this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2025
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Looks like Tuco finally met his match!

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[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 96 points 1 week ago (2 children)

i didn't know you could get arrested for that, it sounds ridiculous

[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 39 points 1 week ago (1 children)

A lot of states have very strict assault laws. For instance, in MA, Assault with a Dangerous Weapon can be brought against a person if they hit, throw, or spray pretty much any object or substance, including self-defense things like pepper spray.

[–] onslaught545@lemmy.zip 35 points 1 week ago (7 children)
[–] Chozo@fedia.io 45 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You're not thinking like a lawyer.

"Your honor, the defendant viciously and recklessly launched a dangerous substance - known to scientists as 'dihydrogen monoxide' - at my client. This chemical compound is commonly used in industrial cleaning operations and as a coolant in nuclear reactors. We seek damages up to $10,000,000,000 for pain and suffering."

[–] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago

It doesn't even have what plants crave your honor!!!

[–] psx_crab@lemmy.zip 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Have you considered she's maybe a ground type

[–] TheRealKuni@piefed.social 4 points 1 week ago

Or, Arceus forbid, a Charmander. If that tail flame goes out it dies!

[–] radix@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

People who have been sprayed with dihydrogen monoxide have a 100% rate of dying.

[–] floo@retrolemmy.com 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Starski@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Can't be too careful with that dihydrogen monoxide, 100% of people that drink it eventually die

[–] Zorque@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The more that someone drinks it, the higher their likelihood of dying.

[–] atzanteol@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's worse than that too. People become addicted to it and withdrawals will kill them in a matter of days.

[–] KoboldCoterie@pawb.social 2 points 1 week ago

It's the primary component in acid rain! In its gaseous form, it can cause severe burns from only brief contact! And would you believe that autopsies reveal this dangerous compound in the bodies of almost all deceased people? It should be outlawed!

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Water, where the sharks and kraken live? That water? Seems pretty dangerous to me!!!

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Water? Eugh. Never touch the stuff. Fish fuck in it.

[–] Cethin@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The other comments are joking, but I bet a "serious" (legally, not realistically) that the defendant didn't know if it was safe or not. Maybe the water had some dangerous chemicals in it? We all know that the argument would be bullshit, but I would bet that's what they'd say. Or a potential alternative would be that the intent was to have her fall and get hurt, or something like that.

[–] onslaught545@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

But it was from a hose. From the account it sounds like he asked her to move, she didn't, so he sprayed her a bit.

Even in her own admission she says she thinks it was intentional, which means that it could have also been accidental.

The correct response to a neighbor spraying you with a hose is to go inside and wipe off, not file a police report.

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Im assuming he sprayed an HOA Karen who didn’t like him washing his car on the driveway. This guy is arrested for spraying water and Raja Jackson almost murders a guy and is still on the loose

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago

With minor infractions, the City Attorney often defers prosecution and holds an office hearing, where the alleged offender is warned and sometimes agrees to anger management courses in exchange for dropping the charges.

Tuco taking an anger management course wasn't on my 2025 bingo

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Goddamn the quickie mart made apu bank

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

That was part of the premise of the episode about his bachelor eligibility and subsequent arranged marriage. It was also much more subtly visited upon in the octuplets episode.

Uh, spoiler warning for 28 year old and 26 year old Simpsons episodes, respectively.

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[–] Bell@lemmy.world 27 points 1 week ago

Wow kinda famous people have asshole neighbors too

[–] Suburbanl3g3nd@lemmings.world 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Wonder if the neighbor called his abuelita a bitch

[–] cjoll4@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Suburbanl3g3nd@lemmings.world 2 points 1 week ago

My b. Couldn't remember if those two kids called her a bitch or biznatch. Obvs the latter is significantly worse. Hence the utter beat down Tuco gave em

[–] barnaclebutt@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Awesome. I guess she never got his poo pushed in. (Training day)

Edit: he seems like a nice guy. I wonder what actually happened. Arrest seems extreme.

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[–] Harvey656@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The real crime is the dumbass tmz comments.

[–] fmstrat@lemmy.nowsci.com 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's been 5 hours now, the top comments have leveled off into mostly normalcy now. Humans overflowing the robots this time I guess.

[–] Harvey656@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

Maybe the humans hosed off the bots.

[–] umbraroze@slrpnk.net 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I don't want to go back to Reddit so I'm just going to assume r/okbuddychicanery is going to have a field day.

[–] Jakule17@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

No way Ho-se

[–] rhythmisaprancer@piefed.social 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I didn't watch enough Breaking Bad to know who this person played as a character, but with the years of memes and references, this seems like something that could have happened in the show.

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago (1 children)

heh, if it was in the show he'd be arrested for shoving the hose in the victim after disfiguring her

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Tuco! Neighbor was lucky he didn’t get a beat down

[–] hakunawazo@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago


The future:

[–] Archangel1313@lemmy.ca 8 points 1 week ago

I'd say that neighbor got off lucky.

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