this post was submitted on 08 Jun 2026
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Chapotraphouse

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[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 38 points 12 hours ago (3 children)

I'm super excited for this. With just 100 transplants, I can have the largest foreskin on Earth. A weighted blanket wherever I go.

[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 23 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 30 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Soon I will be able to shield my eyes from negativity like yours. Guess why.

[–] DogThatWentGorp@hexbear.net 16 points 12 hours ago (4 children)

Really excited about my paragliding potential they said I'll have after foreskin #300 gets installed.

[–] FloridaBoi@hexbear.net 13 points 11 hours ago

Feels like a minor supe from The Boys

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 19 points 12 hours ago

You know that worm from Dune? That's what I want for me.

[–] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 11 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Remember that post about the Olympics where people were injecting silicone into their dicks to give them more circumference because each % increase in girth yielded a proportional increase in ski jump distance?

happybadger's foreskin will soon provide enough additional circumference and aerodynamic lift to exceed orbital velocity. we're going to beat SpaceX to Mars on the backs of pig foreskins and sheer gumption

[–] DogThatWentGorp@hexbear.net 2 points 6 hours ago

That's how you do it. Nothing but hog. Engineering elegance.

[–] chgxvjh@hexbear.net 12 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

For that you really want the tanuki ball sack transplant

[–] DogThatWentGorp@hexbear.net 6 points 12 hours ago