That feeling when your code compiles after a long session of refactoring
Programmer Humor
Welcome to Programmer Humor!
This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!
For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.
Rules
- Keep content in english
- No advertisements
- Posts must be related to programming or programmer topics
It goes WAY back.
The Apollo Guidance Computer software had a routine called KISSING. ...about LM-CM docking, of course.
You saw the opening scene of Apollo 13 and thought only the astronauts used horny references in regards to the docking? Think again! So did the programmers.
cherry-pick the tip
git reset --hard HEAD
and on and on
Zip, unzip it.
Plug it, play it, burn it, rip it, drag it, drop it,...
Docker...
Master/slave
Finger/poke
Fsck fsck
Insert, upsert
there are so many links that i've clicked expecting to be horny that turned out to be IT server stuff >:|
i feel that this is not appropriate for children and i want this changed to dom/sub or top/bottom. maybe dick/butt. poker/hole?
Construction is like this too.
Erection, nipples, rods, pipes, vibrators, lube, rope, caulk, penetrate, lay hardwood, and my all time favorite. “Hey Frank, come give me a reach around, I need an extra hand here”
Edit, nailing studs.
"Get me some oil so I can tap this tight hole. You're going to need to screw it hard, and then drop a double nut on it. Make sure to keep your bush clean, or you can try sticking your finger in and twisting it around, otherwise you'll never get this hard shaft into it. And remember: if it's walking funny when you drill, try putting the tip between a pair of nuts."
Maybe a bit more machining, but it's not even a stretch to make it sound absolutely terrible. Those are all even pretty reasonable statements in context (if you know zero slang), not just isolated words.
I love telling people who aren't from Cincinnati that I had a threeway with some strangers in a parking lot
That is, I ate a 3-way (Cincinnati chili, cheese, and spaghetti) in a parking lot on lunch break with some random plumbers who were also taking their break there
how do you know someone's from Cincinnati?
Don't worry, they'll tell you
I'll have you know that Cincinnati cuisine is the absolute greatest cuisine to EVER originate in Cincinnati
I cannot disagree. You guys need the tautology award for tautology award winners.
Some men are born great
Some men achieve greatness
... and some are from Ohio
Political slogan from the 1840's Presidential campaign ("Tippacanoe and Tyler too!")
No touch?
No touch only cat


Do not the cat
haha forking processes and killing children
wait
Remove child from parent using fork
:)
Daemon spawning mmm
Oh my god I'm sorry I compiled so fast. This never happens. You're just so pretty...
I dumped my core so fast ...
Unzip. Finger. Fsck. Sleep.
Linux shell also has... a thing going on.
touch
top
mount
man
fsck
finger
unzip
root
touch grass
I think there are 4 reasons:
- Most people are very horny
- It people are very online
- A lot of it people are obsessive with it, consequently easily identifiable as such.
- Other professions aren't as identifiable, or online.
Just wait until you learn about buttplug.io!
Vibe coding before it was cool
The only good kind of vibe coding*
Look, most of us are just kinda repressed and low-level horny at all times
Oh, I KISS all the time!
Keep It Stupid. Simple!
Wait till you get into game development. You'll be doing a lot of parent/child relationship, and killing orphans.
Tell me more about Alice's brother Bob's sisters.
Maybe they can help me find a new way to decompress.
It's all the trans girls and eggs. We tend to show up in software roles a lot, and we tend to be pretty horny.