NO no... my condolences. I don't know how to process this.
this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2025
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I know Lem, he joined us for a few movie nights :(
I just want to say I'm so sorry for your loss comrade, that sounds really heavy.
That's awful and I'm so sorry, please take care of yourself and don't beat yourself up.
I've had this happen with 4 people I was close to at this point and let me tell you now, even if you saw the signs, even if you tried to do something, even if everything had been perfect, it can still happen. Absolutely do not blame yourself.
For anyone else going through these thoughts, remember that your death as a radical is a win for the bourgeoisie. Your very survival when you are an active advocate for the end of the current state of things is a victory for us. Of all those that I've seen go through this, it is comrades who have not committed suicide while it is those that did not radicalise who carried it out. The stubborn desire to rebel and revolt is stronger than the suicidal ideation.
All the best OP.
Very sorry for you and their loved one's loss
I am sorry, I understand the guilt. I had an ex and dear friend try to kill himself and damn near succeed. You can't predict the future, if you thought differently at the time you would have done something different. It's not on you, so many things have to go wrong before someone tries.
The guilt will fade in time, it's going to be hard. Try to be as gentle and understanding to yourself as you would be to someone else in the same situation.
Thank you, I have two people outside my family that have helped me process and listened to how I'm feeling. They have been great over the last couple days.
A lot of grief is lonely but it's good to share the parts that can be.
I’m sorry Sulv
Same thing happened to my brother. Same thing with delusions about being spied on. We weren't very close but I still find myself asking if he thought I wouldn't care if he did it.
I’m sorry for your loss. I’m worried he felt that way too. He’d be wrong if he did.
I'm so sorry for your loss. hugs
fuck thats rough man
too many of my queer friends have died to this over the years. you really do dissect every interaction, and i wish it got better. all i can say is that life is a very precious thing and its good that we got to experience it with the people we love while we could :\
Comrade I'm so sorry.
Fuck dude I'm so sorry. I had to intervene on my friend actively attempting to hang himself and I don't know if I will ever recover from that but at least he's still alive (for now).
A few years ago, right after losing 2 friends in the same way in quick succession, I made sure to promise my brother that I would not render him alone on this earth by my own hand.
If I were in those shoes I would be so devastated and I know he would too. The pain becomes an ache, but it never truly ends.
These things often happen for reasons outside the control of a second party, but any reason to keep on living is a good one.
I'm so sorry Sulv
personal and related
I've had a brother struggle with suicidality too and we're pretty estranged (at least for now), but him doing that is one of my worst nightmares.
we love you!
My father did that too 7 years ago, never blame yourself or try to look for any small little detail of "I could have", It doesnt really work like that, they wouldnt want you to think like that either. If you need to vent we are here.