this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2025
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I've been talking about this with my therapist but curious to hear what other people think. I feel like being overweight makes me look more masculine. I lost 60 pounds since last fall and I feel like it's much easier to see myself as feminine, though it's still not great, in part because I've still got like 40lbs left to reach my goal weight.

I think part of the problem is that I am tall with a fairly large frame, so the weight just makes me even more stocky and Tony Soprano-esque. Plus I've just come to associate my being overweight with being unattractive, and my concept of femininity is very caught up in my fear of not being attractive post-transition

Anyway 4 dollars a pound

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[–] bubbalu@hexbear.net 11 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

There's two core factors as I understand it. First beauty norms are very gendered and center heavily around weight and body composition. There is a higher pressure on women to be "thin" (denormalize that idea), and it does inflect how we as trans people relate to our bodies.

Second, fat distribution is controlled by sex hormones which means it is alterable. Once your hormones stabilize, body weight fluctuations disproportionately affect 'incorrectly' stored fat---to different degrees for different people.

Losing weight during HRT, particularly for transfeminine people, is a double whammy since you are meeting gendered beauty norms AND altering a secondary sex characteristic.

It is a completely valid thing to notice and feel euphoric about! At the same time, don't overextend it into fatphobia or self-hatred. Let go of internal fat shaming because gaining weight now will probably turn you into an ass monster! ;)