Dear god video games have gone too far this time. I was ok with kids spending countless hours at the screen, gratuitous sex and violence and all the cursing. But making kids want to move to Florida CAN NOT BE TOLERATED!!!!
this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2026
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Look at these leftist parents wanting to protect their trans kids.
Never in a million years would I let my kid transition... to being a Floridian.
Sadly I was Assigned Floridian at Birth, AFAB.
There's two too many Fs on my birth certificate, anyone know how to remove them?
Son, come here. your mother and I want to talk to you. we were cleaning your room and we..
(sobs)
(mother consoles dad)
I found a brochure for Tampa!
(mother cries out "whhhyyy")
Tampa?? son, are you a gay?
Tampa is the gateway man. Next it’ll be Miami then full blown Jacksonville
Why are you NOT gay?
Don't do it, kids. It's not as great as it seems. Bikinis, cocaine, alligators, cocaine, Miami, beaches, Disney World, cocaine...
Truly, though, as a 30 year Florida resident, the last 10 years living in the PNW have been such a real positive change in my life.
I only lived in Florida for like 6 years. But that's enough to know that sums up Florida. I would just add transients and elderly to the list
This is the first time I've laughed at a The Onion post. Keep it up.