RPGMemes

"Drenched from head to toe in the blood of your opponent, you stand over their crumpled body."

"Sweet! I loot the corpse. What do you I find?"

"A small note: 'Note to self: get cure for horrible blood plague.'"

"...fuck."

DM: Trying his best to write an emotional moment

Player: I play the flute while I loot the dead kid's body

This reminded me of how system really affects player behavior. I was playing a game where doing some things would trigger a check to avoid consequences.

There was a lot of "I'm gonna shoot him" -> "ok but you'll have to roll for humanity loss" -> "...fine, nevermind, I'll talk to him instead"

"Great I'll put it in the bag of holding. How much is it worth? I rolled a 20, you have to tell me"

Remember to save these for when the party are getting a little too "morally grey", because unless you're running a "dark and gritty" campaign then it will discourage them from ever wanting to get in a fight!

Be proud. You were a fine warrior. Your only mistake was your choice of master. Let the winds lift you, to a higher place.

And then there's my fighter, who killed three pirates after hearing about their hopes and dreams.

You loot the kobold's body. You find a note that reads:

"Dear Krag, I miss you so much, and I pray for you to return soon. Our clutch of eggs is due to hatch, and more than anything I want the first thing they see is their devoted father..."

"My dearest Delilah, how I long to sit with you and our beautiful daughter..."

Okay sure but this guy jumped out of a bush with a flaming axe and said he'd eat our spleens. And Vilrod here identified the axe as +1 against spleens.

... this list contains like 3 items phrased differently ~7 times each.

"This person had a family/friends" "This person was supporting someone else" "This person liked their pets"

repeat ...