this post was submitted on 16 Aug 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] sheogorath@lemmy.world 112 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

What about joe? Because the engineer who bootstrapped the project mistakenly put his name as the mainline branch and we realized it far too late during the lifecycle and the team decided to keep the branch name because it's hilarious.

[–] rtxn@lemmy.world 91 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (4 children)

Branch on every commit. Never delete. If something needs to be rolled back, merge it back into HEAD. Conflict resolution only through melee combat.

[–] SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social 44 points 2 weeks ago

Never merge. Only cherry pick.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 22 points 2 weeks ago

You have met every team I have ever worked with apparently

[–] NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

How have you survived in this world without exploding into a million little fiery merge conflicts?

[–] rtxn@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago

I let the interns handle those. If they survive, they get bragging rights.

[–] Rusty@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 weeks ago

Conflict resolution only through melee combat.

Wrestle with Jeff, Prepare for death.

[–] locuester@lemmy.zip 42 points 2 weeks ago
[–] GenosseFlosse@feddit.org 32 points 2 weeks ago

It's master3. Don't question it!

[–] Aatube@kbin.melroy.org 29 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] kubica@fedia.io 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I like prod because it makes less assumptions on stability. It is what is being used, good luck with the rest.

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[–] mercano@lemmy.world 24 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

“live” didn’t make it onto the list, I see.

[–] moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)
[–] sik0fewl@lemmy.ca 8 points 2 weeks ago

Live and let die?

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[–] tiredofsametab@fedia.io 21 points 2 weeks ago

Boring answer: older repos are master, newer ones are main. I've worked at companies that did other things such as having the prod branch be a branch called prod.

[–] AnotherPenguin@programming.dev 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Tja@programming.dev 29 points 2 weeks ago

Why would you name a branch just 7 asterisks?

[–] slazer2au@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago

Chaotic Evil should be the current sha hash.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

🤡 for master

👽 for test

💩 for dev

[–] palordrolap@fedia.io 15 points 2 weeks ago

belay your panic. even mommy cannot save you.

"testing"

don't wake up. fourth row just dropped.

[–] neukenindekeuken@sh.itjust.works 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Develop should be Chaotic Evil.

[–] roanutil_@programming.dev 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This is what is used where I work. I have never and will never understand why.

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[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 11 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Midnitte@beehaw.org 11 points 2 weeks ago

Feel like lawful evil fits better for master

[–] pelya@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

It's goshujin-sama

[–] independantiste@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] tamlyn@lemmy.zip 13 points 2 weeks ago

we use git-flow in our company. So release is already another branch.

[–] SkybreakerEngineer@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

Yall have multiple branches?

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

"fuck it, it''s friday"

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] xthexder@l.sw0.com 5 points 2 weeks ago

Untitled-project2_final_fixed-3.zip

[–] ronigami@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

(empty string)

[–] rem26_art@fedia.io 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] danc4498@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

it's a one way ticket to having "who's on first?" problems

[–] ripcord@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

If you never pu5 anything into production then you never fail

[–] pohart@programming.dev 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

qa.

All development happens in feature branches. Someone other than the original developer needs to build and test the feature on our development servers. If successful it gets merged into qa, where it gets built and tested against it qa servers. Production build are tags on qa.

[–] marsza@lemmy.cafe 7 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] dosuser123456@programming.dev 6 points 2 weeks ago

branch (i always commit directly to the main branch so i only have one, so why bother naming it. also YOU CANT STOP ME FROM DOING IT BWAHAHAHAHAHA)

[–] cute_noker@feddit.dk 6 points 2 weeks ago
[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Moab is “mouth over anus & balls”.

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[–] UntouchedWagons@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 weeks ago

Some of my repos on github use either main or master.

[–] RiQuY@lemmy.zip 5 points 2 weeks ago
[–] enbipanic@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 weeks ago
[–] rozodru@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Nomecks@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 weeks ago

Main is QA. Production is release branches.

[–] Mithre@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Our development branch is "working", then we have specific dated snapshots where we run our datasets through our programs.

[–] normalexit@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Hey Linus did you merge my branch into mommy? I really want to get it out.

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