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This reminds me of an episode of Home Improvement. When they bought cans of food with the labels peeled off because they were pretty much free.
Tim said, 'these have no labels on them. They could be artichokes or dog food' and one of the boys (forgot who) said, ' the way mom cooks... I don't think it makes a difference'.
The obvious consequence for his actions are right there. Use the mystery cans of food against him (put them inside a pillowcase and use it to thrash the devil out of him)
This pic is so old it owes a caveman $20.
Caveman no have can opener. Caveman sad.
That's most of the next month's dinner for your kid. They get to pick out one can a night.
Real life consequences.
Yeah that turns into whatever I open you eat I hope you enjoy Spaghetti with ragu and canned peaches.
Spaghetti with peaches... Kinda sounds like something that would taste.... nice?
Go buy a canned something you know they don't like. Remove the labels and replace some of the cans with it. Require them to eat a mystery can a week.
Dog food is technically safe for human consumption.
I would say giving them one of the cans they unlabeled to eat for dinner each night is a reasonable consequence for their actions and could teach them a lesson about the need for emotional regulation at an age when the consequences are not severe.
Feeding a child dog food is child abuse and not appropriate in any situation. Though the premise is funny enough to be in a work of fiction, say in an adult sitcom on FX or some other edgy programming block.
So is gorilla kibble
Also apparently really high in protein compared to human food.
Asymmetric warfare
Well now everyone's having lucky dip dinners from now on
Nah. We're making a grocery run to get new stuff for everyone else and the shithead gets mystery cans until they're eaten.
And by "everyone", you mean "just that kid", right?
Well little Timmy, since you were SO thoughtful taking the labels out of the cans, you are going to play canned flood roulette for the next week. This means, for an entire week you pick one can at random for your dinner, and you are not allowed to have another food outside of what the can offers. In the meanwhile, the rest of us will eat your favorite things in front of you, while you are in your sad corner eating your can of food. Me and your mother are going to place bets to see how long your spirit lasts. Let the games begin
My friend's parents tried this sort of punishment mindset with him when it was a kid. He ended up grounded with increasingly draconian punishments for roughly five years because of the shockingly impressive stubbornness of all people involved until they "gave up on him" after 7th grade (yes, this literally started when he was a 2nd grader). He ended up moving out on his own at 16 and dropping out of school and didn't really have a relationship with them for a good decade and a half.
I don't really have any words of wisdom from this other than never underestimate a person's ability to defy logic. It just ended up ruining the whole family's experience for a long, long time.
Edit: I did just remember something "funny" about the whole thing. My friend didn't really know how to, or enjoy, doing a lot of things that pretty much all kids did because of his seemingly eternal grounding. And he was quite literally the palest person I have ever known because he only went outside to get on the bus for school. His parents turned him into some sort of cave person lo.l
Punishments are like the least effective way to convince/teach someone
For most kids, getting rid of something they like for a day or weekend tends to be enough of a punishment. From that story, tho? Parents were going waaaaaaaay overboard
Is your friend Butters Stotch?
Nah, he was (well is, we're still friends after 30 years) actually pretty cool unlike the South Park character. I guess it was easy to be cool when you gave no fucks about getting in trouble.
My parents attempted that with me, not the can-roulette part, but I was a picky eater, so in order to get me to eat new foods and expand my palate, they would give me food and say, you're not having anything but that. You're sitting at the table till it's done. While they ate food that I definitely did like.
They ended up giving up on it because I would sit at the table for hours on end and even sleep at the table. And due to the fact that I don't feel hunger until im basically almost fainting, I would basically put myself on the brink of feeling faint, which concerned them.
I'm no longer extremely picky. I'm still picky, but no longer to the extreme extent that I used to be.
That's an entirely different situation though. Picky eater is more of a clinical issue. And brute forcing such things never works. Kid being an asshole however, well that, that we can fix reverse assholianism.
Well it can till you end up dealing with a kid stubborn enough to harm themselves.
Then you just end up ruining your relationship with your kid for life in an attempt to harm them psychologically because your parenting skills are dog shit.
There is a galaxy of difference between a kid who thinks they can get away with being a brat with no consequences and a kid who has the level of emotional problems that can lead to self harm. Not to mention the difference between a parent who is just teaching their kid that there are consequences to their actions vs a parent who simply doesn't care about whether or not they are harming their kid with excessive punitive actions.
Yet another in a long series of examples of why I never wanted kids.
You do know that odd stuff happening kind of makes life worth living? This is a mild inconvenience in the moment but a story to tell and laugh about for decades. This is net positive by miles and miles.
I'd just cook normal recipes but with a random can whenever it called for a can of something. Then thats whats for dinner and if the kiddo don't like, he can go hungry until breakfast.
I chuckled once reading the story, but if it was my kid I'd be furious for a day and think it was hilarious for weeks, including that day
Lol.
Guess what "kid" is having for dinner for the next month?
"How should I know? You ripped all them labels off, you tell me?"
Two by two, hands of blue...
Na don't make em eat the canned food, you probably know what's in the cans anyway. What you have to do is make fun of them for thinking this is a rational response. For the rest of their life it's "Careful don't make Carl mad or he'll be after your labels!" or " what are you gonna do fuck with the cans again?" this will cause childhood emotional trauma making them a more interesting and funny person or turning them bat shit insane. When they talk about it with their therapist in their 30's they'll storm out of the appointment because the shrink snorted at bare Can Carl, or talk about it on stage at the giggle hut down town
Just Google the codes printed on the can
But you gotta then remember the codes, you pick them up and shake them near your ear and say what it is.
Best part is you'll learn what your common canned foods sound like so even when they try to trick you by pulling off a can you don't know you'll still nail it. Never miss an opportunity to make your kids think your magic or something.
Guess it’s supper roulette time! Kid even gets to choose the can!
I never understood being grounded. When I was a kid, we just snuck out anyway because what are they gonna do, super ground us?
In my house it was:
Grounded.
Grounded to bedroom
Grounded to bedroom with all toys locked away (books didn't count)
I loved reading so I mostly just stopped there and read 30 volumes of old science magazines in a row.
For me at least, being grounded was the preferable alternative to having my ass beaten physically off my body with the nearest leather belt or wooden implement. I can serve my time and be free afterward, or I can make things worse for everyone involved, and still be grounded but also be physically harmed while I'm grounded.
Was this good and right? Hell if I know, man. It feels like a fundamental disrespect of someone's human rights, but also, I was ten, and it succeeded in teaching me to be less of an incorrigible little fucker.
It's called child abuse.
It was wrong and there were other ways to get you to be less of an incorrigible little fucker that wouldn’t have hurt you so much.