this post was submitted on 07 Oct 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] fearlessseraphim@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 day ago

I don't like holding babies or even small dogs. I dropped someone's baby once as a kid, but from a short distance, and when no one was looking too. She hit her head (not too hard either, but caused a thud) on the web of an office chair, where the wheels are. I tried letting her down slowly but she kept squirming all over trying to get off. She then started to cry as she went to where my mom was and I lied that she was getting emotional of wanting to see her mom. Never once again I held a baby. They squirm so much! 😩 I'll hold some dogs bc they have a bit more resilience and instinct when falling. So it's kinda her fault, but mostly mine because I wasn't being careful or how to hold a baby properly 😩.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

"You're right. Spiking the kid like a football player who just scored a touchdown isn't technically 'dropping.'"

yeeted to tha ground

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 19 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Parents are projecting when they do this. I hold this thing and it brings me such joy, here, you must feel this joy.

Many people without kids who have never held a kid at most feel a little curiosity at the new experience, but don't feel that mass of endorphins that the parent or previous parent gets when holding a newborn.

Until I had my own, holding someone else's kid was to appease them, not because it made me overflow with joy.

[–] WanakaTree@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 day ago

I have a baby now and I try really hard to make clear to people that if you'd like to hold her you're welcome to but it's also totally fine if you don't want to. Some people are so excited to, others want nothing to do with it. I get it either way

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I've got a kid and had that nervousness. I remember when we left the hospital, it felt like it was too easy, like "we just made this kid, an actual person, and you're just letting us leave and take it home with us!? Isn't that irresponsible??"

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 day ago

imposter syndrome with new parents is TOTALLY a thing

[–] PM_ME_VINTAGE_30S@anarchist.nexus 19 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Seriously I absolutely do not understand putting your child's safety into someone else's hands for shits and giggles. Like I'm honored you trust me that much, but...maybe don't trust my feeble body lol πŸ˜†

[–] socsa@piefed.social 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

It's a trap. The moment you hold the baby on your own, it steals your soul and gives you brain chemicals to make new babies. That's how baby is formed

[–] cronenthal@discuss.tchncs.de 32 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Actually happened to me. Not a full drop, just head on table. I was never offered a baby to hold again.

[–] Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com 21 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 10 points 2 days ago

If it was just head, they never would have had the baby in the first place.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 1 points 1 day ago

Are you looking for an apprentice?

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 20 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Parent: "You won't"

Lemmy User:

This aint my dad its a cell phone!

[–] socsa@piefed.social 3 points 1 day ago

YOURE NOT MY SUPERVISOR

[–] spacegoat@lemmy.world 23 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I hate holding babies. I don’t want to hold your baby

[–] cass80@programming.dev 16 points 2 days ago

I refuse as well. When asked why I say it's too much of a liability. The unspoken part is I don't care enough to take the chance.

[–] tomatoisaberry@lemmy.world 18 points 2 days ago

I always reply with, "No, thanks, I've already eaten."

[–] notnowimbatin@fedinsfw.app 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

What if he knows I used to be a giant piece of shit?

[–] PM_ME_SOMETHING@fedinsfw.app 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] StabbingSky@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

They still are a giant piece of shit, but they used to be too.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I'm afraid StabbingSky thinks people can't change.

[–] StabbingSky@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)


i have some news for you

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Sometimes they do get dropped. Just look at JD Vance.

[–] sidebro@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 days ago

Should have dropped him harder

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)
[–] Snapz@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

"You won't" is a thing bad parents say right before their friend who was nervous or disinterested in holding their baby, drops it.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 2 points 1 day ago

Just a little drop. Just to see how it feels.

[–] capt_wolf@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Dropped one once. Was mid transfer with his sister and he decided to start squirming. Reflexes kicked in and I caught him mid fall. That was over 20 years ago and I'm still terrified.

[–] TrackenDaKracken@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

It's not as scary as it seems, and quite a bit of fun.

Don't be afraid to try.

Source: Am dad. But, it's been a long time since I held a baby. Not that I think anything has changed about it in the intervening years.

[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Then you're legally responsible for the death of a child.

Don't worry tho, you're legally responsible if your actions or lack of care kill anyone - you should be used to it be now.

[–] StabbingSky@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 days ago

Infants are pretty bouncy, so it'll probably be fine.

[–] Scuzzm0nkey@lemmy.world 0 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Everyone drops a baby, it's how you react afterward that's important. I'm a fan of scooping them back up before anyone notices personally.

"Hey can you hold my baby?"

"Sure.. for a bit"

[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 0 points 2 days ago

Yeah, I'm good.