His first move would be to throw a hissy fit, collapse as soon as you touched him, feign a heart attack and threaten to sue you .... all while shouting that you're going to be deported
this post was submitted on 30 Mar 2025
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If he got in your face and you had your hand up and it just barely touched his chest he'd be yelling "CALL 911!! THATS ASSAULT!!!"
Which is why as a person of colour (I'm a big brown Indigenous Canadian) I will never engage with people like this .... because I know that if this happened, there is a high likelihood that the police and courts would take his version seriously.
“What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.”
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Either that or since concealed carry is legal in a ton of states just start firing blindly in every direction and then basically everything you said
Typical Murican. Talks a big talk but stays home when their country is being taken over by actual fascists.
People that act like this voted for the fascists.
Yep they’re the useful idiots who will use their guns to defend tyrant billionaires racists.
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If you have to say you're a badass, guess what...
Real gangsta ass niggas dont flex nuts, cause real gangsta ass niggas know they got em.
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Those are war corgis.
I myself have a battle Pug. Come and pet it, Harkkonen.
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Just wild that some losers need to advertise how dumb they are.
"I'm about to shit my pants from eye contact with strangers so I need clothing with printed letters to convince you otherwise"
If you need an AR-15 to feel safe at Target, the problem is you....
Or you're a character in Fallout and there are Raiders in the Super Duper Mart
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Yeah. Just do what normal autistic people like me do. Put earbuds in both ears.
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So many assholes in photo
We had a saying in my country which goes roughly like this: "It's not the dog that barks which bites"
I'd say it applies here, and I ain't talking about the corgies.
We have something similar: we'd say someone is "all bark, no bite".
In Dutch we have that saying too. "Blaffende honden bijten niet." Barking dogs don't bite.
I couldn't imagine wearing something like this. Honestly, shirts that say anything are kind of out there for me.
It’s like a car covered with bumper stickers. It’s mental illness. Unhealthy fear and rage leaking out around the edges and corrupting the facade of decency.
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Does anyone ever think the guys with anything at all like that on their clothing have forgotten how to be violent? Did we need a reminder? Or does this guy just want to be a typical posturing, aggressive, "alpha male" maga shitstain and be certain no one forgets it?
Does anyone ever think the guys with anything at all like that on their clothing have forgotten how to be violent?
I don't think he's forgotten - I think he's old and fat and has mostly lost the ability to be violent, except maybe to his wife. A young, fit man would beat the shit out of him and he knows it. IMHO that's a big reason gun nuts are so into their guns, because it compensates for their physical weakness.
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That protruding blob on the back of his neck isn't fat, it's actually a bonus concealed weapon slot.
I'LL CRANK MY HOG TO THIS, BROTHER, AROOOO
These are the same people who own a big lifted truck and then put a giant sticker on the window that says “CHEVY” just in case you or they forgot what they are driving.
Some version of a window-wide US flag with the angry eagle, a Gadsden snake sticker, a gun maker sticker, an AR silhouette variant sticker with a juvenile anti-lib slogan like “my AR says fuck your lib tears” and of course the NRA sticker and a military service branch sticker.
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What if someone threatens his corgis tho
Dude I'll jump in to protect the corgis
You've never met a corgi huh? They don't need help they'll nip the shit out of people they like and downright attack people they don't. The queen had literal warnings provided to people who entered her residence because they bit so many worlds leaders.
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Gravy Seal. Proclaiming what a badass he is but probably starts wheezing just making it to the table from the Cracker Barrel parking lot.
my tits are masculine and quite supple, thanks
Don't forget for one second just because I'm not a graphic designer doesn't mean I don't get constantly told I fucked up centered justification.
Somebody forgot to center their edgy graphic.
It’s entirely possible that his brain didn’t forget how to be violent but it’s clear his body did. So this is basically a billboard indicating, “if you sneak up on me and restrict my arms, you can probably find my concealed weapon.”
This reminds me of a buddy I used to have. He wore jackets exactly like this and even had two little dogs. He was a Vietnam vet and did, in fact, kill a whole bunch of people during the war. Something he never forgave himself for.
One time I asked him what that was like. He thought for a minute and said, "When you have your weapon trained on someone, for a split second you have the power of God in your hands. You get to decide if that person lives or dies. Nobody should have that kind of power."
He was a character but a good dude overall.
Peak American cringe
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