this post was submitted on 16 May 2025
479 points (99.2% liked)

Programmer Humor

23290 readers
1842 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 27 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] bjorney@lemmy.ca 42 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) (2 children)

> want to compile 50kb C++ console app on windows

> 6 GB MSVC installation

[–] arty@feddit.org 5 points 7 hours ago

I keep seeing complaints from non JavaScript developers about their IDE not handling millions of files in a folder properly

[–] onlinepersona@programming.dev 11 points 9 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago) (1 children)

"It's so easy to compile C/C++ apps on Linux"

"Just run make install"

"If it doesn't work, fuck you, it worked on my machine"

Anti Commercial-AI license

[–] Kazumara@discuss.tchncs.de 9 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Hm. I've always found it harder to compile stuff on Windows.

[–] onlinepersona@programming.dev 3 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Oh, my comment was more that compiling C/C++ apps on any platform is shit. Windows may be the worst to compile on, but Linux is only marginally better.

Rust is amazing though.

Anti Commercial-AI license

[–] SomethingBurger@jlai.lu 3 points 7 hours ago

compiling C/C++ apps on any platform is shit

I'm starting to think the platforms aren't the problem.

[–] WoodScientist@sh.itjust.works 17 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Depending on the design of its memory, a device with a full drive will literally weigh slightly more or slightly less than one with an empty drive. Charging the battery in all cases causes it to weigh more.

[–] Shawdow194@fedia.io 63 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

The joke is always Javascript

[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 42 points 13 hours ago (7 children)

JavaScript itself is fine. The problem is developers who import a library to add two numbers.

[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 10 points 8 hours ago (2 children)

I don't know about "fine". It has a lot of weird stuff baked in. Hoisting. Unexpected type coercion. Too many ways to loop over something and I always forget which one is which. "There's more than one way to do it" is kind of a recurring problem, come to think of it. Several function declaration syntaxes. Dot notation AND bracket notation for objects.

Also it will forever bother me that object keys aren't quoted.

const foo = "hello"; const bar = { foo: "world" }

That should be, in my mind, { "hello": "world" } . It's not. It's { "foo": "world" }

But if you want to do that, you need to do const bar = { [foo]: world }. Which looks like your key is an array with one entry, a string with a value of "foo"

You also end up learning a whole framework, with its syntax and idioms, every couple years. Angular. React. Redux. Whatever.

There's also a lot of people who have never used anything else, and want to use javascript for everything.

Javascript is basically D&D. Wildly popular. Full of legacy jank. People try to use it for anything even though there are better or more specialized tools.

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 1 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

No need to convince me it's shit. Also how do you end up only knowing Javascript? Who the hell starts out using Javascript of all the languages?

[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 1 points 56 minutes ago

Anyone entering through web development. If you're self taught or did a "coding boot camp", it might be the only language you've used. A lot of places use it for backend stuff now, too

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 1 points 6 hours ago

After reading the JS Bible and listening to a lot of Kyle Simpson, I don't find any of those unusual or unexpected, but rather neat in the context of the language. And with enough practice, even the implicit return of an arrow functions jumps out at you.

[–] TheGalacticVoid@lemm.ee 18 points 10 hours ago (2 children)

Maybe we wouldn't need external libraries to do basic things if JavaScript had a standard library

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 3 points 9 hours ago

The thing you want from jQuery was added to all browsers in 2018.

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 4 points 10 hours ago

What is this crazy talk??

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 6 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Oh Hells no.

JavaScript is NOT fine, it's .... I'm really trying to think of a word that will convey the shit that it is without triggering half the people on Lemmy into an aneurysm, but I can't find it.

JavaScript is by far the worst. I've been working with JavaScript for the past 6 days and I want to hang myself, it'd be a better fate than continuing

[–] aev_software@programming.dev 2 points 3 hours ago

6 Whole Days!

Try 25 years. And it still surprises me.

[–] i_stole_ur_taco@lemmy.ca 26 points 13 hours ago

Excuse me, but it’s industry practice to always use PlusJs.

Its just annoying that it has its own dependency on MinusJs.

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 5 points 9 hours ago

Or ship a browser to run a script.

[–] Shanmugha@lemmy.world 3 points 9 hours ago

console.log([] == [])

[–] nickwitha_k@lemmy.sdf.org 9 points 11 hours ago

Use the modulo operator? Nah. Need to import the isEven library and a ton of other unnecessary sub-50 LOC libraries "maintained" by a single dev to make their CV look more impressive. /s

[–] andyburke@fedia.io 8 points 10 hours ago

lol at 3/4 of a megabyte of Vue components being ok and thinking node_modules is the issue at hand.

[–] joyjoy@lemm.ee 3 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

A package manager that does hard-linking helps.

[–] Emotional@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 19 minutes ago

I feel like every time I've suggested pnpm I got eyerolls :(