this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
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Go buy a canned something you know they don't like. Remove the labels and replace some of the cans with it. Require them to eat a mystery can a week.
Dog food is technically safe for human consumption.
I would say giving them one of the cans they unlabeled to eat for dinner each night is a reasonable consequence for their actions and could teach them a lesson about the need for emotional regulation at an age when the consequences are not severe.
Feeding a child dog food is child abuse and not appropriate in any situation. Though the premise is funny enough to be in a work of fiction, say in an adult sitcom on FX or some other edgy programming block.
That's why I said technically. After a few times of hitting random beans when they hit the dog food and go into a panic I'd be like "The factory must have mislabeled a run of something! I would call the factory so they could recall this lot number, but I don't know which factory to call since there's no label..." Turning it into a lesson on how there's more to identifying items than just knowing what you want to eat.
Once the kid was suitably panicked, I wouldn't actually make them eat it, but some kids are stubborn enough to try anyway, so: "technically."
So is gorilla kibble
Also apparently really high in protein compared to human food.