this post was submitted on 06 May 2026
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Programmer Humor

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[–] pewpew@feddit.it 4 points 6 days ago

That feeling when your code compiles after a long session of refactoring

[–] umbraroze@slrpnk.net 5 points 6 days ago

It goes WAY back.

The Apollo Guidance Computer software had a routine called KISSING. ...about LM-CM docking, of course.

You saw the opening scene of Apollo 13 and thought only the astronauts used horny references in regards to the docking? Think again! So did the programmers.

[–] skuzz@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 6 days ago

cherry-pick the tip

git reset --hard HEAD

and on and on

[–] ikidd@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] Hupf@feddit.org 2 points 6 days ago

Plug it, play it, burn it, rip it, drag it, drop it,...

[–] IndustryStandard@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago
[–] explodIng_lIme@lemmy.world 75 points 1 week ago (4 children)
[–] snooggums@piefed.world 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Kenny2999@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] urushitan@kakera.kintsugi.moe 5 points 1 week ago

Insert, upsert

[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

there are so many links that i've clicked expecting to be horny that turned out to be IT server stuff >:|

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

i feel that this is not appropriate for children and i want this changed to dom/sub or top/bottom. maybe dick/butt. poker/hole?

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[–] SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world 68 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

Construction is like this too.

Erection, nipples, rods, pipes, vibrators, lube, rope, caulk, penetrate, lay hardwood, and my all time favorite. “Hey Frank, come give me a reach around, I need an extra hand here”

Edit, nailing studs.

[–] DarthFreyr@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

"Get me some oil so I can tap this tight hole. You're going to need to screw it hard, and then drop a double nut on it. Make sure to keep your bush clean, or you can try sticking your finger in and twisting it around, otherwise you'll never get this hard shaft into it. And remember: if it's walking funny when you drill, try putting the tip between a pair of nuts."

Maybe a bit more machining, but it's not even a stretch to make it sound absolutely terrible. Those are all even pretty reasonable statements in context (if you know zero slang), not just isolated words.

[–] Denvil@piefed.world 25 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I love telling people who aren't from Cincinnati that I had a threeway with some strangers in a parking lot

That is, I ate a 3-way (Cincinnati chili, cheese, and spaghetti) in a parking lot on lunch break with some random plumbers who were also taking their break there

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago (2 children)

how do you know someone's from Cincinnati?

Don't worry, they'll tell you

[–] Denvil@piefed.world 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I'll have you know that Cincinnati cuisine is the absolute greatest cuisine to EVER originate in Cincinnati

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

I cannot disagree. You guys need the tautology award for tautology award winners.

[–] nymnympseudonym@piefed.social 6 points 1 week ago

Some men are born great
Some men achieve greatness
... and some are from Ohio

Political slogan from the 1840's Presidential campaign ("Tippacanoe and Tyler too!")

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[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 47 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] palordrolap@fedia.io 44 points 1 week ago (2 children)

haha forking processes and killing children

wait

[–] isVeryLoud@lemmy.ca 13 points 1 week ago

Remove child from parent using fork

:)

[–] pressanykeynow@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Daemon spawning mmm

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 37 points 1 week ago (2 children)

We used to finger our users too.

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[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oh my god I'm sorry I compiled so fast. This never happens. You're just so pretty...

[–] cbazero@programming.dev 7 points 1 week ago

I dumped my core so fast ...

[–] vrek@programming.dev 15 points 1 week ago

Unzip. Finger. Fsck. Sleep.

[–] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Linux shell also has... a thing going on.

touch
top
mount
man
fsck
[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] hancock@retrolemmy.com 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] ptu@sopuli.xyz 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)
[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Software, firmware, and hardware.

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[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 1 week ago

touch grass

[–] Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 1 week ago

I think there are 4 reasons:

  1. Most people are very horny
  2. It people are very online
  3. A lot of it people are obsessive with it, consequently easily identifiable as such.
  4. Other professions aren't as identifiable, or online.
[–] Cevilia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Just wait until you learn about buttplug.io!

[–] tauonite@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Vibe coding before it was cool

[–] kungen@feddit.nu 3 points 1 week ago

The only good kind of vibe coding*

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[–] gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

you cannot create art if you aren't horny.

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[–] Phantaloons@piefed.zip 7 points 1 week ago (3 children)
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[–] joe@lemmy.today 6 points 1 week ago

Look, most of us are just kinda repressed and low-level horny at all times

[–] Alvaro@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Keep It Stupid. Simple!

[–] Tattorack@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Wait till you get into game development. You'll be doing a lot of parent/child relationship, and killing orphans.

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 week ago

Tell me more about Alice's brother Bob's sisters.

Maybe they can help me find a new way to decompress.

[–] applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 week ago

It's all the trans girls and eggs. We tend to show up in software roles a lot, and we tend to be pretty horny.

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