

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 27 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (7 children)

That's the EU minimum. Which is two 2 week vacations per 12 months or one 4 week vacation.

UK gives 28 days which translates to 5.6 weeks paid leave per year.

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[–] CyborgMarx@hexbear.net 31 points 3 weeks ago

lmao not in shithole America

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[–] Dort_Owl@hexbear.net 62 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

matt-jokerfied SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP LET PEOPLE LIVE OUTSIDE OF WORK

[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 27 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Capitalists be like: bugs-no

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[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 60 points 3 weeks ago

i choose to interpret this as "working conditions suck so much that gen z didn't know vacations already had a name"

also the author needs to be mulched

[–] take_five_moments@hexbear.net 59 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

What is uhhh a vacation?

[–] plinky@hexbear.net 62 points 3 weeks ago

microvacation is when you visit restroom, but don't clock out

[–] sorter_plainview@lemmy.today 40 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

That's for people with money. Not for peasants.

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[–] hotcouchguy@hexbear.net 47 points 3 weeks ago

Reading this gave me a micro-stroke, going to have to lie down and self-induce a nano-coma before I commit a pico-omnicide on this guy specifically

[–] 9to5@hexbear.net 45 points 3 weeks ago

Microdosing my retirement everynight for 8h so that I make it through the work day

[–] XxFemboy_Stalin_420_69xX@hexbear.net 45 points 3 weeks ago

writing an article in which i pretend to never have heard of a vacation and then looking at myself in the mirror and saying "yeah i'm a valuable part of society" because i'm a journalist, ie, one of the stupidest people on the planet

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 45 points 3 weeks ago

barbara-pit Into the Room for Serious Journalists you go.

[–] CyborgMarx@hexbear.net 45 points 3 weeks ago

Capitalist ideologues trying to erase the very concept of vacation

[–] Cruxifux@feddit.nl 43 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

The only reason I have Twitter is because every once in a while I see something written that’s so stupid that I have to find the person on Twitter that wrote it so I can verbally abuse them for being so fucking stupid. This is one of those times.

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[–] Meltyheartlove@hexbear.net 43 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Get laid off and no one wants to hire you despite the low wages so your employment gap grows long enough that porky decides you are not fit to work following which porky makes posts of accusing you of being lazy and going on a vacation you can't afford while they are on a paid vacation that never ends. agony-deep

[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 38 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I’m doing macro retirement (being unemployed for several months straight)

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[–] SpicyLizards@reddthat.com 38 points 3 weeks ago

Can't even have a break without a new derogatory capitalist name being coined.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 36 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I want to punch whoever wrote this so often and so hard that I will need to order gauntlets or something to keep my hands safe. And I want to do it on a paid 'micro retirement'.

[–] vegeta1@hexbear.net 34 points 3 weeks ago

The writer of this and all the grindset merchants should be forced to work in a Japanese black company.

[–] krolden@lemmy.ml 33 points 3 weeks ago

Unpaid of course

[–] VILenin@hexbear.net 30 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

Hey look, it’s the latest bullshit portmanteau invented by worthless thinkpiece “writers” to describe a concept that already has a normal word for it

Anyone else love to bare-back while planning their micro-retirement after a long day of quiet-quitting?

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[–] RedWizard@hexbear.net 29 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

LOL is this boomers unable to detect irony? Calling a 2 week vacation a "micro retirement" reads like pure irony or satire...

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[–] roux@hexbear.net 26 points 3 weeks ago

I do this but it's because I get fired once every 12 to 18 months.

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 26 points 3 weeks ago

honk It's called a vacation

[–] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 24 points 3 weeks ago

That's a fucking vacation

[–] inTheShadowOf@hexbear.net 23 points 3 weeks ago

Are we not supposed to use PTO...?

[–] Rojo27@hexbear.net 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

One to two week break every year. Fucking cursed. I barely ever use my time off so now using it is a "micro-retirement"? gulag

[–] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 22 points 3 weeks ago

every year

Or year and a half!

[–] Guamer@hexbear.net 22 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

So an average of a week and a half every 15 months, roughly 2.4%

My cup runneth over!

[–] queermunist@lemmy.ml 21 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

~~Wall.~~

Actually I choose to believe this was written by AI.

[–] AOCapitulator@hexbear.net 29 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

that crossed my mind too, but even if it was written by AI I think a person chose to publish this

[–] queermunist@lemmy.ml 23 points 3 weeks ago

Probably someone that's mad that their staff keeps asking for time off.

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