this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2026
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Chapotraphouse
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It was an intentional choice of words because I find it to be incredibly disrespecful. Put bluntly, transition is a personal thing. It's a lesson I've learnt is you can't transition someone else for them. You could suggest it, but ultimately it's something they have to do for themselves. When someone passes away, you just have to let them rest.
When someone passes away before she could live as herself outside of her online presence, you find it ok to misgender her forever and to call transfeminity grotesque. Got it. Now please fuck off back to incelgrad.
If someone passes away before they come out, I'm sorry, I know it may seem harsh, but you can't force them to come out in death. A deceased person has no agency. We have no way of knowing what they're thinking, and we can't retrospectively make decisions for them. That sucks. I don't like it when people die. But it's not respectful to theorize about what they might have done had they not passed away.
You've maliciously misrepresented my argument and claimed I called transfeminity grotesque. At no point did I say that, nor anything that could be charitably misinterpreted as that. This shows me you have no intention of engaging in good faith. I'm a trans woman myself, so the topic is personal to me, hence the strong use of language.
Have a good day.
fuck off
You are deciding this, not the person who passed away.
That's clearly not what they were using that word for.