this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2026
92 points (100.0% liked)

Chapotraphouse

14320 readers
726 users here now

Banned? DM Wmill to appeal.

No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer

Slop posts go in c/slop. Don't post low-hanging fruit here.

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] ashestoashes@lemmygrad.ml 7 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

It was an intentional choice of words because I find it to be incredibly disrespecful. Put bluntly, transition is a personal thing. It's a lesson I've learnt is you can't transition someone else for them. You could suggest it, but ultimately it's something they have to do for themselves. When someone passes away, you just have to let them rest.

[–] SerialExperimentsGay@hexbear.net 18 points 22 hours ago (2 children)

When someone passes away before she could live as herself outside of her online presence, you find it ok to misgender her forever and to call transfeminity grotesque. Got it. Now please fuck off back to incelgrad.

[–] ashestoashes@lemmygrad.ml 12 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

If someone passes away before they come out, I'm sorry, I know it may seem harsh, but you can't force them to come out in death. A deceased person has no agency. We have no way of knowing what they're thinking, and we can't retrospectively make decisions for them. That sucks. I don't like it when people die. But it's not respectful to theorize about what they might have done had they not passed away.

You've maliciously misrepresented my argument and claimed I called transfeminity grotesque. At no point did I say that, nor anything that could be charitably misinterpreted as that. This shows me you have no intention of engaging in good faith. I'm a trans woman myself, so the topic is personal to me, hence the strong use of language.

Have a good day.

[–] Kumikommunism@hexbear.net 2 points 21 hours ago

you find it ok to misgender her forever

You are deciding this, not the person who passed away.

call transfeminity grotesque

That's clearly not what they were using that word for.