I already bitched about this in the vegan theory club cooking discord bub I'm still bent the fuck out of shape over it.
Ok, so my kid's birthday party was yesterday and the last 2 times I wasn't able to eat the cake because it was made with extra helping of animals. I just sat their on my phone and took a few pictures or whatever. I helped with set up and tear down.
We are also going broke because I'm too fucking stupid to hold down a job and after over a year and a half of trying to find a job, we are at the point where I am considering getting rid of the rest of our streaming services and pull our youngest out of daycare. We are barely surviving on a teacher's salary right now.
In the past, my partner has gone all out on our kids' parties but I was working so it was fine. This time, I wanted to try to save money where we could. In the past, my partner would get a cake from a local bakery that costs like $80 and only 1/4 would get eaten and I'd throw the rest away 2 months later because it got forgotten in the back of our garage fridge.
So this year I wanted to kill 2 vegan birds with one stone and make my kid's birthday cake. I could make it for way cheaper and also sub in vegan ingredients.
I buy all the ingredients and plan on making it Saturday. My mother-in-law decides to offer to make a cake for my kid after finding out we aren't spending $80 on a cake. I already bought the ingredients so I politely say no thanks. Because I am saving money, not wasting it. And because I wanted to enjoy cake at my kid's birthday party.
I got up early yesterday, put my earbuds in and threw on some baking metal. To be fair it was a box cake mix and the frosting was also pre-made. I was gonna do this as a test run before autistic hyper-focus takes over and I proceed to deep dive into making the perfect vegan cake. So I mix it up and bake it and do the toothpick test and it comes out clean. I wait for it to cool and frost it and it's good. Life is good. We good.
Well, It was on the softer side of done. My mother-in-law goes to cut the cake and it crumbles. She then proceeds, in front of like 15 people, to tell me that my cake sucks and I should have just let her make it because it wouldn't suck. In front of me, my partner, our kids, our friends, etc. So that's great.
I spiral, because I do that. and I'm still processing it. She seemed like she wanted to go out of her way to make a deal about it because she knows I'm vegan and likes to call it weird or whatever when she can.
I know this is all over a stupid cake but she really could have just laughed it off when it was falling apart instead of slopping it on to everyone's plate like she was a lunchlady in the 6th circle of hell or something.
That's it. That's my rant. I'm mostly just hoping that I could get it off my chest and move on.
I am always looking for recipes so if anyone has a good cake recipe that can adapt to flavors like vanilla or chocolate and such, I'm definitely interested. A tiny caveat is that the cake mix and frosting used palm oil and I'm really trying to avoid that because of how palm farming wrecked the environment.
Yes, ma'am!
. I hope everyone is doing well! Anywho, here's the new one.
Took my mental health day on Friday as prescribed by my therapist and gingerbrat. It was actually pretty nice. I did light laundry chores and made it to about halfway through the 4th(chronological) movie in the Mad Max franchise. I did work on a bit of code stuff but it was correcting typos in my business sites. Nothing too brainy. I also gave Satisfactory another attempt and I think I still hate it.
Then Saturday came and I got hit with a huge wave of depression all over again... I can't really afford to take a day off a week to try and be happy, just to turn around and be more depressed than I was before. I think a lot of it is still tied to my shitty job, my education going to waste, and me just wanting to get out of this daily work grind bullshit. I need to stop setting my worth at what my income is and I don't know how. I don't want to be like generational wealth rich or whatever but I'd just like this dumb business to take off but no one wants or needs a websites and no one wants to pay the real price for one.
I wrote another mobile app in 2 days again. It was inspired by those dumb digital business cards that use NFC to send your info to someone else's phone. This one doesn't have NFC because Android sucks and we can't have nice things. But it does have a QR code generator in it that creates one for each url you add. Think of it sort of as an Android app QR code equivalent to Linktree. But that was how I realized I was back in burnout. So, there is that.
Next stage of burnout is me getting fired.