For more fun and games, you can refer to your wife as your "ex-girlfriend".
this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2026
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I often say: "Be careful, I only have one wife"
I though this is a joke about re-marrying quickly, but nope.
Doesn't*
Stories*
It's*
Garbled
This is some damn fine shitpost
You lost me at “story’s.”
They lost me at 'way'.
Huh
Well, before my wife died, we had an argument about me talking about stuff referring to it as, "before my wife died" solely because until she dies its always before my wife died.
You could fix this joke by instead saying "before my wife's death" or "before the death of my wife", and having her just say "that's very disrespectful".
But why would your wife say "it's very disrespectful to refer to them that way"? That doesn't make sense either
It already doesn't make grammatical sense because your wife hasn't died, so you can't refer to it happening in the past tense - you'd have to say "before my wife dies" which ruins the joke.
Bedore my wife will have died
You're not wrong Walter, you're just an asshole
Died is the past tense of the word die. I think in this case they are indeed wrong.
It's ok to say "I loved my wife, I still do, but I did previously too." Since the love occurred in the past tense that makes sense, but since her death has not occurred I do not believe OP is grammatically correct.
Whippin' out Mitch Hedberg to win an argument is the best internetting I'm gonna get to see today
Is this like how I used to introduce my first ex wife to people as "My First Wife" while we were still very much married?
For some reason she did not find it as amusing as I did? I wonder if its funny now?
I like my wife too much to make jokes like that. That's kind of awful, really.
I like you’re wife too
I'm with your wife on that one, that's creepy.
I like that you respect their pronouns.
You can talk about the past without reminding others of that particular memory. They're all thinking it anyway.
You misunderstand. Their wife is still alive so Everything is still "before she died"
"before she dies" English has a conjugation for that... There shouldn't be a misunderstanding. What a weird post.
But they're speaking of their wife in the future tense as it'll be a future event. That's the point and why she'd find it disrespectful
Yeah nah I'm not disagreeing, it's just really weird as well. 🚩